


All I Want (Is You)

by coconut_juice_00



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: M/M, this coconut doesn't know what she's doing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-22
Updated: 2018-04-05
Packaged: 2018-09-26 06:45:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 47,090
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9872075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coconut_juice_00/pseuds/coconut_juice_00
Summary: unfortunately for the two of them, the heart wants what it wants.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> sup doods, coconut here.  
> welcome to this suckish fic.  
> feel free to read this

 

Baekhyun doesn’t know how and Baekhyun doesn’t know why he fell in love with Do Kyungsoo. But he did, and frankly, he doesn’t want to change that.

 

Fat, wide-eyed short male with eyes big as an owl. Plush red lips and a heart-shaped smile that is so wide, every time Baekhyun sees it he can’t help but smile on his own. He has this air of innocence around him, it’s unmistakable. He’s very intelligent, too. No wonder he got in this exclusive school. But due to his appearance and his poor status, he’s always the subject for bullying. Eyes filled with envy following his every move. Baekhyun clenches his fists every time he would see this.

 

“It’s okay, Baekhyun.” He would say. “It doesn’t affect me. Really.”

 

“No, no… that’s not right.” Baekhyun cups his cheek. “This isn’t… You shouldn’t be treated this way.” Kyungsoo chuckles softly and grabs his hand, pulling it away. “Yah, Kyungsoo.”

 

“Look, it’s just another year and then it will all be over.” Kyungsoo smiles at him.

 

“But…” He yelps when Kyungsoo pinches his side. Baekhyun hums. “Yeah.” He takes Kyungsoo’s hands in his and smiles at the feeling of warmth coming from those hands. The breeze is chilly up at the rooftop but being with Kyungsoo – holding his hands like this make’s everything all right. “Then we’ll find a nice apartment near Seoul Uni and live together, right?” He nudges Kyungsoo when the younger remained silent. “Right, right…?”

 

Kyungsoo bursts giggling. “Whatever, Baekhyun.”

 

“No, I’m serious! It’s already planned inside my head… our future that is.” Baekhyun taps his head and half-smiles. He leans back on the wall and holds Kyungsoo’s hand, looking up at the blue sky with a smile. “You and me… it’s you and me forever.”

 

Kyungsoo looks at him fondly. “Seriously, Baekhyun.” He chuckles softly and squeezes their locked hands. “Seriously.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

That was 11 years ago.

 

 

 

 

 

 

“You’re gonna be super late, you do know that, right?” Jongdae sing-songs as he watches Baekhyun run back and forth from his closet to the mirror, switching clothes from left to right. He makes a face at the pink sweater and immediately throws it alongside pile of clothes.

 

“I told you to wake me up when it’s 6!” Baekhyun growls at his friend’s direction before running back at his closet. “Fuck, I don’t have any good clothes.”

 

Jongdae rolls his eyes at this. Then, he bends and picks up the first thing he ever saw on Baekhyun’s discarded pile. “Yo, Baek.” Baekhyun snaps his head at him. “Catch.”

 

Baekhyun has his arms stretched out, but the white turtleneck sweater lands on his face. Baekhyun takes it off and looks at the article of clothing with a smile. “Yes, this is perfect!” Jongdae raised his brows. Without another word, he took off his shirt and puts it in, brown tufts seen as he struggles to put it on. Jongdae shakes his head.

 

“How you got Joonmyeon proposing to you, I don’t know. How come you’re engaged to him? He’s too good to be true!”

 

“I know, right?” Baekhyun grins once he finally succeeds on putting it on. “Funny how I have him wrapped around my finger.” He winks and walks to the rack to take his coat. “I have to go. Please, lock the door when you leave.”

 

“Fine, fine. Go.” Jongdae lies on the bed with hands behind his head. “Don’t keep your Prince Charming waiting.”

 

“Aish.” Baekhyun giggles and exits the bedroom hurriedly. But a minute later, he quickly runs back and opens the drawer beside his bed, startling Jongdae. After a few seconds of rummaging, he pulls out a small necklace. “Forgot this.” He smiles then runs off again.

 

Jongdae stares at the door and sighs.

 

“Ah, that brat. Really.”

 

 

 

 

 

Baekhyun clutches the necklace on his hand tight. He knows he’s running late to his date with Joonmyeon but here he is looking down on this necklace. Despite its old age, it still looks beautiful – a treble clef. Baekhyun tilts his head at when he lifts it up on his eye level.

 

Even after all these years, his heart still longs for _him_.

 

After graduation, Kyungsoo disappeared. Nobody knew where he went and not once did he even contact him. Baekhyun grew desperate. And that desperation transformed into sadness overtime. Until finally, acceptance.

 

But still, no matter how much he tried to hate him, he can’t.

 

He just wants… to see Kyungsoo again.

 

Swallowing the incoming lump in his throat, he wears the necklace around his neck and hid it underneath his sweater.

 

He immediately spotted Joonmyeon when he arrived at the restaurant. There’s a smile coming its way on his lips and slowly, he crept up and grabs him by the shoulders. Joonmyeon makes an unmanly shriek and Baekhyun can’t help the laugh coming out of his throat.

 

“Oh my god, stop giving me mini-heart attacks, Baekhyun. Dammit.” Joonmyeon said while giving out a few laughs of his own. Baekhyun grins and sits down on the chair opposite of him.

 

“I’ll stop giving you one when he hit our 60’s.” Joonmyeon raised his brows upon hearing this. “Anyways, I’m sorry for coming late. I’ve got a long day yesterday and Dad keeps on giving me headaches. It’s unbearable. In fact, I just got back from Osaka this morning. I was just – everything was so…”

 

“…exhausting, I know.” Joonmyeon gives him a fond smile. Baekhyun stops and bites his lower lip. “Your Dad can be such a headache sometimes. I mean, I’m not a fan of baseball but I have to act like I’m entertained to make him happy.” Joonmyeon clears his throat. “Please don’t tell him that. I’m trying to take care of my good image to him.” Baekhyun guffaws.

 

“Look, it’s not like he’s going to ruin everything. Joonie, come on.” Baekhyun leans back. “Dad loves you. Mom loves you, hell, the whole family loves you. So stop…” He pauses when Joonmyeon holds his hand. “Stop… worrying about image because… you’re…” He didn’t get to continue because Joonmyeon leans over and gives his lips a soft and chaste kiss.

 

“I love you.” Joonmyeon whispers.

 

Baekhyun smiles in amusement. “Ditto.” Another quick kiss before Joonmyeon sits down.

 

“Anyways, I’ve been waiting for you to come before we order. And since it’s already my third glass of wine, you’re driving me home tonight.” Joonmyeon smirks and snaps his fingers. “Waiter, we’re ready to order.”

 

Baekhyun softly chuckles and leans his head on his knuckles.

 

 

 

 

 

“So who’s coming again?”

 

“Someone from the Park family will come and talk about the incoming project we’re about to do in Malaysia.” His mother said. Baekhyun looks at the documents about the details. “And as future chairman, your father and I think that it’s great if you go and talk to him instead.”

 

Baekhyun raised a brow and closes the folder. “So someone from the Park family.” He mutters. He looks at his parents. “What’s his name?”

 

“Landon Park.” His mother replied. “He’s the lead engineer of the project.”

 

“Yeah, okay. Landon Park.” Baekhyun slowly nods. “So what? He doesn’t sound like a native.”

 

“Oh, he’s Korean.” His mother clasps her hand with a faint smile. “That’s actually his English name, you know. He lived in the UK and even went to Oxford.” Baekhyun drowns the other information because he knows his mother is very fond of rich and successful people. It’s no wonder why she immediately approved of Joonmyeon.

 

“So will you be doing it?” His father’s gruff voice interrupted their conversation.

 

Baekhyun looks at the Chairman of the Byun Corporation. He holds their gaze for a moment before he nods. “I will. When will this meeting be?”

 

“This Wednesday. You’ll leave tomorrow morning. It’ll be held in their office.”

 

“Then I’ll tell my secretary to clear out everything in my schedule.” Baekhyun pulls out his phone and sees a message from Jongdae. “I need to go.” He smiles at his mother and hugs her. “I’ll call you later, mom.” He whispers and kisses her cheek before leaving.

 

 

 

 

 

“So Landon Park, huh?” Jongdae chews like a goat. 17 years old Baekhyun normally finds this disgusting but 11 years down the road, he finally grew used to it. He has a sandwich squeezed in both hands. “I think I’ve heard of that.”

 

Baekhyun raised a brow and takes a sip of his coke. “You know the guy?”

 

“No, but I heard he’s the youngest Park.” Jongdae lifts his hand and begins counting on his fingers. “Park Yoora, Park Chanyeol and Park Landon. Landon Park if you’re from the West.” He shrugs. “They’re like… a family of engineers. Well, except for Yoora since I see her all the time on TV.” Jongdae takes a bite. “So what about Landon Park?”

 

“I’m going to meet him for a discussion about the incoming project in Malaysia.” Baekhyun mutters. “So I have to be gone for three days. I have to go to England for the meeting. Maybe, I’ll look around afterwards. No biggie.”

 

“Leaving again, huh?” Jongdae wiggles his brows. “Does that mean you’re not going home tonight?”

 

Baekhyun playfully rolls his eyes. “Jongdae, what the fuck.”

 

“What? I just want to make things clear.” Jongdae shrugs and takes another bite. “If you’re not coming home, I’m going to invite Minseok to Netflix and Chill. Who says you’re the only one getting laid tonight?”

 

Baekhyun makes a face. “Oh, god. Don’t corrupt my favorite hyung. Dammit, Jongdae.”

 

Jongdae smirks. “For your information, he’s the naughty one.” Baekhyun threw a fry at his direction making the latter throw his head back and laugh. “So you’re not coming home tonight?”

 

“No… probably not.” Baekhyun grins and takes his phone. Jongdae wiggles his brows.

 

“Don’t forget to be safe, Baekhyunnie.”

 

“Shut up, Jongdae.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

Joonmyeon makes one particularly hard thrust that has Baekhyun arching his back, groaning in pleasure. As well as pain because his head managed to hit the head board a bit making Joonmyeon reel back and sober up from the lust-filled state.

 

“Shit, shit, shit…” Joonmyeon holds Baekhyun’s shoulder. “You okay? Sorry, that was –“

 

“It’s fine.” Baekhyun waves away, chest heaving up and down as he catches for air. “I told you I want it rough, didn’t I? It’s going to be three days after all.” He whines when Joonmyeon finally pulls out. “Damn, that feels great.”

 

“Really?” Joonmyeon smiles and folds his legs, sitting in front of Baekhyun. It’s dirty and lewd but Baekhyun still watches as Joonmyeon pulls out the condom and ties it before throwing it on the nearby bin. Finally noticing the eyes on him, Joonmyeon looks at his fiancé with a brow slightly arched. “What?”

 

“Wanna go again?”

 

“You have an early flight tomorrow. You need to rest.” Joonmyeon chastises. Baekhyun playfully whines and rolls on the bed once Joonmyeon moves to lie on his side of the bed. Baekhyun turns so he’s facing Joonmyeon. “You are such a baby, I swear.”

 

“You love me, anyway.”

 

His fiancé smiles. “I can never get enough of you.” Baekhyun closes his eyes as he lets his finger trace down from his forehead down to his lower lip. Slowly and carefully, he caresses pale soft skin, down to his jaw until his eyes landed on the silver necklace dangling on his neck. Joonmyeon furrows his brows. “Hey, why aren’t you wearing the necklace that I gave you?”

 

Baekhyun opens one eye. “Which one?” He giggles. “You gave me so many I don’t know which.”

 

“Ah, Baekhyun.” Joonmyeon clicks his tongue. “Really? I bought you those because I thought it would look better on you than that one.” He points at the treble clef necklace. “Be honest, Baekhyun. Do you even mean it when you said you love those necklaces I gave you?”

 

“Of course, I do! And I still have them – complete and out of the box.” Baekhyun exclaims in pride, but then he realizes that that’s not making things better. He sighs. “But… this little guy…” He holds it and smiles. “Has been with me throughout the years. I can’t just replace him.”

 

Joonmyeon opens his mouth to refute but in the end, just sighs and smiles. “Okay, Baekhyun. I understand.” He pulls his head close and presses his lips against his forehead. “But sooner or later, I am going to make you wear those necklaces I bought for you.”

 

Baekhyun giggles and snuggles close to him for warmth after the older drapes the covers over them.

 

 

 

 

 

_I can’t just replace him._

 

But I have to.

 

Baekhyun sits on the edge of the bed in the middle of the night after he makes sure Joonmyeon is already sound asleep. With his head in his hands, he drowns out the memories of Kyungsoo and tries to withstand the pain in his heart.

 

After all, first love never lasts.

 

 

 

 

The duration of the flight exhausts him. Baekhyun drags a hand down his face.

 

“Can you still keep up until we go to the hotel?” Luhan raised a brow at him. Baekhyun shakes his head and sighs.

 

“Yeah, I can manage.” Baekhyun replies. “Come on.”

 

 

 

 

 

Wednesday morning, Baekhyun wakes up by Luhan asking him to get up and prepare for today’s meeting. The secretary is already eating his plate of toast and bacon. Baekhyun mutters a thanks after seeing his food. His secretary knows he likes bacon partnered with rice.

 

“Landon Park’s secretary has emailed that he’ll be meeting us at the office, but Mr. Park won’t be able to join.” Baekhyun raised his brows upon hearing.

 

“What? That’s not right.” Baekhyun frowns. “The reason why we’re here is because we’re supposed to talk to him about the project. If this is going to happen, I should have just sent you here in London.”

 

“But…” Luhan raised his finger to hold up. “But Mr. Park would like to invite you for a lovely dinner tonight. Details will be forward later but I reckon it would be some fancy Italian restaurant.” He smirks when Baekhyun mutes. “Does that sound okay to you, Baek?”

 

Baekhyun drinks his water. “You… are troublesome, Luhan. You should have told me that sooner.”

 

“You were quick to react, not my problem.” Luhan grins and takes a bite of the toast. “You know, this Landon guy sounds… charming, doesn’t he?”

 

“He’s Landon Park not Landon Carter.” Baekhyun shakes his head in amusement. “Why is everyone around me always saying that? Just because his name is foreign doesn’t mean he’s that good-looking. For all we know, he’s actually a guy with a crooked teeth and big nose.” He takes a bacon between his fingers and takes a bite.

 

“Then what about Daniel Henney?”

 

Baekhyun points the bacon at him. “Daniel Henney is daddy.” Luhan shakes his head slowly and laughs. “Hey, why are you always doing this, huh? Every single time we go out for business meetings, you always keep on pointing out random guys.”

 

“Random hot guys, Baekhyun.” Luhan tuts. “Random hot guys.”

 

“Okay, fine. They were hot.” Baekhyun playfully rolls his eyes. “But what’s the point?”

 

“Baekhyun, Baekhyun.” Luhan sighs after the laughter died down. “You’re engaged. I know why you’re uptight because duh, you’re getting married soon. I’ve been there, but you really need to live a little, you know.”

 

“So you want me to cheat?” Baekhyun raised a brow.

 

“Not cheat, no.” Luhan shakes his head. “Live a little! Go and mingle with guys, I didn’t say fuck with them. Your bachelor life is slowly counting down to zero! You’re just feeding the eyes, Baekhyun. It’s not considered as cheating. That is if…” He narrows his eyes. “You’re too weak to temptation that’s why you’re so up -“

 

“I am **not** weak to temptation and I am **not** going to do that.” Baekhyun said firmly. “And excuse me, I am not uptight.”

 

Luhan frowns. “Uh, yeah… you are.”

 

“I am not turning this into mindless bickering.”

 

“It would be fun if I were you.” Luhan grins. “Landon Park sounds hot.”

 

Baekhyun raised a finger. “I’ll tell Kris-hyung on you.”

 

Luhan fakes a gasp. “Don’t you dare.”

 

 

 

 

 

Meeting with Landon’s secretary is a brief one. She talks clearly and would sometimes switch form Korean to English. Her Korean has an accent though but still understandable. But still Baekhyun prefers to hear her talk in English. Somehow that British accent makes her look prettier. Even his secretary who’s married to a guy thinks she’s hot, too.

 

Baekhyun got to do a bit of walking and basks in the sight of London. He wanted to go tour a bit but the time to do that isn’t enough. He decided to do that tomorrow.

 

It wasn’t long before the time to meet Landon Park at the restaurant came.

 

The restaurant Landon wanted him to come isn’t that far from the hotel where he’s staying at so going there by himself isn’t trouble. The place looks fancy, though, and the lights around the place looks straight out from a fairy tale. Baekhyun looks around as he walks and stops when he reaches the counter.

 

 _“Good evening, sir. Do you have any reservation?”_ The woman said in thick British accent. She has a lovely smile, too. Baekhyun smiles back.

 

_“Ah, yes. A reservation for Mr. Park?”_

_“Mr. Park?”_ The woman smiles and gestures. _“This way, please.”_

Baekhyun follows the woman and mutters a thanks after she showed him their reserved table. It’s awkward sitting here alone as he waits for Landon Park to come. Sipping gingerly on his glass of red wine and looking around. The place isn’t that crowded much and majority of the people who come here are couples. Baekhyun takes another sip.

 

“Hey, wait…Yoseob.”

 

“Hey, come on. It looks great! Let’s go sit there.”

 

They’re Koreans. Baekhyun turns his head and looks at the petite male who can’t stop giggling as he holds hands with another male beside him. The other man is slightly chubby with thick black rimmed glasses perched up on his nose but despite that, the petite male is looking at him with that tender gaze – not the one who looks at physical appearances. The golden band wrapped around their fingers are answers enough.

 

Ah, newly-weds.

 

Just like that he’s reminded of Kyungsoo.

 

There’s a big what if hanging as he stares at the happy couple. If that would have been them if Kyungsoo didn’t disappear after graduation. Will they be like that? Happy and in love? Married and travelling the world in their honeymoon? Baekhyun licks his drying lips and takes another sip of wine and looks away.

 

But that’s all they were – what ifs.

 

“I’m sorry, I’m late.” The man said in accented Korean.

 

Baekhyun his head and stands up. “Oh, no. In fact, I just…”  And when he looks at him, Baekhyun stills. “…arrived.” 

 

Wide eyes and heart-shaped lips, brown eyes staring at him intensely, a wave of nostalgia hits him like a freight train and he can’t help the sudden race of his heart – desperation and sadness, mixing together. His chest clenches.

 

“ _K-Kyungsoo_ …?” He said and he’s surprised at the way his voice breaks.

 

However, the man – Landon Park – furrows his brows and looks at him in confusion. “Excuse me?”

 

And just like that, the spell breaks. Baekhyun forced himself to snap out of it and shakes his head. “Uh… I – sorry, Mr. Park. I must have… I’m sorry, I must have mistaken you for someone else.” Baekhyun forces a laugh and reaches his hand out for a shake. “It’s nice to meet you, Mr. Park. I am Byun Baekhyun.”

 

Landon nods and accepts it, shaking it twice. “I’ve heard of you. I share the same sentiments. Please sit down.”

 

Baekhyun nods and sits down. His hands are shaking.

 

“I hope I didn’t make you wait too long.” Landon said, lips quirking into a half-smile. It’s painfully identical as Kyungsoo’s. “I was caught up with traffic on the way from the office to here. Have you checked out the menu?”

 

“Oh, yes.” Baekhyun takes the menu on the side and looks at it. Landon Park looks the same as Kyungsoo. The other side of him wants to pull him up and wrap him in a tight embrace. The sane part however, wants to run away. But despite these conflicting emotions, Baekhyun forces himself to calm down.

 

After the waiter walks away after taking their orders, Landon looks at him. “About the construction, I would like to point out a few details…” He trails.

 

 

 

 

 

_“Say what now?”_

Baekhyun stares at the dark city lights of London as he shifts the phone on his other ear. “Landon Park… looks like Kyungsoo. Or rather, I think… Landon Park **is** Kyungsoo.” Baekhyun runs his fingers through his hair. “He looks a lot like Kyungsoo and I just… Jongdae, I –“ His breaths turned panicky. “I just fucking need to see him again.”

 

 _“Okay, okay, okay… woah, Baek. Are you fucking kidding me, Baekhyun?”_ Jongdae barks a laugh of disbelief. _“Here you go again with your obsession with that guy! Stop doing this shit, whatever it is you’re trying to do! You’re only going to get hurt.”_

“You don’t understand me, Jongdae.” Baekhyun feels pathetic, but he needs to voice it out or else he’ll get crazy. “It’s been 11 years since he’s gone and I… I just need to know if he is Kyungsoo.”

 

 _“Baekhyun.”_ Jongdae sighs. _“I’m warning you, Baek. Kyungsoo… left you for a reason. I just… don’t want to see you hurting yourself again.”_

Unable to say a response to that, Baekhyun ended the call.

 

He heaves out a heavy sigh and stares at the city lights in a daze and yet, his mind is wandering to his meeting with Landon Park earlier. Baekhyun presses his head against the window and closes his eyes.

 

If Landon Park is really Kyungsoo, he needs to know why he left him.

 

He needs answers.

 

 

 

 

 

Kyungsoo stares at his reflection on the mirror after washing his face over and over in an attempt to wake himself up from the delusion his mind has made. Seeing Baekhyun again stirred certain emotions that he spent so many years closed up and hidden after trying to focus on work.

 

He remembers Baekhyun’s expression – that broken voice when he calls his name.

 

His indifference almost fell on that moment, but he held on and kept his confused facade.

 

Kyungsoo’s grip on the sink tightens.

 

“You did a good job, Park Landon.” He whispers. “You did a good job.”

 

_Know your place._

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> unbeta'd (as always)


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ever since his parents died in a freak accident, Kyungsoo had been fending off on his own when he started schooling in Oxford. He thought he was done for because the scholarship isn’t enough to keep him in but he’s surprised that there was apparently someone secretly taking care of his college fees.
> 
> That was Mr. Park – Chanyeol’s father.

“Landon!”

 

Said guy stops doing pull ups from the bar and shifts his eyes at the newcomer coming entering the gym. He releases his tight grip on the bar and lands his feet on the floor. “Landon?” He scoffs a laugh. “I thought you hate calling me that.”

 

“Okay, fine.” The man raises his hands in mock surrender. “ _Kyungsoo_.”

 

Kyungsoo pants heavily and places his hands on his hips while he catches his breath. “What do you want, Chanyeol? Dad wanted me for something?”

 

Chanyeol chuckles as he approaches the smaller. “No, no.” He hangs the towel on Kyungsoo’s face and walks past him and warms up. “I just want to tell you that you should really stop focusing on pull ups and do sit ups instead. You have the guns but you don’t have the abs – yeouch! Don’t pinch me!”

 

“This…” He points at his stomach. “Is still under construction.”

 

“Ah.” Chanyeol stops on stretching his legs and pinches a bit of skin on Kyungsoo’s stomach. “Needs a lot of work. Your chest muscles, though.” He makes a motion of squeezing them only to groan again when Kyungsoo hits his arm. “Quit it! How could you hit your brother, Kyungsoo-yah?” He whines.  

 

Kyungsoo makes a face then grins in amusement.

 

Ever since his parents died in a freak accident, Kyungsoo had been fending off on his own when he started schooling in Oxford. He thought he was done for because the scholarship isn’t enough to keep him in but he’s surprised that there was apparently someone secretly taking care of his college fees.

 

That was Mr. Park – Chanyeol’s father.

 

Mr. Park claims that he sees potential on Kyungsoo and that if he does well, he’ll continue on paying for his college fees. So Kyungsoo did everything that he can and managed to graduate with flying colors.

 

In the span of those years, he met the Park’s youngest, Park Chanyeol who’s studying in Stanford around that time, and they instantly became best friends. He met the eldest Park, Park Yoora, aiming to be a news anchor and of course, Mrs. Park. Being with them makes Kyungsoo feel at home – like he’s never a nuisance. In fact, Mrs. Park was the one who encouraged her husband to help Kyungsoo with his studies.

 

It was unexpected, really. At the dinner celebration of his graduation, Kyungsoo thanked them for the support they gave him throughout the years and asked if there’s anything he can do for them to repay their kindness. And in response, Mr. Park said.

 

_“Be a Park.”_

 

So after he was formally adopted by the Park’s, he changed his name as Park Kyungsoo, also known as Park Landon in the west. He’s been known as Landon by his classmates and teachers and his co-workers in this country that Kyungsoo decided to just stick with it. After all, Landon is the new improved version of himself. Kyungsoo was this fat loser kid who gets bullied all the time.

 

His life is good now. No more going back to the past.

 

Even if this painful past has Baekhyun.

 

Even if it would mean forgetting Baekhyun’s beautiful smile. Baekhyun’s warm hands.

 

_Baekhyun’s soft lips._

 

“Kyungsoo.”

 

Kyungsoo turns his head to look at Chanyeol. “Hey, what’s up with you?”

 

“Nothing.” Kyungsoo wipes his face with the towel. “Look, I need to go. See you later?”

 

“Yeah.” Chanyeol wiggles his finger. “Bye, _little bro._ ”

 

“Stop calling me _little_.” Kyungsoo rolls his eyes and walks away. Chanyeol throws his head back and laughs hard only to stop when Kyungsoo’s towel smacks on his face.

 

 

 

 

 

On that same night, he braved himself by sending a text message about meeting Landon over tomorrow. And to his relief, the reply that came tells him that he would accept and even give him a tour around London as a thanks for that good deal they had over the project.

 

Luhan looks surprised when he sees him all dressed up and ready to leave when the secretary entered their hotel room. With brows furrowed, he asked. “Where are you going?”

 

“Oh, I’m meeting Mr. Park for a meeting out.” Baekhyun said curtly. “Do you mind taking any calls from my father? I won’t be bringing my work phone.” He takes his phone out of his coat pocket and hands it over to him. “If you need me for something, call me on my personal number.”

 

“Ah…” Luhan slowly nods. “So you’re going on a date, is that it?”

 

Baekhyun’s eyes went wide. “No, I-I am certainly not going on a date with Mr. Landon Park!” He smoothens his coat and huffs. “I-It’s just a meeting between two business partners.” 

 

Luhan makes a face then smirks. “So tell me…” He leans forward. “How is Landon Park? Does he look hot like his name or what?” He makes a noise when Baekhyun pushes his face away.

 

“He looks Korean, that’s what.” Baekhyun mutters. “Look, I need to go. Call me if you need anything. If none, go out and look around. You can use my credit card if you want to go out and eat.”

 

Luhan snorts. “I have my own money, you know.”

 

Baekhyun shrugs before he closes the door.

 

Luhan sighs. “Ah, that kid.”

 

 

 

 

 

He sees Landon with his hands inside his coat pocket, sitting on the bench near the fountain at the town plaza. People are all buzzing and walking in different directions. The noise crowds his ear but in this exact moment, all Baekhyun could see is him.

 

It was as if it’s a scene from a movie.

 

Baekhyun shakes his head and licks his drying lips as he approaches him. “Hi.” Landon looks up and meets his eyes, standing when he sees it’s Baekhyun.

 

“Baekhyun-sshi.” Landon gives a small bow of head. “Are you ready to go on that tour I promised or would you rather eat something first?” He checks his watch. It’s still around nine in the morning, Baekhyun checked. But around this hour, Kyungsoo usually eats lunch early. It’s a trait similar to him so Baekhyun mentally checks that on the _Landon is actually Kyungsoo_ list.

 

“No, I’m still full due to breakfast.” Baekhyun answers. “But if you would like, we could grab brunch?”

 

Landon purses his lips and raised his brows. “Have you eaten crepe here in London?” He pursed his lips and smiles. “They are delicious.”  

 

_“I’m craving for some crepes.” Kyungsoo smiles lazily as he rubs his tummy in a circular motion. Baekhyun turns his attention away from the music video playing on his phone to look at his boyfriend._

_“You’re hungry again?” Baekhyun huffs. “I think I have a coupon somewhere in my bag. Wanna check that new item on their menu?”_

_“Not that crepe. I want crepes from London.” Kyungsoo grins._

_“They’re just the same.” Baekhyun raised a brow. “And what? You want to go to London just to eat crepe? What the hell, Soo?”_

_“No, they’re not.” Kyungsoo pouts. “London crepes are bigger!” He giggles when Baekhyun pinches his cheeks. Baekhyun hums._

_“Someday, Kyungsoo. We’re going there. Two of us on a date in London.” Baekhyun grins. “Won’t that be romantic?”_

Baekhyun feels his chest tighten. He shakes off the memory and smiles back. “A crepe would be nice.”

 

Baekhyun watches as Landon walks ahead after telling him to follow him. His physique changed a lot since the last time they saw each other. Kyungsoo isn’t that chubby kid anymore who’s insecure about his looks and actions. Kyungsoo changed a lot. He… even changed his name.

 

Did he really think lowly of him to change this way?

 

Baekhyun looks down. It’s not even confirmed if Landon **is** Kyungsoo. Why is he even thinking like this?

 

It’s a small store – a coffee shop rather. Landon picked a spot near the window. After their orders arrived, Baekhyun finds that he’s the only one with the plate. Landon is having coffee. He furrowed his brows and sets the other crepe aside. “I thought you would join me to eat.”

 

“Coffee is fine with me.” Landon answers curtly. “Please enjoy your meal.”

 

Baekhyun takes a bite and can’t help the moan to escape his lips. There’s this exact amount of sweetness that cancels out the slight sour aftertaste of the strawberry making it balance out. Baekhyun licks his lower lip. “This tastes good.” He said after swallowing. “It’s a shame that I’m the only one eating.”

 

Landon flashes a half-smile. “You are my guest. It’s not always you find yourself in London, Baekhyun-sshi. My goal for today is to make you satisfied with your stay. After all, we will be working together soon.”

 

“I know that but still…” Baekhyun takes a slice and lifts the fork on the man’s eye level. “I insist.” When Landon opens his mouth to protest, Baekhyun quirks a brow. “As your guest, you have no right to say no.”

 

Landon holds their eye-contact for a moment. It was just a few seconds but still, Baekhyun would be lying if that didn’t make his heart skip. But despite that, Baekhyun still kept his challenging gaze. Then slowly, Landon leans in opens his mouth and takes the food, his lips even touching the fork. He chews and swallows, wiping his handkerchief on his lips.

 

“Satisfied?” He asks with a smile.

 

Baekhyun blinks dumbly, too flustered to even react.

 

“My sugar level easily gets high that’s why I limit myself in eating sweets.” Landon explained. “But please, help yourself with some more. The owner is a family friend so there’s nothing to worry about.”

 

“I-I see.” Baekhyun nods dumbly and takes another bite to eat.

 

It was only then when Landon was over the counter paying for their food that he realized they just shared an indirect kiss. Baekhyun drags a hand down his face and heavily blows a puff of air to cool his flustered state. He knows he’s walking over dangerous line. Like… toeing it.

 

He doesn’t even know if Landon is Kyungsoo, yet.

 

 

 

 

 

London is filled with anything that is Sherlock Holmes and everywhere the younger male took him, it has Baekhyun feeling loads of happiness. Despite not being a fan of the character, Landon looks like he’s enjoying himself while talking about these type of things. Baekhyun took a few shots of himself at the museum. He thinks of sending those pictures to Luhan to make the secretary jealous.

 

Probably the most boring part was watching a game of tennis at a grand arena. For Baekhyun, that is. But Landon talked about it in such a thrill and excitement that Baekhyun can’t help but get infected by his enthusiasm. It wasn’t long before he too began shouting his cheers after the reigning champion won, even going as far as raising his hands in glee.

 

Too bad the player actually knew Landon personally and she even kissed his cheek as a greeting. As a fucking greeting! Baekhyun keeps his smile tight and firm as he watches the exchange. He suddenly wishes she got destroyed at the grass court earlier.

 

After eating a late lunch, Landon took him to the famous Big Ben – that humungous tall clock tower that tourists adores and loves. It’s a sight to behold and it was no joke how big it is. In fact, he thought that the tourist pamphlets were lying about how big it was. 

 

Baekhyun gasps in awe. “Wow.”

 

“Amazing, isn’t it?” Landon said beside him. “In my early days here, I used to come here all the time. But tourists were crowding up the place so I don’t prolong my stay here.”

 

It’s kind of ironic how Baekhyun used to listen back then how he fantasizes about their future dates walking around the streets in London and holding hands and yet here he is 11 years later with Kyungsoo but in a different identity. He remembers Kyungsoo telling him that they would take a picture in front of Big Ben and post the photo on the walls of their supposed room after they come back home.

 

“Penny for your thoughts?” Landon asked snapping him out of his reverie.

 

“Oh,” Baekhyun blinks and looks at him. “Nothing, I was just…” He forces a chuckle. “It’s silly because standing here reminds me of something.”

 

Landon slowly nods. “Ah, I see.” Then he looks up and slips his hands inside his coat pocket. “Being here also reminds me of something. I guess it’s something we have in common.” He looks at him with a small smile before walking away.

 

Baekhyun’s fingers twitches like body instincts is reacting to hold the other male’s hand. Baekhyun shakes his head and stuffs his hands inside his coat pocket before following him.

 

Another thing that Baekhyun was fond of doing back then was staring at Kyungsoo’s back. When they were still strangers, Baekhyun used to do that. When the younger would walk past him or when he’s ahead of the line at the cafeteria. When they got together, the habit stayed the same. Right now, Baekhyun still finds himself doing it.

 

It seems like the habit never left him.

 

He thinks that if he’s ever going to find out if Landon is Kyungsoo, he’s going to have to step over the boundaries or rather, toe on them. He’s still afraid that if ever his assumptions are wrong, things might get weird between the two of them. It’s bad especially when they’re already forming some sort of friendship.

 

“It’s actually my first love,” Landon stops walking and looks at him. Baekhyun’s steps comes to a halt when he sees the man’s reaction. “He used to tell me he have always wanted to go on dates here in London when we grow up.”

 

“First love.” Landon hums. “That’s nice.” He turns around and continues walking. Baekhyun follows behind. “Are you two still together?”

 

“No,” Baekhyun bitterly smiles and shakes his head. “He left me, actually. Disappeared all of the sudden after graduation. I tried to look for him but he was gone, really. So here I am, still bearing scars from him.”

 

“That’s unfair.” Landon furrows his brows. “And it’s actually selfish of him to leave just like that without any kind of explanation. There must be something that’s why he left. Everything has a reason, after all.”

 

“I know.” Baekhyun stares at the younger’s back. “That’s what I’d like to find out.”

 

Landon stills upon hearing that. He can feel his chest pounding in anticipation, nervousness, all pent-up emotions mixed together acting up as Landon slowly turns around to face him. But to his surprise, Landon was looking at him with a neutral expression.

 

“Finding answers is great, Baekhyun-sshi, but so is moving forward.” Landon flashes him a half-smile. “I heard you’re engaged to Kim Joonmyeon.”

 

Baekhyun is suddenly dawned with the sudden wake-up call that yes, he’s already engaged. He’s engaged to a wonderful man back at Seoul. He clenches fists inside his coat pocket and nods, giving a smile of his own. “Yes, I am. How did you know?”

 

“It’s all over magazines, if you’re not aware.” Landon chuckles. “The Byun’s and the Kim’s are influential families, after all. Gossip can’t be avoided.” He shrugs and resumes on walking. “I know first loves had a huge impact in your life but they’re all in the past. I prefer to focus on the present and live happy.”

 

Baekhyun can’t help but frown. “You speak like it comes from experience.”

 

“Well,” Landon sighs and cranes his neck to look at Baekhyun with a smile. “Let’s just say my first love left me some scars, too.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

Baekhyun smiles as he sees Kyungsoo entering the room. Kyungsoo’s room is cramp and yet, of all places, Baekhyun still prefer to be here than his room back at home. Baekhyun’s room may be large and spacy but it lacks that warmness Baekhyun desperately seeks. Kyungsoo’s eyes went wide at the sight before a soft chuckle escapes his lips.

 

“And you’re here again. Surprise, surprise.”

 

“I was bored, sue me.” Baekhyun opens his arms. “Come here.” But the moment he did, Baekhyun suppresses the groan coming out of his mouth when Kyungsoo parks his ass on his lap. He clears his throat and circles his arms around his waist. He thanks the heavens he has long arms.

 

“Baekhyun, you should really eat more.” Kyungsoo said. “You’re like skin and bones.”

 

“Believe me, I want to but I don’t think you can lift me at our wedding, which I prefer if you do.” Baekhyun presses his lips against Kyungsoo’s back and pushed him with all his might to get the younger’s back hitting on the bed. It requires a lot of force because of how heavy Kyungsoo is but what he wants to do is romantic enough that has Kyungsoo blushing heavily when Baekhyun traps him with his arms.

 

“You will be the death of me, I swear.” Baekhyun coos.

 

“Because I might crush you?”

 

“No, silly.” Baekhyun laughs despite it being kind of true. Not that he doesn’t mind to be crushed to death by Kyungsoo. “It’s because you’re cute.”

 

Kyungsoo squeezed his face. “I bet you tell this to all the people you’ve dated.”

 

“Sure.” Baekhyun shrugs. “But you are the first person I said that in pure honesty.”

 

Kyungsoo smiles and pinches his nose making Baekhyun yelp.

 

 

 

 

 

“Baekhyun-sshi.”

 

Baekhyun opens his eyes just as the car Landon is driving stops. It’s already dark and there’s not much any people walking on the streets unlike before. He looks at the window and sees that they’re already at the hotel he’s currently staying.

 

Quietly, Landon asked. “Did you had fun today?”

 

Baekhyun turns to look at him smiles. “Yes, I did.” Landon’s eyes are beautiful and warm and it took all of his might not to get sucked in those deep orbs so he looks down and slowly turns away. Landon slowly nods.

 

“I’m glad.” Landon whispers.

 

Baekhyun’s breath hitched upon hearing that, his heart thumping rapidly even if he’s not facing him.  There was a long pause before he speaks again.

 

“I’m looking forward to be working with you in the near future.” Landon said. This time he has that professional stance and business tone. “I hope you have fun on your stay here in London.”

 

Baekhyun nods. “Yeah.” Then he looks at him and smiles. “I will.”

 

 

 

 

 

“I saw you.” Baekhyun jolts when he hears the teasing tone coming from behind him when he swipes his hotel card key. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know that it was his secretary. Plus, judging by the time he must have been frolicking around the hotel’s entertainment lobby.

 

“Saw me what?” Baekhyun twists the knob and opens the door, stepping inside.

 

“With a guy.” Luhan nudges his arm. “Huh, huh… you were coming out of that fancy car. Was that Mr. Park you were with?”

 

“Yes, yes…” Baekhyun sighs and takes off his coat. Luhan takes it once he drops it off and hangs it on a rack. “So is there anyone that called me today? I didn’t get any messages here in my phone.”

 

“Ah, no…” Luhan raises a brow and tails after him. “But hey, how come I’m the only one who feels excited about all of this. Was the trip with Mr. Park that boring?”

 

Baekhyun pauses and thinks. No, it wasn’t. In fact, Baekhyun had fun and he’s ashamed of himself for having forgotten about Joonmyeon around Landon. Maybe Jongdae was right. This _obsession_ he has for Kyungsoo has got to stop. But still, the growing curiosity of finding out if Landon is really Do Kyungsoo nags his head. He needs to know. He _wants_ to know.

 

“It wasn’t.” Baekhyun pulls his phone out and sees a message from Joonmyeon. He quickly opens it.

 

_Luhan said you were out on a meeting today. Call me when you’re free?_

Baekhyun doesn’t know what thought passed his mind, but today he’s beyond exhausted – emotionally and physically. Talking with Joonmyeon might trigger that guilty part of him. He hates himself for acting like this – for even lying… Baekhyun sighs and types in a reply.

 

**I’m sorry, Joonie. I just got back and I’m really exhausted. I’ll call you first thing in the morning here to make up for it. I love you and I miss you :)**

Baekhyun sighs. Well, he isn’t lying about the exhausted part.

 

“I’m going to get a drink. Want to come?” Baekhyun turns his head to look at his secretary. Luhan beams.

 

“Why are you even asking me that? Of course, I’ll go!” Luhan grins.

 

Baekhyun chuckles softly and slowly shakes his head.

 

 

 

 

 

The next day, Baekhyun is holding is bag with Luhan beside him.

 

On the other side, Kyungsoo has his bags ready but with Chanyeol’s tremendous hug, the bags fell on the floor with a thud. Their older sister, Yoora, laughs at this.

 

They were ready to go back not knowing what tomorrow might become.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> unbeta'd (as always)


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s irritating how Baekhyun still cannot get over Kyungsoo even after 11 years. Memories of the younger are good and sweet but because of that, losing him makes those memories bitter and painful to remember. Maybe because of his huge attachment to the younger that he felt desperate then. Out of all the people that came in his life, Kyungsoo made the biggest impact after all.

 

It’s irritating how Baekhyun still cannot get over Kyungsoo even after 11 years. Memories of the younger are good and sweet but because of that, losing him makes those memories bitter and painful to remember. Maybe because of his huge attachment to the younger that he felt desperate then. Out of all the people that came in his life, Kyungsoo made the biggest impact after all.

 

“Holy shit. Baekhyun, what the fuck?” Joonmyeon has a hand on his chest when he enters the bedroom. He blinks rapidly before laughing. “You didn’t tell me you’d come. I thought you’re out with your parents.”

 

“I ditched.” Baekhyun grunts when he sits up the bed. His eyes followed Joonmyeon’s movements, from shrugging his coat off and hanging it up on a hanger and taking the belt off his slacks. Baekhyun tilts his head and rests his cheek on his knuckles. “Plus, I haven’t seen you since I came back two days ago. I want to spend some time with you.”

 

Hearing that made Joonmyeon smile. “You do know that I understand, right?” One by one Joonmyeon unbuttons his dress shirt. “Especially with this new project coming, it’s going to be a busy year for you.” He takes off his dress shirt revealing lean body and smooth skin underneath the white sleeveless shirt. 

 

“We haven’t been spending much time together.” Baekhyun pouts.

 

“I know and I’m telling you, it’s okay. Besides,” Joonmyeon takes it off and puts on a clean one. Before undoing his pants, he looks at Baekhyun cheekily. “It’s not like I’m free the whole time, you know. I’ve been busy running the business lately. Mom’s been on my case since a week ago. It’s rather frustrating, to be honest.” He sighs.

 

Baekhyun lowly whistles when the pants drop. “No offense but your mom’s a nutcase.”

 

“Still offended.”

 

“It’s okay, though. Mine’s one, too.”

 

“You’re mean.” Joonmyeon makes his way to him. The bed dips when he sits beside him and before Baekhyun could comment about the way the bed squeaks unnecessarily, Joonmyeon slants his lips on his and gives him a long lingering kiss. Joonmyeon smiles. “You taste nice.”

 

“Like burger.” Baekhyun grins. “I ate a burger before I came here.”

 

“You taste good every time I kiss you.” Joonmyeon kisses his ear. “Especially when I kiss that thing down there.” Baekhyun giggles and pushes him gently on his chest.

 

“Hold it right there, mister.” Joonmyeon playfully raises his brows. “We are not having sex tonight.” Baekhyun furrows his brows. “I mean, that will come next but I think…” Baekhyun crawls until he reaches the end table. He even wiggles his butt to tease his fiancé. “We should watch a movie first.”

 

“It’s not like we’re going to watch it anyway.” Joonmyeon mutters.

 

“Plus, I’m hungry!” Baekhyun throws the remote on Joonmyeon’s lap, startling him. “Order some chicken and start the movie! I can’t have sex with an empty stomach, Joonie. The burger isn’t enough!”

 

“Well if you had given me a heads up, I could have gotten food on the way home.” He flicks Baekhyun’s forehead making said man yelp before turning on the wide flat screen TV that’s in front of the bed. He tosses the remote back to Baekhyun. “Pick the movie you want to watch while I go make a call. How about honey chicken and pizza?”

 

Baekhyun breaks his eyes away from the TV and beams. “I love you.”

 

Joonmyeon chuckles. “Honey chicken and pizza, it is.”

 

 

 

 

 

Kyungsoo lifts his head up from the covers and exhales loudly, looking up at the dark ceiling of the room. He can feel arms sliding up his side and hot breath panting on his neck. Kyungsoo groans and wipes the sweat off his brow. “Ryeowook-hyung, it’s hot.”

 

“I know. Everyone tells me that after sex.” Ryeowook laughs when Kyungsoo gives him a look. He rolls away and pushes himself up so he’s sitting. “It’s been a long time since you came back. To be honest, you being here makes me happy. Didn’t you miss me?”

 

He met Kim Ryeowook back at his college years at a café. He was a singer there and did some numbers on nights. Kyungsoo became a fan of him then and because Chanyeol was actually an acquaintance of the guy, they got to meet. Ryeowook was in a relationship with a man named Donghae then. When they got to meet again, it was here in Korea and he’s already married to a guy named Choi Siwon. When he came back after a few years, Kyungsoo learned that he’s engaged to a singer Kim “Yesung” Jongwoon.

 

Kyungsoo chuckles. “Of course, I did. But I didn’t expect the sex, though. What happened with you and Yesung-sshi?”

 

“Divorced, duh.” Ryewook smirks. “Same reason as why I ended things with Siwon.”

 

“Promiscuous as always.”

 

“Hey, I can’t be tied down. You know that.” Ryeowook huffs. “Plus, Jongwoon always has paparazzi’s tailing on him like a shadow. I don’t like that.” He looks up and frowns. “And he always goes away a lot after he got signed on a movie deal.” He shrugs. “I don’t like that either.”

Kyungsoo fake gasps. “If the press finds out, this is going to be huge. Especially if not long before you got divorced, you’ve been sleeping around lately. It’s going to be bad.”

 

“Puh-lease.” Ryewook smirks. “I’ve been doing this all my life. If there’s anyone who’s going to look out, it’s him. I’ve suspected him sleeping with one of his back-up dancers when he was on tour, I just didn’t point it out.” He shrugs. “If the press finds out about that, it might be a huge fall from grace. On the other hand,” He traces his finger on his chest. “If the paps found out about us, it’ll be a huge level up for me.”

 

Kyungsoo slowly raised his brow and pushes his finger off slowly. “How about no?”

 

Ryewook chuckles as if he’s expected that. “Oh, the great Landon Park. Smart, charming and a gorgeous bachelor. Who would have thought he’d come here first after coming back to South Korea?”

 

“You offered a place to stay in your lavish penthouse.” Kyungsoo smirks. “Do I have the right to refuse?” When Ryewook lights up a cigarette, Kyungsoo takes it in between his fingers and crushed it on the ashtray on the end table at the elder’s side. “Instead of wasting your life away, why don’t you find yourself a suitable partner and keep doing your best walking on runways, hmm?”

 

“Instead of doing my best, I’d rather marry someone with money.” Ryewook makes a face at the cigarette but smirks. “I don’t know. How about you marry me?”

 

“Divorce processes are always messy and costs a lot of money.” Kyungsoo pretends to think then deadpans. “No.”

 

“Well, I tried.” Ryewook shrugs then pulls out another cigarette. Kyungsoo frowns but made now move to stop him this time. “What about you and that guy err…” He lights up his stick and takes a hit, thinking. “Ah,” He blows a puff of smoke on the other direction. “Byun Baekhyun. How’s that coming along?”

 

“You mean avoiding him and pretending I’m not that fat guy who he fell in love with before? It’s going great.” Kyungsoo laughs and lays down on the bed with hands behind his head.

 

Ryewook raises a brow and takes another hit. “Well no matter how great your _plan_ is, don’t come bawling your eyes out when that guy finally gets married to his fiancé because damn son, I’m going to kick you in the nuts and shout hallelujah.” He exhales the smoke through his nose. “They’re just busy that’s why they’re delaying the wedding, but sooner or later it will come. Are you sure you can handle that?”

 

Kyungsoo sits up and chuckles.

 

No, he doesn’t think he can survive that but it’s a part of the decision he made when he ran away from everything. He expected it to come but the reality differs from the expectation so he’ll just have to brace himself.

 

“Hey do you ever wonder why I agree to be sex friends with you?”

 

Ryewook furrows his brows. “No, why? Why is that?”

 

Kyungsoo bitterly chuckles. “It’s because your back looks like Baekhyun.” He looks at the elder. “Too fucked up, isn’t it?”

 

Ryewook stares at him for a moment before breaking into a grin. “I don’t know if I should be throwing my head back laughing or strangling you to death. Yes, that is fucked up but damn, I feel used.” He ruffles Kyungsoo’s hair enough until Kyungsoo swats his hand away. “But if it makes you feel better, you can marry me if it’s too painful. Just don’t get bothered if I sleep with another person.”

 

Kyungsoo rolls his eyes and laughs. “Thanks, but no thanks.”

 

 

 

 

 

Baekhyun wakes up alone. At first, it felt dissatisfying and Baekhyun would be lying if he said it hurts. But as time passed, he got used to it. Besides, Joonmyeon always leaves a note written with an apology and words that can make him smile. Baekhyun takes off the sticky note on the lamp and softly laughs after reading it.

 

It’s a long way down from the penthouse and Baekhyun looks around with an odd sense of familiarity. Before, he feels embarrassed and a bit flustered at the looks being given to him after knowing that he just came from _Kim Joonmyeon’s_ place, but now, it was nothing but pride. Baekhyun greets the people he grew familiar with and flashes them a charming smile.

 

Another thing that Baekhyun grew accustomed to is to go at that diner around the block from his fiancé’s place.

 

It looks like those cliché diners from the west and the place is always crowded with people eating ranging from the casual ones to the business people who came here to get a quick grub before going to work. For them, it’s a place to fill their appetite. To Baekhyun, it’s a place where he gets to feel a sense of normalcy once in his life.

 

“Baekhyun, hey!” Sooyoung grins at him. “Will you be having the usual?”

 

“As always.” Baekhyun answers with a smile.

 

He sits at his usual seat and looks out the window of the diner with his chin on his palm. The busy streets of Seoul were always the same during the day. He hums and watches them, eyes following the people boredly. Then he spots one person walking past the place. Baekhyun furrows his brows, eyes wide in surprise.

 

The bell to the diner chimes.

 

“Oh, if it isn’t big shot!” Sooyoung greets in ease. “You’re back!”

 

“It’s nice to see you again, noona.”

 

“Landon?”

 

Said man stills and turns to look at him. It didn’t dawn Baekhyun what he had done not until their eyes met. Baekhyun’s heart thumps loudly that rings in his ears. He clears his throat, dismissing the sudden change of atmosphere between them. Baekhyun smiles. “It’s funny seeing you again.”

 

“Oh, yeah. Yeah, it is.” Landon, who still looks surprised, answers then turns his attention to Sooyoung. “Noona, I’ll have the B special to go. Make that two.” Sooyoung writes it on her pad then grins.

 

“Great! It’ll be up for a minute. While you do, why don’t you two catch up?” Sooyoung gives Baekhyun and Landon a knowing look. “I didn’t know you two know each other.”

 

“Ah, noona.” Baekhyun’s words fell off when Sooyoung winks at them before sashaying back to the counter, taking another man’s order when she passed. Baekhyun sighs and turns to Landon, surprised when he finds the other man staring at him. Flustered, he clears his throat. “Why don’t you uh…” He gestures to the seat in front of him. Landon smiles, nodding.

 

Landon’s stubble grew than the last time they saw each other back at London. Baekhyun tilts his head. There’s a part of him that sees Landon with a stubble silly because it’s like a baby growing a beard but there’s another part in him that finds the sight sexy and hot.

 

Landon furrows his brows and touches his jaw. “Oh,” He laughs in embarrassment. “I’ll shave later, don’t worry.”

 

“No, I was just…” Baekhyun can’t help but laugh. “It’s okay, really.” He waves in dismissal before deciding to shift the subject. “So what brings you here so early? I thought the scheduled meeting with my father is still next week?”

 

“Ah, I came early because I met up with another client. And then I went around meeting up with old acquaintances.” Landon answers. “What about you? What are you doing here?”

 

“This is the place where I frequently eat breakfast.” Baekhyun grins. “It’s uh… near my fiancé’s place. Pretty convenient, too.” He studies Landon’s face and sees him slowly nodding with a neutral expression on his face. He shifts the conversation when it feels getting awkward. “It’s a small world, don’t you think? To meet here all of the sudden.”

 

Landon hums. “You’re right. I was expecting for us to meet again in the office talking about boring stuff regarding with the construction.” He keeps checking on his phone and the action oddly irritates him. Baekhyun didn’t hold back the huff that escaped his lips before clearing his throat.

 

“So…” Baekhyun trails. “Are you perhaps seeing anyone, Landon-sshi?”

 

Landon snaps his head up to look at him. “Me?” He pursed his lips for a moment before shaking his head. “No, never.” He grins. “Dating did cross my mind not even for a moment.” Baekhyun feels some kind of relief at that until. “But I did date a few people back in London. It was a great experience. Maybe someday I’ll find someone like what your fiancé is to you. But for now, I think I’m laying low on the dating scene.”

 

Baekhyun chuckles. “Thank you very much. I hope you find that person, too.”

 

He notices it how Landon always mentions his fiancé whenever topics like this goes deep. It’s like Landon is setting up a line – something that strongly implies not to cross over unwanted territories. But for someone like Baekhyun, lines and other limitations are nothing but hindering his curiosity. Baekhyun plays with his knuckles.

 

Before he could open another topic, the food they ordered came. Sooyoung is holding a paper bag and a plate filled with Baekhyun’s order. “Sorry it took a bit long. Customers are piling up like damn, can’t even get a break.” Her grin widens when Kyungsoo took a few bills from his wallet and gives it to her. “Welp, I’m gonna go now. Holler if you need me.” She walks away after that, hips swaying as she does.

 

Landon smiles at him. “I should go now. It was nice seeing you again, Baekhyun-sshi.”

 

Baekhyun grins. “I feel the same, too.” He gives the man a small wave and watches as he exits the small diner.

 

Seeing Landon again brought many emotions in him that he finds it hard to eat at this moment. His appetite went away just like that despite feeling famished earlier this morning. Baekhyun huffs and picks up his plate then went to the counter.

 

“Hey, I’ll have this packed please.” The girl, whose name is Seohyun on the tag, nods and did that. But just when Baekhyun pulled out his wallet, Sooyoung bumps his hips and wiggles her brow.

 

“Give me some beef and tell me what’s with you and Mr. Charming over there?” Sooyoung grins cheekily. “You dated? Is that? Is he one of your exes?”

 

“No!” Baekhyun blushes furiously. “I just met him back at London.”

 

“Oh, life.” Sooyoung sighs dramatically. “How come when you already answered the popped question, attractive men came piling in? Totally unfair! Right, Seo?”

 

Seohyun silently hands him his paper bag then bows after she received Baekhyun’s payment. “Thank you for coming. Please come again soon.”

 

“Aish, this girl. Why are you ignoring me?”

 

“Look, I should go.” Baekhyun chuckles uneasily. “I’ll come back next time, alright?”

 

"Oh, you better!” Sooyoung grins and waves.

 

Baekhyun sighs as he exits the diner. He swore that woman is acting like an old lady already thirsty for some gossips to satisfy her. He turns to the corner but stops midway when he sees Landon talking to someone inside a car. The other person’s face is leaning rather close and Landon doesn’t make any move to move away. Baekhyun furrows his brows.

 

He sees Landon’s lips moving – he’s saying something before he starts the car and drives away.

 

Baekhyun frowns.

 

Who was that guy?

 

 

 

 

 

“Oh, Yesung’s getting divorced. Can you believe it?” Jongdae gaps in disbelief. “Who would have thought? I thought his marriage was perfect!” He did a double take when he notices Baekhyun isn’t watching the TV with him. “Yah.”

 

Baekhyun is silent for a moment before letting out a heavy sigh. Jongdae rolls his eyes.

 

“Look, I don’t know what’s your problem with this whole Landon Park is actually Do Kyungsoo theory but I’m here to tell you that that theory of yours is false.” Now this has Baekhyun’s attention. Jongdae continues. “Look here.” He picks up a magazine under the glass coffee table. He flips the pages until he reaches a half-body shot of Landon Park and his alluring gaze. Baekhyun wants to swoon but he remembers what he saw at the car making him whimper instead. “Landon Park is sooooo not Do Kyungsoo. Just looking at this picture explains it all!”

 

Baekhyun looks at Jongdae, confused. “And that is because?”

 

Jongdae points at the picture. “He’s not fat.”

 

“Maybe he worked out. It’s been 11 years after all.”

 

“He’s a bit tall. Kyungsoo isn’t tall.”

 

“You didn’t notice because he was wide then, but Kyungsoo is actually a bit tall. Not taller than you, but tall enough compared to girls.”

 

“Plus, look at this face.” Jongdae gestures. “Does this look like Do Kyungsoo to you? Landon Park is like… Jo Jungsuk in the flesh!”

 

“Excuse me, but Kyungsoo was handsome then!” Baekhyun pulls up his knees and whimpers pathetically. “He still looks handsome, to be honest.” He groans. “I want to see him so bad.”

 

“This.” Jongdae whacks his head with the magazine rolled up. Baekhyun yelps. “This is what I hate about you whenever we talk about that stupid Do Kyungsoo! You suddenly act like this. This isn’t right!” Baekhyun’s eyes went wide when Jongdae shakes his shoulders. “You’re going back to your obsessive ways! Wake up, Byun. Wake up!”

 

“But Landon is really Kyungsoo!”

 

Jongdae squints his eyes. “Do you even have any proof?”

 

Baekhyun slumps. “I just… I just got this feeling that he is.”

 

“Well, that isn’t useful.” Jongdae folds his arms against his chest. “Plus, you’re getting married soon. We don’t know when you two will decide to tie the knot already, but it will come soon so instead of whining about your failed love life, why don’t you focus on Joonmyeon? It’s so unfair to him, you know.”

 

Baekhyun sighs. “I-I know.” He buries his face in his hands. “I know, I’m sorry. It’s just…” He looks at Jongdae. “All I want is closure. I don’t think I can move on without closing this chapter of my life.”

 

 

 

 

 

Kyungsoo sits on the café, quietly sipping on his coffee when he hears the door chime.

 

“Landon!”

 

He shifts his stare at the man approaching him with a huge smile. Then with a smile of his own, he stands up. The man opens his arms and wraps him in a tight embrace. “Oh, goodness. It’s been so long since I last saw you! How have you been, buddy? Haven’t seen my best friend for like what – years already?”

 

There’s always a reason why he needs to put a line between him and Baekhyun.

 

Kyungsoo chuckles softly. “I’m doing great, Joonmyeon.”

 

And this was the reason.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> unbeta'd (as always)


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He lied. He doesn’t have anything to do. Damn, he already finished everything back when he’s still at home in London. If anything, he needed a breather to calm his troubled thoughts due to his conversation with Joonmyeon. He needs to keep himself in check – convince himself that what he did was a great decision. But why…

 

The coffee is sweet and warm against his tongue as he listens to Joonmyeon talk about what’s happening at work. How his mother is pressuring him about his daily life and his father getting on his case about the family business.

 

“So changing the topic, wow.” Joonmyeon looks at him from head to toe. “You look amazing. You were like a skeleton before and now, you’re like… wow.” Kyungsoo quietly sips his coffee and smiles.

 

“College was draining, you and I both know that.” 

 

“If anything but, I got fatter when I was still in college. Stress eating used to be my way of finding comfort.” They shared a laugh at this. Joonmyeon takes a quick sip before sighing at the warmness of the coffee. “But really, though. It’s good to see you again.”

 

“It’s not like we haven’t been keeping in touch, hyung.” Kyungsoo grins. “Stop being so dramatic.”

 

“Which is like twice a month. Landon, come on.” Joonmyeon chuckles. “Are you living in a cave or something? Like what the hell? How come your replies falls 3 weeks late? Maybe…” He places his cup down and wiggles his brows suggestively. “Have you been _busy_?”

“If there’s anything I’m too busy to focus on, it’s definitely not what you’re thinking.” Kyungsoo waves in dismissal but the teasing glint in Joonmyeon’s eyes makes him laugh. “No, seriously. Dad had been piling up work and sometimes I had to help Chanyeol with his clients. Dating hasn’t been good for me.”

 

Joonmyeon hums with a disapproving frown. “I don’t believe you.” Kyungsoo shakes his head, chuckling. “No, listen. I don’t believe you, you know why? Because even if you’re busy as fuck, if you want to date someone, you’d make it work. I mean, come on. Look at me and Baekhyun.”

 

Kyungsoo stiffens upon hearing the name.

 

“Sure we work a lot and there are times when we don’t see each other for a week. But in the middle of those days, we communicate and meet each other halfway. Put up a lot of effort just to make that spark still burning, you know what I mean?” Joonmyeon beams. “Look at us now. 4 years in and we’re still doing great!”

 

Kyungsoo quickly takes a huge drink of his coffee, wincing at the taste of sudden bitterness surrounding his tongue. Joonmyeon seems to be oblivious at the sudden change of atmosphere because he’s still talking about him and his _fiancé_. He plasters the best smile to his friend.

 

“We’re just waiting for the right time now to move ahead with the ceremony.” Joonmyeon leans on his back against the chair and looks down at the silver band on his finger. His eyes are twinkling in happiness. “Maybe I’d ask you to be my best man.”

 

Kyungsoo hums. “I don’t know. I’ll probably be back at London busy with work.”

 

“Too busy to even make time to go to your best friend’s wedding?”

 

The conversation is already making him uncomfortable but he forces himself to be playful and teasing despite the burn he’s feeling on the back of his eyes.

 

“Super busy.” He grins. “But I could make room for it in my schedule only if you beg.”

 

Joonmyeon laughs. “I’ll make sure to schedule an appointment then.”

 

 

 

 

 

Baekhyun groggily yawns upon entering the elevator. It’s a long ride up at his flat and it’s not helping that the music being played inside is a lazy version of happy birthday. Baekhyun sighs heavily and fixed his eyes on the door with that same bored look he wears every day.

 

There are a total of four rooms in every floor. Even if it’s big enough for two and quite small, Baekhyun still considers the place home. His parents never approved of his place and even preferred for him to move in to Joonmyeon’s place. But Baekhyun is a grown man now, he can decide everything for himself. It was a good thing Joonmyeon respects his decisions. Thank the heavens he got lucky.

 

Baekhyun takes his card key from his wallet as he approaches only to stop halfway when he sees a familiar face exiting the door opposite of his flat. He furrowed his brows, confused on what the react.

 

“Landon?”

 

Landon, who’s wearing a loose shirt and sweatpants, did a double-take when their eyes met. His eyes looks twice as big wearing those thick-rimmed glasses. He blinks rapidly. “Baekhyun-sshi?”

 

Baekhyun remembers the landlord telling him about the room opposite of his is owned by a person who’s always out in travels. Seeing Landon in front of him, it suddenly makes sense. “You…” He points a finger on him. “You live here?”

 

“Oh, no.” Landon waves his hands in dismissal. “This place is actually my sister’s.”

 

Ah, the newscaster.

 

“I’m staying here for the meantime while I’m here in Korea.” He said. “What about you?”

 

“Oh, I…” Baekhyun points at his flat door. “This is where I live.”

 

“Oh.” Landon shifted awkwardly before flashing him a small smile.

 

There was a long silence then, their eyes simply locked as if they couldn’t believe what was happening. Jumbled of mixed emotions coursed through them before Landon breaks the gaze by bursting into a fit of laughter. Baekhyun joined in too after finding his laugh contagious.

 

“We should really stop meeting like this.” Landon said in between laughs.

 

“If anything but, I thought you were stalking me.” Baekhyun teased making Landon scrunch his face. “I think we should change this. Uh, I…” He gestures to his place. “Do you want to go inside? I could make us some coffee or something.”

 

Landon opens his mouth to reply but stops shortly, furrowing his brows. “I… that would be great.” He answers. “But I’m busy at the moment. I just went outside to get a breather after working on something. I’m really sorry.”

 

Baekhyun would lie if he doesn’t feel disappointed upon hearing that. He didn’t let it show, however, and slowly nods instead. “I see.” He waves in dismissal. His heart is thumping nervously and his mouth is shaking as he talks. It’s always like this whenever he talks to Landon. “It’s fine. It’s fine. I’m just going to –“

 

“If I’m free, I could just knock over your door.” Landon interrupts him. “Then we could get that coffee you were offering… if it’s still okay with you.”

 

Baekhyun blinks rapidly and smiles. “That would be great. I’ll hold on to that.”

 

“Yeah, great.” Landon echoes with a smile of his own.

 

“Awesome.” Baekhyun fingers the edge of his keycard. Before the awkwardness strikes back, Baekhyun points at the door with his thumb. “I should – I should go inside. You know, I mean – I’m still going to –“

 

“Yeah, yeah.” Landon chuckles. “Break time is over for me so I should probably head inside, too.” He slowly takes a few steps back, their eyes never leaving each other. “Good night, Baekhyun-sshi.”

 

“Just…” Baekhyun clears his throat. “Just Baekhyun is fine.”

 

“Okay.” Landon enters his flat and has his hand around the knob. He looks at Baekhyun with both brows raised and a grin. “Good night, Baekhyun.”

 

Baekhyun smiles and watches as Landon closes the door, the sound of the lock clicking echoing the hallway. But as soon as he was gone, that smile fell in a sigh. Baekhyun approaches his door and swipes the card and successfully opening the door. Before entering, he cranes his neck to look at the door again.

 

 _“Good night, Kyungsoo.”_ Baekhyun whispers.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Kyungsoo drags a hand down his face.

 

He lied. He doesn’t have anything to do. Damn, he already finished everything back when he’s still at home in London. If anything, he needed a breather to calm his troubled thoughts due to his conversation with Joonmyeon. He needs to keep himself in check – convince himself that what he did was a great decision. But why…

 

Is the deity really that cruel to him?

 

Kyungsoo ruffles his hair and picks up the remote when he passed by the coffee table. He turned on the TV and settles on HBO, choosing to drown his thoughts by distracting himself from watching an unfamiliar movie. But even then, his head kept drifting away.

 

“Godfuckingdammit.” Kyungsoo mutters under his breath before taking his phone.

 

_Why of all places did you choose to stay here?_

He sent the message to his elder sister on Line. The message got a reply a quick second later, meaning, Yoora’s probably awake somewhere wherever she is. She never did tell the family where she goes. Or rather, she only tells their mother. Kyungsoo sighs and takes his eyes off of the TV to look down at the message pop-up on his screen.

 

**_Because the rent’s cheap and it’s close to where I work before. Duh._ **

**_It’s not like you were complaining before. What’s the problem now?_ **

****

_My fucking ex lives opposite of this place and it’s freaking me out._

Kyungsoo furrows his brows and deletes the message.

 

  _Hey, remember that guy I told you when I began to spout nonsense shit when I was drunk? Yeah, turns out he lives opposite of this place. Hooray!_

He aggressively deletes the message with a huff.

 

_My best friend’s fiancé is living opposite of this place and I’m still in love with that guy! That’s my problem!_

Kyungsoo tosses his phone on the coffee table and groans in frustration as he lets himself fall on the sofa, face hitting on the pillow. It didn’t take long after that, however, Kyungsoo quickly stands up and gets his phone, which landed on the velvet carpet after he tossed it, then types in a reply.

 

_It’s nothing. I’m just bored._

**_Want me to send a message to Chanyeol?_ **

****

He remembers when Chanyeol and he stayed here together because of that project that they were teaming up before. Not only did he didn’t get enough sleep, he did certain type of things that are deemed one of the most embarrassing moments of his life. Never again, Kyungsoo. Never again.

 

_Please, no. I’m fine._

**_Then stop complaining and do your job properly._ **

**_And call mom when you have the time. Don’t forget._ **

****

_Okay, okay. Goodnight._

Yoora didn’t reply after that. It was such a Yoora thing to do to seen the message and then doesn’t reply even if she’s being asked with a question. As long as it wasn’t important – to her, at least. Kyungsoo huffs and places his phone on the coffee table. He closes his eyes and puts his hands in his head.

 

“Keep calm, Park Landon.” He whispers. “You can do this.”

 

_Everything’s going to be okay._

 

 

 

 

 

_“Wake up, Mr. Byun~ you’re needed here to give a speech for the newcomers this month.”_

Baekhyun groans when he hears Luhan’s voice on telephone followed by a sharp beep. He drags a hand down on his face and picks his phone, squinting at the big 6 and 05 digits on his screen along with 4 missed calls from said secretary. He groans again before dragging himself off the bed.

 

He pressed play on the telephone on the way to the bathroom when he sees a few other voice messages.

 

 _“Good morning, sunshine.”_ Joonmyeon’s gentle voice fills the room making him smile midway washing his face. _“I’m going to be busy the whole day so unfortunately I won’t be taking any calls. Sad, I know, and no text messages either. Sexting in the middle of the meeting is not cool, Baek.”_

 

Baekhyun makes a face upon hearing that. “Aw, boo.”

 

 _“I just wanted to say I love you to start the day. I’ll be seeing you tomorrow!”_ The message ended with a sharp beep. Baekhyun slowly shakes his head with a smile while he brushes his teeth.

 

After cleaning himself and checking if he wore his work suit correctly, he opened the door of his flat and was ready to leave only to stop when he sees Landon just in the middle of leaving. They stood there, eyes wide, in an awkward stance.

 

Contradicting his attire, Landon is wearing casual clothes, his phone on his other hand and glasses perched loosely on his nose. He looks like he’s going out for something. Baekhyun couldn’t hide his curiosity but instead gives him a smile in greeting.

 

“Good morning.”

 

“Oh,” Landon quickly takes off his glasses. “Good morning, Baekhyun.”

 

“Going out today, huh?” Baekhyun chuckles softly as he locked the door to his apartment. “It’s a nice day, too. I envy you.”

 

“Oh, yes. I was planning on visiting a few places.” Landon said. He stuffs his hands inside his coat pocket and looks at him, waiting for him. “I see you’re going to work today. That’s nice.” Landon began walking towards the hallway to the elevator. Baekhyun follows closely behind.

 

He scoffs a laugh. “What’s so nice about going to work?”

 

“A sense of accomplishment whenever you get things done.” Landon presses the button. Together, they wait for the elevator, staring at the monitor on top. “I try to find things that’s positive when it comes to work. Gives me some kind of motivation or something.”

 

“Ah, maybe it’s because what you do is your passion, Landon.” Baekhyun enters the elevator once it stopped and opens with Landon following. Landon presses to the Ground floor. “What I do, however, isn’t what I want. It’s more of like, I was forced to do this out because I have no choice.”

 

When Kyungsoo left, the sense of direction Baekhyun has in his life was gone. For long he had envisioned a future with him and now that he’s gone, there’s nothing left but darkness. Call it poetic, but it’s true. Like whenever Baekhyun’s asked what he sees in the future, there’s nothing but a blank slate. So like a puppet, he agreed on whatever his parents had told him on what to do. He’s convinced that maybe doing what they’d like might trigger his sense back – make him snap back to reality.

 

“You say like it’s because you have no choice but I can see how you’re good at your job.” Landon said, cutting his thoughts. Baekhyun turns to look at him. “To be honest, my profession wasn’t my first choice but like you, I have no choice either. Even though there’s no choice, it’s still your decision whether you will learn to love it or not.” Landon gives him a half-smile.

 

Baekhyun stills at that boyish look, a complete 360 degrees turn of that Landon Park you see on magazines. He looks carefree here, a bit innocent and Baekhyun would lie if he didn’t felt his heart skip a beat that moment. He mentally mutters a curse.

 

“So you should find something to look forward to. Dwelling on negativity won’t do you any good.” Landon hums and steps out of the elevator after it opens.

 

Come to think of it, Landon is right. Work has been something Baekhyun doesn’t look forward to and sometimes he would skip and frolic around Joonmyeon’s apartment so that his parents would let it slide (because duh, it’s Joonmyeon. Who could even get mad at the guy?) If he could find some motivation in going to work, then maybe he could get rid of a bit of negativity in his life.

 

Baekhyun follows Landon out. “Hey, thank –“

 

“Oh, god. You are so fucking late!”

 

The two of them stills when they saw a person sitting casually on the lobby, leg on top of the other. He has dark shades perched up on his nose and the way dresses can make any person swoon. However, his attitude might have been such a turn off. Baekhyun furrows his brows in confusion.

 

Landon blinks rapidly. “What are you doing here?”

 

“I told you, I’d be waiting at my place in seven, but no.” The man struts towards Landon. “So change of plans, I’m coming here to get you instead.” He stops midway when he **finally** notices Baekhyun. He has this frown on his face then he stills for a moment before flashing a smug smirk.

 

Wait, what?

 

“I’m upset.” The man coos at Landon, holding his hand. “Comfort me.”

 

“Look, I think we should –“

 

It was as if everything is in slow motion. The man pulls Landon’s face close and kisses him square on the lips. Right. In. Front. Of. Him. Like. What? The kiss didn’t last long because Landon broke it a few seconds in.

 

Baekhyun clears his throat rather loudly. “I should go.”

 

“W-Wait, I –“

 

“I’m going to be late.” Baekhyun grits. “Have a nice day, Park-sshi.” He didn’t even bat an eye at the other man and speed walks his way out of the place and into his car and driving down the road and stopping in the red light and getting out of his car to bang his head on the nearest lamp post. Wait, no…

 

He’s still inside his car and his fingers are shaking on the wheel.

 

So much for lessening the negativity in his life.

 

 

 

 

 

Afterhours, Baekhyun refused to go home, not wanting to see Landon again after that encounter earlier this morning. Especially with the way how these _coincidences_ are starting to piss him off. So instead, he’s camping in Jongdae’s place.

 

“Hey, what’s with the face?” Jongdae frowns. “You’re ruining the mood here.”

 

Baekhyun furrows his brows. “Why? What does my face look like?”

 

“Borderline crying with a bit of constipation.”

 

Baekhyun makes a face at him and turns around, rolling himself on the carpet and makes a sound that’s close to a whale moaning in agony. “Leave me alone, Jongdae. I’m channeling my inner emo and sulk in the corner.” He sniffles. “I should have brought my hoodie.”

 

Jongdae rolls his eyes at his friend and shifts his attention back at the TV. “Oh, damn. People do love to feed on other’s misery.”

 

_Love songs be damned. Singer Yesung and beau, Kim Ryeowook are reported to be filing a divorce. Netizens are shocked at the news especially how high profiled their relationship is to the world._

“That news again?” Baekhyun groans. “Ugh.”

 

Jongdae slaps his thigh to shut him up.

 

_The married couple continues to deny on-going rumors about the reason for their divorce. However, sources say that reason for their separation is because of a third party._

Baekhyun clicks his tongue in distaste. “Hey, would you keep it down?” He rolls to the side, facing the TV. “I’m trying to wallow myself in…” His eyes shifted at the TV for a brief moment, only to do a double take. “…misery.”

 

The guy on the picture beside the singer is none other than the same person he saw this morning. Baekhyun blinks rapidly and slowly pushes himself to sit up.

 

“Aw, poor guy.” Jongdae hums. “Now I know why Minseok’s so pissed lately. He’s even forcing me to go to that guy’s concert to support him. Die-hard fans, right?” He sighs. “Anyways, you coming with? I don’t want to be the only one in pain.”

 

“I…” Baekhyun gapes like a fish and points at the screen. “I know that person.”

 

“Huh?” Jongdae looks at the TV and sees a woman parading herself on the beach holding a bottle of shampoo. “Oh, I know her, too. She’s Selena Gomez, right?”

 

“No!” Baekhyun quickly sits beside Jongdae, startling the guy. “That person Yesung is getting divorced to. I know who he is.”

 

“Of course, everyone knows him. He’s a –“

 

“Jongdae!” Baekhyun interrupts. “I know him because I saw him this morning.”

 

Jongdae blinks rapidly upon hearing that. Slowly, his jaw slackens. “You’re kidding, right?”

 

“I wish I was kidding, but no. I saw him and he kissed Landon Park straight in the mouth right in my fucking face, Jongdae.” Baekhyun huffs, exasperated. “Right in my fucking face! And – And you heard about the rumors, right? Just in that news it says that the reason for their separation is because of a third party. Fucking hell!”

 

Jongdae gapes in mock horror and drops his act to give him a deadpanned look. “So you look like a guy borderline crying with a bit of constipated look because you saw Kim Ryeowook kissed Landon Park in front of you? Wow, Baekhyun. Wow.” He furrows his brows. “What the hell is he even doing with you?”

 

Baekhyun’s eyes went wide. Shit.

 

“Well, uh…” He gives a small grin. “Remember that room opposite of my place?” Jongdae nods. “Apparently it’s his sisters and currently, he’s staying there for the meantime.”

 

Jongdae clamps his eyes shut. “Oh, god.”

 

“But that’s not the point!” Baekhyun waves his hands in dismissal. “After what I’ve seen, that must mean that the rumor about the third party is true! Landon Park is that Ryeowook guy’s male equivalent of mistress or something!”

 

“A boy toy?”

 

Baekhyun snaps his fingers. “Exactly!”

 

Jongdae raised a brow. “And?”

 

“Kyungsoo isn’t like that.” Baekhyun deflates immediately. “Kyungsoo is too innocent to be someone’s boy toy. That’s not…” He pulls his legs up and pressed them against his chest. “That’s not possible.”  He drags his teeth on his lower lip and shakes his teeth. “No. Landon Park can’t be Kyungsoo.”

 

“I don’t know.” Jongdae leans backwards until his back hits the leather sofa. He smirks at Baekhyun. “I thought you were so adamant on insisting that Landon is Kyungsoo.”

 

“It was just a feeling!”

 

“Well, are you sure about _this_ feeling now?”

 

“I don’t know…” Baekhyun runs his fingers through his hair and sighs. “I’m so confused.”

 

 

 

 

 

**< < rewind**

 

Kyungsoo gave Ryeowook a glare when they entered the car. “What the fuck was that for?”

 

Ryeowook played innocent and bites his finger, making goo-goo eyes at him. “A good morning kiss?” Kyungsoo cringed and starts the car, still with a frown. The older male laughs. “But admit it, it felt good doing that in front of that guy. He looked affected.”

 

“No,” Kyungsoo mutters. “He’s not. He’s far from affected. That’s not possible.”

 

“How can you be so sure?”

 

“I’m 100% percent sure.” Kyungsoo pulls from the driveway and turns left towards their destination while trying to ignore Ryeowook’s smug grin. “You should be driving not me. This is your car.”

 

“But you were the one entered the driver seat, I just assumed.” Kyungsoo groans. “Don’t worry. I’ll be a useful navigator, love.” Ryeowook cackles when Kyungsoo mutters about him falling asleep on the way followed by a string of curses. “Hey, Kyungsoo. Come on, don’t lie.” He leans his head on his knuckles and grins. “It felt good, right?”

 

There was a long silence before Kyungsoo mumbles.

 

“Whatever his reaction might be doesn’t concern me anymore.” He said. “So stop doing any means of getting my hopes up.”

 

Ryeowook’s playful demeanor fell upon hearing that. He withdraws his head and leans back on the seat with his lips curled in a pout. “Fine. I’m sorry.” He sighs and turns the radio up instead to fill in the silence looming in the car.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> unbeta'd (as always)


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Baekhyun froze the moment he sees Landon just in the middle of walking towards his apartment door. His fingers shake around the knob and his heart thundered violently. He has half a mind to close the door and half a mind to march up there and slap his face for utterly no reason at all but that would be weird so Baekhyun chose the first option.
> 
>  
> 
> Baekhyun looks down and pulls the door close.

“We’re having a baby!”

 

Pops the champagne and bubbles bursting out of the green bottle. A series of congratulations rains down the happy couple in the middle. Immediately, others flock around the said girl that is pregnant while others smacks the man extra hard on the back for a job well done.

 

Amidst the celebration, Kyungsoo is sitting beside Ryeowook, who was watching everything. When Kyuhyun, the soon-to-be father met his eyes, he beams and waves at him. Ryewook waves back with a small smile on his face. Kyungsoo knew Kyuhyun as Ryewook one of many exes. And among the bitter and messy breakups he had, Kyuhyun was the one he remained friends with.

 

“Wow, I’m so happy for them, really.” Ryeowook said. “Like Kyuhyun is really lucky for finding someone like Sungmin. They’re really great together.” He chuckles. “I wonder when I will find the husband perfect for me.”

 

“Maybe you’ll find someone if you could just stop screwing around with everybody else while your husband’s away.” Kyungsoo rolls his eyes. “Look at what’s going on with you currently. This is by far the biggest scandal that you’ve ever been in.”

 

“And maybe you’ll find yours too if you’d stop being a child.” Ryeowook counters. He has this easy smile on his face like he’s not taking this conversation seriously but he knows that the older male is testing his patience. “Baekhyun is literally served in the platter right in front of you and you’re acting like this prissy kid who doesn’t want to eat it even if you’re hungry.”

 

Kyungsoo hisses. “I am not talking about this with you.”

 

“You started it.” Ryeowook singsongs. “I’m not the only one with a messy love life.”

 

“Shut up.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

The next afternoon, they found themselves in the same situation only this time, it’s reversed.

 

Baekhyun froze the moment he sees Landon just in the middle of walking towards his apartment door. His fingers shake around the knob and his heart thundered violently. He has half a mind to close the door and half a mind to march up there and slap his face for utterly no reason at all but that would be weird so Baekhyun chose the first option.

 

Baekhyun looks down and pulls the door close.

 

“Wait, Baekhyun!”

 

Baekhyun stills and looks up at him dumbly, “W-What?”

 

“About that coffee.” Landon trails. Baekhyun’s heart is murdering his rib cage. “If I told you I’d knock on your door right now, would you let me in?”

 

Baekhyun opens his mouth to say something but then stops when he finds no words coming out so in the end, he just closed it. Seeing his reaction made Landon’s face fell, but that hopeful look on his face came back when Baekhyun went inside without closing the door, indicating that he wants Landon to follow him.

 

“Calm down, Byun.” Baekhyun mutters to himself as he makes his way to the kitchen. “Calm the fuck down.”

 

 

 

 

 

Baekhyun enters the small living room holding two mugs of coffee. He sees Landon sitting on the carpet and his back leaning against the green bean bag while he plays with something on his phone. He furrows his brows. “Why aren’t you sitting on the bean bag?”

 

Landon jolts upon hearing that and snaps his head up to look at him. “I… just thought the carpet looked so… comfy?”

 

“Oh.” Baekhyun gently places the mugs on top of the coffee table and takes his place in the middle, sitting on the brown carpet. He can feel Landon’s eyes on him and that alone made him feel nervous but he forced himself to look calm and looks at him with a smile. “Here you go.” He pushes one mug towards him. “Hope you like it.”

 

“Oh, uh… thank you.” Landon bows his head upon receiving it before taking it in his hand. He winced when he accidentally holds the body instead of the handle.

 

Cue in the long awkward silence.

 

It was silent, no music, and all they do is drink their coffee and talk. Baekhyun would have wanted to, you know, talk but then every time he would look at Landon his mind goes back to what happened yesterday and that kiss and it makes his blood boil and…

 

Baekhyun is afraid that he might say something… embarrassing.

 

After taking a quick sip, Landon looks at him and grins. “Do you always look like this?”

 

Baekhyun turns to him with a brow raised. “What do you mean?”

 

“You look like…” He gestures to his face. “Like you’re trying not to fart or something.”

 

Baekhyun scoffs a laugh. How dare he…?

 

“Well, this face happens to be likeable.” Baekhyun said. “It’s a part of top 50 most desirable bachelors in the world. I thought you read magazines?”

 

“I didn’t know those constipated expressions are a trend here in Korea.”

 

“Hey, I wasn’t.” Baekhyun pouts. “I wasn’t making that face.” He looks at Landon when he cracks a laugh, his face scrunched up in amusement.

 

Baekhyun bites his lower lip and chuckles.

 

There was another long silence, but this time it wasn’t awkward like before.

 

“Look, I…” Landon clears his throat and continues. “What happened yesterday wasn’t… what you thought it was.” He traces the handle of the white mug. “His name is Kim Ryeowook and he’s in the middle of getting a divorce with his husband.”

 

“Everyone knows that. It’s all over the news.” Baekhyun feigns nonchalance. “And why are you even telling me this? It doesn’t concern me.”

 

“But I just wanted to make things clear, alright?” Landon utters. “From the very start, Ryeowook-hyung is really like that. He likes to tease people, play jokes with them... It’s what he does.” He gestures with his hands. “Ryeowook-hyung and I are simply just friends.” He lifts his mug and drinks his coffee.

 

Baekhyun scoffs a laugh. “Well, if you consider a kiss as a greeting between friends then would you like me to kiss you right now?”

 

Landon chokes on his drink.

 

Baekhyun’s eyes went wide.

 

What the fuck?

 

“Oh my god, I was just…” Baekhyun rushes over to get the tissue box from table near the TV. Landon takes it and immediately covers his mouth when it was handed to him. “I’m sorry! It j-just…” His heart throbs against his chest and he can’t help the sudden heat rising up to his face. “It w-was a-at the heat of the moment! I didn’t k-know what I was saying.”

 

“Pfft…”

 

Landon threw his head back and bursts out laughing.

 

Like a full-blown laugh, mouth wide and everything.

 

Just the sight made Baekhyun’s lips curled involuntarily – and he tried to suppress it as his cheeks swelled and his face reddening even more – but it was futile. His laughter came out, louder than he had expected.

 

Landon wipes the corner of his eyes. “Seriously, Baekhyun.” He chuckles. “Seriously.”

 

Hearing those words hits him with a wave of nostalgia.

 

Hearing those words again took him back to high school – up at the rooftop with Kyungsoo after class hours, escaping the judging stares and hurtful whispers passed around – but remembering it at this moment doesn’t trigger that usual ache in his heart.

 

“You remind me of my first love, Landon.” He said in a daze.

 

Landon’s chuckles melts into a thoughtful expression.

 

“What…was he like?” He asked.

 

Baekhyun pursed his lips. “He’s a big oaf with a giant heart.” He grins. “And he has this huge amount of love for food like… he loves it so much, he doesn’t care even if his pants won’t fit anymore.”

 

Landon looks down and smiles. “Really?”

 

“He makes me feel…” Baekhyun drums his fingers on the table and sighs. “Like a kid when he hears that familiar song of his favorite ice cream stand, when he comes in mind, I feel just like that – my heart automatically beats for him.” He bites his lower lip and chuckles. “It might be just a first love for someone and it might be just another memory to forget for another, but for me, it’s something that I can’t forget for the rest of my life.”

 

Landon is looking at him with eyes he can’t read. He didn’t blink and in the depths of his gaze, Baekhyun finds himself wanting more. He needs to know more of that there is to Park Landon.

 

“I hope you find him someday.”

 

And Baekhyun hopes that too.

 

 

 

 

 

 

In the middle of watching Tron, Kyungsoo sees Baekhyun already dozing off. He has his head lolling forward, his lips parted where soft snores were heard. Kyungsoo turns fully to look at him.

 

He recalls the things that Baekhyun had said – how his expression were soft and endearing. And hearing those coming from him makes his walls break. Baekhyun is missing him. Baekhyun is looking for him. Baekhyun is… Baekhyun is…

 

“I’m here, Baekhyun-ah.” Kyungsoo whispers, slowly reaching out to hold his hand. “Right in front of you, I’m here.”

 

He shuts his watering eyes tight and retracts his hand, willing the painful clench in his chest to go away.

 

 

 

 

 

It happened during Baekhyun’s birthday party.

 

Mrs. Byun taps him on the shoulder and asked if she could spare a bit of time to talk with him. Kyungsoo nods without hesitation because of course, who wouldn’t say no to her? Their first meeting was met with good results. It’s only natural for Kyungsoo to instantly feel close to her.

 

“Come, let’s talk here.” Mrs. Byun opens the door and lets him in. Kyungsoo bows his head before taking a step inside, only to stop midway when he sees the person sitting on the couch in the middle.

 

“M-Mr. Byun.” Kyungsoo bows his head in greeting. “Good evening, sir. I –“

 

“Let’s cut to the chase, kid.” Mr. Byun raised his brows. “I don’t like you.”

 

All of the sudden, the room suddenly turned heavy. It’s like a full-blown weight has been dropped on his back with no warning. Kyungsoo stiffens upon hearing this and slowly lifts his head to look at the elder man. “E-Excuse me, sir?” 

 

“See that party going downstairs?” Mr. Byun gruffly said. “The people there are all important people. People included in high societies and high ranks – people with money, boy. Do you have money?”

 

Kyungsoo opens his mouth shakily. “I – uh…”

 

“Of course, you don’t.” He scoffs a laugh. He points a finger at him and clicks his tongue in disappointment. “I know you. You and your family are nothing but a mere speck of dust in this society. You know this and yet, you have the gall to come show your face here and let yourself be introduced as my son’s boyfriend.”

 

There was nothing but shame and embarrassment circling his mind. No words came out despite millions of thoughts. Kyungsoo could only lower his head, afraid to meet the older’s eyes.

 

“Break up with him.”

 

Kyungsoo snaps his head up, not even hesitating to protest. “This is what your son wants.” He said, through gritted teeth despite the aggressive pounding of his heart in fear. “This is what _we_ both want. You have no right to –“

 

“Do you ever wonder why I know your family? Do you, boy?” Mr. Byun cocks a brow at him interrupting his words. When Kyungsoo didn’t reply, he continues. “Your father was the son of a well-known five star hotel located at Hawaii. He was engaged to marry someone but instead chose to marry your mother. He was disowned because of that.”

 

Kyungsoo’s eyes went wide in disbelief. “I-I don’t believe you.”

 

“I have the records here, if you want to see. I even know your grandfather.” Mr. Byun waves in dismissal. “But that’s not important, anyways. Besides, we’ve already talked with Baekhyun – me and my wife. Give him some sense, you know? But he still chose you. He wants to live with you. He wants to pursue music. He’s going against everything we want for him!” Mr. Byun’s voice rises in every sentence. “All because of you!”

 

“So we have no choice but to disown him.”

 

Kyungsoo looks at Mrs. Byun, but the woman’s sudden turn of attitude is frightening because the warm smile isn’t there no more. What’s left is the judging gaze she’s giving him like she’s looking down on him.

 

Money is always a problem in Kyungsoo’s family. His father isn’t faring well working at the fish market and just remembering her mother’s bruised fingers from doing the laundry of her customers just to get paid. In front of him, they were happy and giving him encouraging smiles but Kyungsoo sometimes hears his mother crying because of their misfortune and his father hushing her in comfort.

 

Then he pictures himself with Baekhyun. With no money, Baekhyun won’t get to the university he’s always dreamed of entering. There will be no apartment either. They’ll have to work instead to get by. And then, he will see Baekhyun cry at nights because of their misfortune and Kyungsoo doesn’t want to see that. He doesn’t want that.

 

Kyungsoo’s lips trembles, his fists clenched.

 

“G-Give me time. I’ll… I’ll leave.” He whispers. “Just like you wanted so please… d-don’t.”

 

Mr. Byun hums. “It’s great that you have more sense, boy.” He scoffs a laugh a grunts. “Besides, you two are still kids. You’ll get over it.

 

No, Kyungsoo thought, he probably won’t. But he kept that inside and looks down, fighting back the tears from coming.

 

“Now leave.” Mr. Byun said in his gruff voice. “This will be the last time you will show your face in front of me.”

 

Without even thinking, Kyungsoo turns on his heels and leaves the room, a sob ready to escape his throat. There are laughs coming from downstairs and he knows Baekhyun is there with his friends – having fun.

 

He turns around and sees himself alone in the hallway. No one to run to and no one to be with him. He sees himself alone and thinks that yes, from the start it’s always been like this. In this world, there is no such thing as allies. No one to trust other than himself.

 

Kyungsoo messily wipes the tears on his eyes with the back of his hand. “I’m okay.” He looks up and takes shaky breathes. “I-I’m okay.”

 

He can do this.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Joonmyeon furrows his brows as he looks at the variety of necklaces in different shapes and sizes. There’s a tear-shaped one and a heart-shaped one. There’s also a circle etched with beautiful designs. He pursed his lips and hums, mindlessly tapping on the glass.

 

“Hey, Jongdae. What do you think I should get for Baekhyun?”

 

Jongdae makes a face when he sees how expensive the jewelries are. “I don’t know.” He moves to glass case. “Pick whatever you like. You’re the fiancé.”

 

“Well, you’re the best friend. You know him best.”

 

Jongdae hums and approaches him. He looks at the array of necklaces that the saleswoman showed him. “They’re all good, though. But why exactly do you want to buy another for him? Didn’t you like, bought him a few ones in the past?”

 

“Ah, yeah.” Joonmyeon sighs. “But he still keeps on wearing that old necklace he has.”

 

Jongdae playfully rolls his eyes. “Of course, he would. It’s a gift from his first love, after all. He literally would carry that around him and would freak when he thought he lost it.” He sniggers. “I remembered when I played a prank on him, he got so mad when –“

 

“Wait, you mean that old necklace of his is an old gift from his first love?”

 

Jongdae blinks twice. “Didn’t… you know?”

 

Joonmyeon shakes his head. “This is the first time I’ve heard of this.”

 

Jongdae inhales sharply and puts a hand on his mouth. He tries to look away as if escaping the intriguing look Joonmyeon is giving him. He gulps hard.

 

Oh, god.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> #emokyungsooisontheloose


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Baekhyun is still wearing that necklace and he treats it like a treasure. He goes mad when he thinks he lost it and he would panic whenever he can’t find it. It’s like a bridge – Jongdae once remembers Baekhyun telling him this – that keeps him connected to Kyungsoo. If he lost it, it’s like losing the only connection he has with the man and just the thought devastates him.

Jongdae didn’t know that Baekhyun never told his fiancé that the owner of the necklace was his first love. Hell, it’s already been two years since they got engaged – four if you count that Baekhyun and Joonmyeon got together - and he had expected that they knew each and everything about each other.

 

In the end, Joonmyeon never bought anything. Instead, he takes Jongdae in a café near the store. He thought that it wouldn’t be that bad, I mean, it was already in the past, but the look in Joonmyeon’s face is far from pleased. In fact, he looks upset. At this moment, he knows he fucked up big time.

 

Jelly donuts were his favorite, but somehow those sweet treats taste bitter in his tongue. Bitter in guilt.

 

“Joonmyeon,” He called his name in caution. “I know Baekhyun can be like that.” He trails. “But it’s just because he sometimes tend to not open the topic when you didn’t ask. I mean, you did ask, right?”

 

“Several times, yes.” Joonmyeon meets his eyes. “But he always changes the topic. I thought it was too sensitive to talk about that’s why I didn’t bring it up again. To actually know the reason now…” He bites the end of his finger. “I don’t know what to feel.”

 

Fucking hell, Baekhyun.

 

“But it’s in the past!” Jongdae tries to lighten up the mood, to somehow save his best friend’s ass from this dangerous situation. “Sure once upon a time he loved the guy, but now he’s with you! It’s fine.”

 

“No, it’s not.” Joonmyeon is frustrated and the sight has Jongdae reeling back. Finally realizing the sudden rise of his voice, he sighs. “It’s not.” He whispers.

 

Baekhyun is still wearing that necklace and he treats it like a treasure. He goes mad when he thinks he lost it and he would panic whenever he can’t find it. It’s like a bridge – Jongdae once remembers Baekhyun telling him this – that keeps him connected to Kyungsoo. If he lost it, it’s like losing the only connection he has with the man and just the thought devastates him.

 

Joonmyeon’s coffee remained untouched, contradicting his cup.

 

“Sometimes, I notice how Baekhyun isn’t himself lately.” He sighs. “And it pisses me off that I don’t know why. Millions of questions ran in my head – what is the reason? Why is he acting like this? Who is making him act like this?”

 

Jongdae could only look down, feeling uneasy to look at the older male.

 

He doesn’t know what he hates the most: his mouth or his stupid best friend.

 

 

 

 

 

Baekhyun wants to drown in embarrassment. He can’t believe he fell asleep in the middle of watching the movie. Nobody should see his sleeping face – his sleeping face is a disgrace! Jongdae can attest to that and he knows Joonmyeon is just being nice whenever he says he looks cute sleeping.

 

“I’m sorry.” Baekhyun winces. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep.”

 

“It’s okay.” Landon smiles. It was a cute one, too. “I was too immersed in the movie, didn’t even notice you were sleeping.”

 

Baekhyun blinks twice. “Oh, really?” He follows Landon who is making his way towards the door. The chestnut colored-apartment door opens with a creak (Baekhyun takes note on putting a bit of oil on the hinges) and Landon takes a step out, his fingers still on the knob. “Are you sure you don’t want to stay for dinner?”

 

Landon chuckles. “I think I’m already overstaying. I don’t want to be too much of a bother.”

 

“Oh, no! There’s no such thing as overstaying, Landon.” Baekhyun waves away. “I always consider guests coming here as a treat. If you want, you could come here as much as you like. I could use the company.”

 

Now that sounds off. Baekhyun doesn’t want to appear like he’s desperate, but the way he said that to the man is almost like that. Oh, dear lord he wants the hide under a rock after saying those things. Maybe ram his head on the nearest pole until his head break, if things were in his favor, he might have amnesia and he can forget everything for –

 

Landon gives him a bright grin. “I’d like that.”

 

Oh, never mind.

 

“Okay, then.” Baekhyun clears his throat awkwardly. “I’ll see you around?”

 

“I don’t think not seeing you around is possible, judging from how many times you and I crossed paths unknowingly.” He lets go of the knob and gives him a small wave. “So yes, we’ll definitely see each other around.”

 

Baekhyun couldn’t help the giggle that comes out of his lips.

 

But the moment Landon was inside the confines of his flat, the smile on Baekhyun’s lips fell into a look of horror. If he keeps on digging deeper than this, closure isn’t the only thing he will get and just the thought makes him feel scared. However, he thinks, this too will soon pass. He just needs to know whether Landon Park and Do Kyungsoo is one and the same. That’s it.

 

Baekhyun nods to himself.

 

That’s just it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

What made him change his mind?

 

_“You know it’s not wrong to be able to feel happiness, even if it’s just a little bit.” Ryeowook said. “You told me before that even though he’s with someone else now, just being close to him is more than enough for you. But seeing you right now isn’t like what you had said to me. It’s like you’re wanting more. You’re denying it, but no matter how hard you do, it’s completely obvious.”_

_“I’m not…” Kyungsoo shakes his head. “It’s not –“_

_“Then what are you doing right now?”_

 

What is he doing right now? He doesn’t know. By now, he should be in London helping his father with his work just like the usual. He would go with Chanyeol to bars and have fun with other colleagues. He remembered promising his mother to accompany her in her shopping groceries and new clothes for Yoora – it’s been a while since she comes home and mother always prepares in case she does – and he also remembered tinkering that vintage car he bought for fun.

 

But instead, he’s here. 

 

Maybe there’s a part of him that’s secretly a masochist which is why he agreed on taking the Byun’s proposal instead of giving it to Chanyeol. Maybe there’s a part of him that needs to see the person he desperately misses and wants to see him again after a long time.  

 

Kyungsoo’s heart leaps up his throat when he sees Baekhyun just about to go out in his apartment door. He freezes when their eyes met. Baekhyun’s fingers tightens on the knob and Kyungsoo is quick to notice that. Seeing that made him panic a little that he blurts out…

 

“Wait, Baekhyun!”

 

…just in time Baekhyun was about to close the door. When he stops and looks at him, he can feel his heart drumming against his chest.

 

And maybe, there’s a part of him that wants to be with him even if it’s just for a while, even if it’s just a minute because he’s really just that greedy. But he should really know his limits – that’s the reason why the invisible line is there in the first place.

 

 

 

 

 

Baekhyun finds himself standing in front of a hotel. When his fiancé sent him a message to get ready and wait in front of his apartment building, he thinks that Joonmyeon planned another one of those _surprise_ dates he does to keep their romance burning alive, which is a great thing to do. He loves spontaneity after all.

 

And just like those cheesy romance movies, Joonmyeon is standing there at the lobby waiting for him with the most charming smile ever. His hair is slicked back with gel and he looks really good in his gray Armani suit. Baekhyun can’t help but chuckle at the sight.

 

He meets him halfway. “You’re finally here.” Joonmyeon wraps his arms around his waist and pulls him in a sweet brief kiss. Baekhyun grins.

 

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

 

“Of course.” Joonmyeon bows and offers his arm. “Shall we, then?”

 

Baekhyun immediately loops his arm around his and pulls him close, their hips bumping in the process. One of the things that Baekhyun likes about Joonmyeon is his smile – that bright grin that makes his eyes turn into crescents. It’s contagious that Baekhyun can’t help but reciprocate that with one of his own.

 

Joonmyeon lead him to their destined table – the one near the window and pink curtains – and helps him take his seat before going to the other side to sit in front of him. The waiter comes in and bows his head in greeting to welcome their arrival before telling that their order will come be coming later, meaning, Joonmyeon had probably prepared and arranged everything for it to be perfect. Typical, Joonmyeon.

 

“So…” Baekhyun looks around and gapes at the massive chandeliers around the hotel restaurant. “…what’s the occasion?”

 

Joonmyeon looks like he has been expecting that answer. Slowly, he puts his hand inside his coat and pulls out a rectangular box. The smile on Baekhyun’s face turned into a serious one when Joonmyeon places it on the table and gently pushes it towards his direction. Joonmyeon looks nervous, he notes.

 

“Baekhyun… Byun Baekhyun…” Joonmyeon calls for his name endearingly as he opens the box. It was a necklace, gold chains and a clef in the middle. The shape looks like the one he’s wearing now but even more beautiful and grand. “To the love of my life…” Baekhyun looks at Joonmyeon in surprise.

 

“That necklace you have… I know how important it is to you.” He trails. “But Baekhyun, can you wear mine from now on?”

 

Baekhyun closes his eyes and sighs.

 

 

 

 

 

Kyungsoo approaches the window to fix the blinds that got turned due to the harsh winds earlier but after pulling the strings up, he sees Baekhyun down the entrance, coming out of a black car then later followed by Joonmyeon. Kyungsoo stills.

 

Both have smiles on their faces and Joonmyeon has his hands on Baekhyun’s waist, not wanting to let go. Their lips are moving, talking about something and then Joonmyeon leans close to press their foreheads together. Kyungsoo looks away, letting go of the string to close the blinds.

 

His chest clenches and Kyungsoo has to distract himself from stopping himself to feel this way. It’s inappropriate and bad because he doesn’t have the right to feel like this, but still…

 

With his head in his hands, Kyungsoo sits on the edge of the bed and tries to block everything around him.

 

_11 years has passed since the last time I saw you. It’s only natural that you’re with somebody else. I have prepared myself when this happened and yet, how come whenever I see you two together, it breaks me?_

The day of the meeting at the Byun’s, Kyungsoo woke up extra early to prepare.

 

He fixes the bed, changed the sheets and covers of the pillows for the next person to use this – though he thinks Yoora will be the next once since she hinted on going to see an Avril Lavigne concert this April and the only country that she’s dated for a concert on that month is South Korea. Tomorrow will be his last stay here in Korea because if this meeting about the final proposal is over, it will only conclude in two things: the Byun’s won’t consider the design he gave and declines so he will go back to London afterwards or they will approve and by the next day he will leave to go to Malaysia for the construction.

 

His days with Baekhyun is slowly counting down to zero. But it’s for the best, he thinks. They’re already living separate lives, after all. It’s better this way. Because no matter how much two people love one another, if they are not for each other then they won’t be together in the end. That’s just how fate works and as time goes by, Kyungsoo has grown to accept that.

 

He takes a deep breath and checks everything from top to bottom, even checking his bags that’s sitting idly on the living room chair before leaving the room with his satchel hanging off his shoulder.

 

When he opens the door, he sees Baekhyun in the middle of locking his apartment door. He has this absentminded look on his face, contradicting the one he made last night when he was with Joonmyeon. Kyungsoo mentally debates on what to do: whether he should greet Baekhyun a _good morning_ or ask if _everything is okay?_

 

Kyungsoo approaches him and gently reaches over. “Hey, uh…”  

 

“Kyungsoo!”

 

It was as if time stopped in that particular moment. Kyungsoo’s heart is beating furiously that it rings through his ears. He quickly looks at Baekhyun and sees, horrified as said man’s eyes widens a fraction upon hearing this.

 

Kyungsoo turns to look at the direction where the voice came from and there stood Park Chanyeol with that ear to ear grin on his face.

 

Shit.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dun dun dun


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There was a long moment of silence before Jongdae spoke. “I know this is random, but I just wanted to say I’m sorry.” And with that, he hung up. Baekhyun looks at his phone in confusion before tossing it in front of him on the mattress. Sorry? What could he have been sorry about? It’s not like Jongdae to be like that.

Baekhyun has never felt this so much pressure in his life.

 

He didn’t get much sleep last night after remembering the events of it and it's not helping that his head is feeling kind of woozy from staying up till 5 in the morning – yes, 2 hours of sleep is a bad idea. Don’t ever do it - and he could have been up until now if he hadn’t used a sleeping pill.

 

He woke up with Jongdae calling him around seven in the morning. Hearing Jongdae’s panicked voice is something new. He doesn’t hear that kind of tone from the younger male none too often.

 

_“Baekhyun, what happened with your date with Joonmyeon last night?”_

Baekhyun blinks twice. “It was fine, why?”

 

There was a long moment of silence before Jongdae spoke. _“I know this is random, but I just wanted to say I’m sorry.”_ And with that, he hung up. Baekhyun looks at his phone in confusion before tossing it in front of him on the mattress. Sorry? What could he have been sorry about? It’s not like Jongdae to be like that.

 

He pursed his lips and stands up, absentmindedly feeling up the side table near the lamp for his necklace only to find that instead of the one Kyungsoo gave him, he ended up taking the new one – the one that Joonmyeon gave last night.

 

Last night, Joonmyeon had been aggressive. In every word he spoke, there’s a hidden meaning behind them like Baekhyun hiding a secret and how long their relationship was already for them to bare each other everything. But most of all, he was so adamant on taking that necklace off Baekhyun’s neck that at one point he has to excuse himself to go to the bathroom to take a breather.

 

At the end of the night, Joonmyeon said. “I love you, Baekhyun, and I really think that I’m ready.”

 

Confused, Baekhyun tilts his head. “Ready for what?”

 

The night is chilly and it’s already freezing outside, he wanted to tell his fiancé that if he wanted, they could go inside to talk about it, but Joonmyeon interrupts him with a firm, “To get married.”

 

Baekhyun stills.

 

“I know… you’re still not ready.” His eyes shifted down at the silver necklace hanging around his neck. “But when the time that you’re finally ready for it comes, I want you to wear it – I want to see it on your neck.” He pulls out the rectangular box and slips it inside Baekhyun’s coat pocket. Baekhyun could only look at Joonmyeon in the eye in surprise.

 

Baekhyun sighs and runs his fingers through his hair. His head is throbbing now and he thinks he should just skip the day and take a rest but today is the meeting between the Chairman and Landon so he has to be there. And since he’s needed there, he need to get there early for he’s the one in charge of discussing the parts of the proposal that Landon wanted to change that he approved back in London.

 

He makes his way towards the bathroom but stops midway when he passes by the mirror. Slowly, he backtracks and faces it, looking at his tired and exhausted reflection. Oh, he hates how the human brain has a knack for choosing that moment to make him suffer by remembering past memories and the troubles of dealing with the things he’s facing right now.

 

“It’s just going to be for an hour, Byun.” He whispers after slapping his face so hard enough to wake him up from his daze-like state. “You can do it.”

 

After cleaning up and putting on fresh clothes, Baekhyun slips in his coat quietly while checking if he pulled out all of the plugs in the house. He wasn’t like this before because of his lifestyle then, but being with Kyungsoo taught him a lot of things and as time passed, he grew to adapt his lifestyle and made some of it his own – for example, pulling out all of the plugs before leaving the house. Electricity is still running even if you turn off the device and it will only add up to the bill.

 

Come to think of it, living alone like this reminds him of the promises he made with the boy to live together in this kind of place. It’s sad, come to think of it, for him to even hold on to the memories of the person who left him without even an explanation – to love that person who hurt him a lot despite being showered with love by someone else. It’s unfair, he thinks. It’s unfair to Joonmyeon.

 

Maybe it’s time… it’s been 11 years, after all. Maybe it was time to let go.

 

This is the first time Baekhyun is going out without wearing the necklace Kyungsoo gave him and oddly enough it made him feel naked. He slowly opened the door and stepped out, expecting to see Landon doing the same on the other end. But no, he didn’t appear and to be honest, Baekhyun is fine with it. Seeing Landon right now will only add to his stress.

 

Silently, he turns around and locks the door.

 

But as if by cue, the door behind him opens, and he hears soft clacks of shoes stepping out. Baekhyun continues on, absentmindedly locking the door, his actions dragging slower than the usual because of deep thoughts swirling in his head. He silently pleads for Landon to ignore him and walk on – silently pleading for the man to read the air around him and don’t bother him.

 

“Hey, uh…”

 

Baekhyun’s grip on his key card tightened upon hearing his voice. He remembers the guilt clenching his chest painfully the night when he was with Joonmyeon because while he’s with him all, he ever could think about was –

 

“Kyungsoo!”

 

It was as if everything stopped.

 

Baekhyun’s eyes widens a fraction upon hearing that.  

 

His heart is pounding furiously. It rings in his ears, the thrums, his palms getting sweaty and the way his sweat feels cold against his skin makes him shudder. Hearing that name again after so long gave him goosebumps crawling under his skin. Baekhyun has to grab his senses back again to stay sane.

 

“Yah, Kyungsoo.” The deep voice said, and he’s closer now. “I called you so many times. Why didn’t you answer?” He clicks his tongue in irritation. “Noona told me that you’d be staying here. It’s a good thing I’ve caught on you before you leave.”

 

 _Kyungsoo_. He hears it again.

 

Baekhyun slowly turns to look at Landon behind him and he sees him looking at him. His eyes tells a million reasons, a thousand of excuses and Baekhyun told himself before that he would take and understand all of it. But now, he’s not so sure anymore.

 

He watches as those eyes widens in horror. “Baekhyun!”

 

_He’s not sure what to feel anymore._

 

 

 

 

 

When Baekhyun came to, he finds himself inside his room, lying on the bed wearing loose clothes. He sees Jongdae sitting on the edge of the bed, scrolling up his phone, and the other hand resting on his leg. He was too focused on the device that he didn’t even notice Baekhyun is already awake not until he groans. Jongdae almost drops it.

 

“Oh, my god! Baekhyun, you fucking scared me!” Jongdae hurriedly gave Baekhyun the glass of water on the bed side table. “You passed out, you know? Oh, god. It was a good thing Minseok picked up the call or else.”

 

Baekhyun scoffs after drinking. “So you weren’t planning on answering if I call? What kind of a friend you are.”

 

Jongdae makes a face. “We were in the middle of morning sex, what was I supposed to do?” Baekhyun rolls his eyes. “Plus, I called you earlier and you seemed fine to me. What happened?”

 

Suddenly remembering everything, Baekhyun’s eyes went wide. “Where’s Landon?”

 

“Landon Park? He left with someone after I came. He said they were running late for a meeting.” Jongdae raised a brow. “Why?”

 

So it’s true. Landon Park and Do Kyungsoo are one and the same. He pinches the bridge of his nose and makes a move to leave. He needs to get to the meeting fast. He needs to talk to Kyungsoo.

 

But before he could even stand up, Jongdae puts a hand on his chest to stop him. “Woah there, champ. Where the fuck do you think you’re going?” He frowns. “If you’re thinking of going to the meeting, then you can forget about it. I called your mom earlier and she said that she understands and just told you to take a rest. Whatever that’s going to happen in the meeting, Landon and your father are going to be fine.”

 

“No, it’s not that. I just need to –“

 

“Baekhyun, seriously… stop.” Jongdae grabs his hands and gently pushed him back to the same position as he was before. “Now stay there and sleep. I, Kim Jongdae the great, will tend to your needs for today.”

 

“But –“

 

“Shh…” Jongdae gives him a look. “Stop.” Baekhyun deflates and sighs. “Look, I don’t know what the deal is, but if you’re **really** that desperate to talk to Landon, you can do that later, you know.” He waves away in dismissal. “It’s not like he’s going to disappear all of the sudden.”

 

Oh, Jongdae, you have no idea.

 

“And oh, I almost forgot.” Jongdae passed his phone to him. “You got a message.”

 

 

 

 

 

Kyungsoo is lost.

 

Chanyeol is beside him in the taxi and he looks too cheerful for his own good, oblivious at what he had done. Kyungsoo couldn’t blame him if he could, though, because his brother has no idea of who Baekhyun is to him. When he became a Park, he left everything behind, after all. He never opened up past scars to anyone.

 

But even then, he can’t stop the urge to punch Chanyeol square on the face. He doesn’t, though, because that would be unfair.

 

“What are you doing here?” He mutters. “I thought you were okay with me taking the Byun’s as a client?”

 

“Oh, I’m not here for that, stupid.” Chanyeol rolls his eyes. He beams. “I’m here because I have good news for you.”

 

Kyungsoo furrows his brows. “Good news? What is it?”

 

Chanyeol grins. “Dad will tell you. I came here because I’m going to pick you up. It’s a big announcement, you know.” He cups his mouth and whispers. “Even Yoora’s coming.”

 

Kyungsoo’s eyes went wide. If Yoora’s coming, that means this news is going to be big. Their big sister is the type of person that doesn’t get involve with family matters and just travels a lot like a bird after escaping its cage but if this news is enough to make her come home, this means it’s important.

 

He doesn’t know what will happen between Baekhyun and him now, but he knows what he’s going to do. After all, it’s what he does best.

 

 

 

 

 

Chairman Byun’s room is like the way as he remembers it before.

 

The cream-colored walls still look pleasant, giving off a friendly aura, and the plastic plants still looked real from a distance. The chairman is sitting on the head chair with four other men seated on the couches. Kyungsoo and Chanyeol bows their heads in greeting upon entering.

 

“You must be Landon Park.” Chairman Byun grunts. He has a pleasant smile plastered on his face contradicting the one he gave him eleven and a half years ago. “And Park Chanyeol? Two of Changho’s son in front of me. This is a treat.”

 

Kyungsoo prepares the smile he practiced for long nights. “It’s good to be in your presence as well, Mr. Chairman.”

 

The old man leans a bit to give a kind gesture. “Would you like anything to drink? Brandy? A wine might be of your taste.”

 

“Ah, it’s fine.” Kyungsoo slides in the seat in front of them, with Chanyeol following and taking his place on the seat beside him.

 

If there’s something that changed within the past years, it’s age. The man looked weaker than before, gray hairs standing out and wrinkles evident on his face. The scary frown remains, however, and his intimidating aura. Before, these were the small things about Baekhyun’s father that frightens Kyungsoo but now, it makes him furious.

 

Eleven and a half years back, he had nothing and this man was insulting him because of it. Now, he’s being friendly because of his status and his obvious success. It’s disgusting really. Is he still going to treat him like this, he wonders, if he found out about his real identity?

 

“Let’s move on and talk about the proposal about the construction of the new building.” He mouths a thanks from Chanyeol after he handed him the brown envelope. “Baekhyun-sshi isn’t here at the moment but it’s fine. I’ll be the one to personally explain about the changes that we have discussed back at our first meeting.”

 

Chairman Byun sighs heavily and waves. “I see. Very well,” He shifts his position and gestures with his two fingers. “You may begin.”

 

 

 

 

 

After the meeting, Chairman Byun looks pleased about the report and immediately signed the contract. One by one, he shook hands with the people inside the room, only to stop when it was already the Chairman’s turn. Just thinking – just knowing that he’s going to shake hands with the one person he despised the most, irritates him to the core, but Kyungsoo has to swallow his pride and accepts the hand, choosing to continue the charade.

 

Before leaving, he grabs Chanyeol by the shoulder. “Chanyeol, Landon, I would very much like you two to come and join my family for dinner tonight.” He said with his gruff voice.

 

Chanyeol looks okay with it and he was about to say his answer but Kyungsoo beats him to it with a polite smile. “Ah, I’m really sorry, Chairman Byun. But we have prior businesses to take care of. If your offer is still open, we would very much like to join once we’re free.”

 

“Is that so?” Chairman Byun chuckles deeply. “Okay, it’s fine. Seeing you youngsters work in the business reminded me of my younger years. It’s refreshing.”

 

Everything was fake. It was all fake and fucking hell, it’s so exhausting to act like this. The anger hidden behind the depths of his insides is burning and he’s giving it all of his might to stop himself from exploding and pushing the man away from him because he’s too close for comfort.

 

Chanyeol gives his shoulder a gentle shake after they finally left the room. “You okay?”

 

“I’m fine.” Kyungsoo sighs. “I’m fine.”

 

While on their way to get a taxi, his phone blares a familiar ringtone. Chanyeol doesn’t seem to notice because he’s busy trying to call a taxi while complaining how hard it is to get one here in the Korea compared to London. Kyungsoo sighs and accepts the call. “Hello?”

 

_“Sup, buddy. Caught you in a bad time?”_

“Ah shit, Joonmyeon.” Kyungsoo squeezes his eyes shut and chuckles. “No, no… just a headache coming on. Just finished taking care of something related to work. Why?”

 

_“Does that mean you’re free now, right?”_

Kyungsoo furrows his brows (He can hear Chanyeol’s frustrated yells on the background.) He is. He’s very free and he knows their next destination is back at the apartment to rest, meaning, Baekhyun’s going to be there probably waiting for him to come back and explain. He doesn’t want that. Not when he’s still not ready. Kyungsoo shifts his phone on his left ear.

 

“I’m free.”

 

 _“Great! Because I want you to come and eat lunch with me.”_ Joonmyeon giddily said. _“Plus, I have a surprise for you so don’t come bailing on me, Landon!”_

“Okay, fine… fine. I get it. I’ll go.” Kyungsoo drags a hand down his face, laughing. “I’m just going to tell Chanyeol I’ll –“

 

_“Wait, Chanyeol’s here? How come that brat didn’t tell me, ah! Get him to come here, too!”_

“Yeah, I’ll tell him.” Kyungsoo’s gaze shifted at his brother when he sees the man fist-pumping in the air after he successfully hailed a cab. He can hear him calling his name frantically earning a few stares. Kyungsoo feels like a turtle wanting to hide under his shell in embarrassment. “Listen, I got to go. Chanyeol’s being a shit again.” He whispers.

 

_“I’ll be waiting!”_

 

“Yah, Kyungsoo. Come on!” Chanyeol waves at him with that huge derpy grin plastered on his face. Kyungsoo could only shake his head and sigh while he approaches his brother.

 

“Joonmyeon wanted us to come – Oh, shit…” Kyungsoo groans. He doesn’t know where to go in the first place. That blasted guy didn’t even send an address of – his phone vibrated in his coat pocket and Kyungsoo opens it upon seeing it coming from Joonmyeon – voila! It was the address. He sighs. “Nevermind…”

 

Chanyeol hums in confusion. “Wait, Joonmyeon? What does he want again?”

 

“He wants us to have lunch with him.” Kyungsoo smiles and asks for the driver to take them to place that’s written on the message Joonmyeon sent him once he got in and takes his seat, with Chanyeol following and closing the door with a thud. The taxi moved after he did so.

 

“I’m in the mood for McDonald’s, though.” Chanyeol mutters. “Knowing that guy, he’s going to meet up at somewhere fancy.”

 

Kyungsoo grins. “Well, aren’t you excited to meet him again?”

 

“A little bit.” Then he nudges his ribs. “Don’t tell him I said that. He won’t let it go if he found out about it.” He groans. “I need to pee, though so…” He looks at the driver. “Uh, sir? Can you please hurry up?”

 

The driver rolls his eyes.

 

Kyungsoo laughs before turning his attention to the scenery outside the window. It’s stupid, he knows, and a little immature for him to run away in confrontations. He pictured this happening multiple times in his head but somehow Baekhyun always catches him in surprise. He needs time to think about his next move because once in his life he wanted to do more than just run.

 

He’s tired of running.

 

 

 

 

 

Somewhere in the back of his mind, he remembers Ryeowook telling him the words he said, “ _Then what are you doing right now?”_

Then again, Kyungsoo doesn’t know.

 

 

 

 

 

It’s around 11:30 when they arrived at the place. As Chanyeol had expected, it was fancy and formal – he sees men in business attires sitting around the table talking in lighthearted tones but with a busy atmosphere, others dine casually with their kids in fancy dresses and pastel colored skirts – and the music is too classic for his tastes. It was a good thing they were dressed suitable for the place.

 

Before they could even venture inside a bit more, Joonmyeon was already there welcoming them with that big smile and wide arms open. “You guys are here!” He grabs Kyungsoo by the hand and pulls him in an embrace. “Took you long enough, you dolts!” He gave one to Chanyeol, too, but the man evaded after a quick greeting because he’s zeroing to the waitress asking for the bathroom. Kyungsoo sighs.

 

“Anyways,” Joonmyeon said before he could talk. “About that surprise,” He winces. “It’s coming a bit late so –“

 

As if by cue, the restaurant doors open behind them, a faint greeting from the guards outside and a chime of the bell were enough to make Joonmyeon’s attention shift to the door. His eyes widens in delight and his smile so wide it almost reaches his ears.

 

“Baekhyun, you made it!”

 

Kyungsoo froze.

 

It was as if everything is in slow motion, Kyungsoo turns around to face him, watching as Baekhyun’s eyes widen a fraction upon seeing him here. His heart is drumming nervously and he finds it hard to breath at the sudden heaviness of the atmosphere. It’s like someone is choking him to death and there’s no escape.

 

“I’ve always wanted to do this for so long, my best friend and the fiancé: two of the most important people to me to meet finally.” He chuckles.

 

Kyungsoo wants to run, Baekhyun doesn’t look like he wants to be here and Joonmyeon is oblivious to everything.

 

He should have gone with Chanyeol to the bathroom.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> unbeta'd (forevs)


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He feels his hip being squeezed tenderly and their bodies flushed close. Joonmyeon always does this whenever they’re talking to another person and Baekhyun finds comfort in this but this is the first time did it ever feel uncomfortable. Kyungsoo looks frozen, but he managed to recover quickly. The man’s lips quirk into a half-smile, looking pleasant but distant. Baekhyun clenches his fist.

Baekhyun wanted to decline’s Joonmyeon’s invitation because he wanted to wait for Kyungsoo to come back to the apartment so that they could talk. However, the guilt residing in him started acting up so he said that he’ll come. Joonmyeon looked like he’s excited about something, too. He kept on calling him every hour or so if he’s already finished getting ready; Baekhyun can’t help but laugh at this.

 

It’s probably another surprise, he thought. Joonmyeon probably planned another event for him that will persuade him into agreeing into tying the knot already. However, he did not expect this…

 

…to see Kyungsoo standing in front of him mirroring the same expression as he’s doing right now.

 

“I’ve always wanted to do this for so long! My best friend and fiancé: two of the most important people to me to meet finally.” Joonmyeon chuckle.

 

He feels his hip being squeezed tenderly and their bodies flushed close. Joonmyeon always does this whenever they’re talking to another person and Baekhyun finds comfort in this but this is the first time did it ever feel uncomfortable. Kyungsoo looks frozen, but he managed to recover quickly. The man’s lips quirk into a half-smile, looking pleasant but distant. Baekhyun clenches his fist.

 

“Actually, we already met, Joonmyeon.” Kyungsoo said. “We had a meeting back at London about the incoming construction of a sister branch in their company.” He raises his brows. “Baekhyun-sshi, isn’t it?” 

 

That charming and care-free façade. That exact same smile.

 

Just like the time they first met at London.

 

“Wait, really?” Joonmyeon furrows his brows. He looks between him and Kyungsoo with a look of disbelief. “What? So this doesn’t surprise you?”

 

“Was I supposed to be?” Kyungsoo playfully rolled his eyes, laughing when Joonmyeon punched him lightly on the arm. “If there’s anyone who’s surprised, it’s probably Baekhyun-sshi.” The change in his eyes is obvious in Baekhyun’s perspective, playfulness gone despite the half-smile still plastered on his face. Kyungsoo slips his hand inside his pocket.

 

“Small world, isn’t it?”

 

“Yeah.” Baekhyun said, looking straight in his eyes. “It is.”

 

Oblivious at the tension, Joonmyeon claps his hands. “Since the surprise is an utter failure,” He gives Kyungsoo’s shoulder a clap, extra hard enough to make him groan. “Shall we head to our table? God, I’m famished.”

 

“I thought you’d never ask.” Kyungsoo smiles.

 

He can’t help but feel bitter at the way Kyungsoo is acting. He can’t believe he’s pretending like his presence doesn’t even matter! What’s with the casual approach? While he’s here feeling like jelly and weak on the knees, Kyungsoo’s acting like nothing – like meeting each other again after 11 fucking years isn’t a big deal!

 

“Hey, Baek.” Joonmyeon whispers against his ear, startling him. “You, okay?”

 

Baekhyun feels fine, really. But Kyungsoo is looking at him now after he heard Joonmyeon and suddenly, he feels un-fine, if that’s even a word. He feels opposite of fine – he’s far from fine. He wants to leave!

 

“Y-Yeah.” Baekhyun turns to him and gives him a shaky smile. “Let’s go?”

 

 

 

 

 

After the order had been made, Joonmyeon engages Kyungsoo in small talk, finally detecting the awkward atmosphere around them. He probably thought it was normal since they’re not that generally close. Kyungsoo acts like his nonchalant self while he, on the other hand, is hovering dangerously close on the wine. Not good.

 

“By the way, how did the meeting between you and the chairman go?”

 

Kyungsoo smiles. “It went good. I’ll be going to Malaysia as planned and I’ll probably stay there for the meantime until the construction is done.” He eyes the glass of cherry red wine sitting on his left side and did not hesitate to take a sip while he hears him talk. Crazy yet it was the only option he has at this moment. “It’s going to be a dreadful back and forth between countries.” He groans. “Not to mention tiring, too.”

 

“I’ve been there.” Joonmyeon grimaces. “It was horrible. The amount of jet lag was too much for me take.”

 

“Jetlag doesn’t affect me that much since I’m used to it. But sitting on a plane for hours takes my energy. It’s like there’s some kind of witchcraft that’s been done there to suck every passenger’s life force in their body.”

 

“Oh, damn! I remember back in college Taecyeon used to bring us to these Harry Potter conventions and then he would force us to dress like a wizard.” Kyungsoo chuckles upon hearing this.

 

Baekhyun’s ear perked. “College?”

 

The two gentlemen stopped talking, their attention now on him and it made Baekhyun red in embarrassment. He feels small under Kyungsoo’s gaze and it wasn’t helping that Joonmyeon slips a hand on his thigh to give it a small squeeze. The things they were doing to him were enough to make him lose his mind – like the air around him is thinning and he’s trapped in a box that he can’t escape.

 

But then Kyungsoo breaks into an amused smile and suddenly, Baekhyun couldn’t breathe.

 

“Oh, right. Silly me, I forgot.” Joonmyeon chuckles. “Landon and I were college roommates. That’s how we first met, but we weren’t close back freshmen year. He said he wasn’t used to being around with people but I think you were still in your emo phase then.”  

 

“I was not emo, mind you.”

 

The playful banter between Kyungsoo and Joonmyeon is natural. The bond is there – the friendship is completely obvious for anyone to see. Baekhyun places his arm on the table and leans his chin on his knuckles as he listens and watches over them, eyes trained on the way Kyungsoo’s eyes crinkle in delight when he laughs.

 

Joonmyeon releases a sigh after the laughter fades. “We didn’t talk much, but we only got close when he started dating my cousin. You know Jongin, right babe?”

 

The smile on Baekhyun’s face froze.

 

Kyungsoo looks uncomfortable, avoiding Baekhyun gaze. “H-Hey, Joonmyeon –“

 

Dating? Kyungsoo dated Jongin?

 

Baekhyun remembered meeting Joonmyeon’s cousin – the sun-kissed skin boy with a juicy body that reminded you of a chicken sweating oil while being cooked and it’s the most delicious thing you’ve ever tasted – yes, the metaphor is downright twisted but if you ever saw him personally, you will think the same thing. Baekhyun remembered biting his lips repeatedly when he saw the man at Joonmyeon’s reunion party. Jongin looked like an angel then, like he can do no wrong.

 

Upon knowing this, however, he thinks that he’s never gonna see Jongin the same way again. Dammit.

 

“It was like first love all over again. Like, they can’t keep their hands off of each other!” The older man continued, feigning ignorance at Kyungsoo’s silent plead to stop. “It was a shame that they broke up. I mean, three years is –“

 

“Hey, aren’t you the guy who passed out this morning?”

 

Somehow it’s as if the deities just love to flat out squish him on the ground because what the fucking hell is that tall man doing here in this restaurant? He has a creepy smile, twitchy eyes and a suit that fits him too much enough to see biceps. Others might drool on the sight but not Baekhyun. He has a strong dislike of ripped guys.

 

“Passed out?” Joonmyeon furrows his brows and looks at him. “You passed out this morning?”

 

Baekhyun gulps hard. “Uh –“

 

“You looked exhausted then, man. I reckoned you got a good sleep?” Tall man smiles and reaches a hand out to him. “I’m Park Chanyeol, by the way.” He winks. “I’m also known as the hottest brother. What’s your name by the way, gorgeous?”

 

“Don’t call him that.”

 

Joonmyeon and Kyungsoo looked at each other with wide eyes.

 

Baekhyun wants to sink down at the awkwardness of it all.

 

Kyungsoo clears his throat. “Stop flirting with a taken man, you idiot.”

 

“I’m the only one who can call him that, mind you.” Joonmyeon chuckles, lifting his arm to place it Baekhyun’s shoulder and looks at him endearingly. Baekhyun looks like he wants to cry and laugh at the same time. Maybe this is the _constipated_ face that Jongdae keeps on teasing him about. But then the conversation reeled back and Joonmyeon reverts to his concerned face. “You passed out? What?”

 

“It’s uh… Byun Baekhyun.” He answers while he accepts the tall man’s hand – he’s slightly sorry for making that hand wait for a while – and shakes it twice. “It’s nice to meet you, Chanyeol-sshi.”

 

“Oh, surely you jest. It is I, who is feeling very nice to meet you.” Baekhyun blinks rapidly. Now, that he finally realizes who this man is (curtesy of Jongdae’s magazine) it is not a surprise why this man is quite popular in both sexes. Chanyeol, despite the first creepy impression, is charming and has this strong appeal that can draw your attention to him only.

 

His jokes are like an uncle, but his laugh is contagious making it funny. Baekhyun can’t help but crack a smile and this time, it wasn’t forced and awkward.

 

“Baekhyun, you passed out and you didn’t tell me!” Joonmyeon bursts.

 

“It was a good thing Landon and I were there when you collapsed.” Chanyeol said while he took a seat beside Kyungsoo. “It would have been scary if you were in the middle of driving or commuting. Fortunately, it happened to be in front of your apartment.” The taller places his hand on Kyungsoo’s shoulder and shakes it. “Landon was all macho and lifted you like you were nothing inside our flat, you know?”

 

Baekhyun can feel his throat dry up.

 

Kyungsoo looks like he wants to leave (for the nth time.)

 

“Wait… wait… our flat?” Joonmyeon furrows his brows in confusion. “Wait, so you two…” He points between Baekhyun and Kyungsoo. “…live in the same building?”

 

“It was our sister’s flat.” Kyungsoo cuts in before Chanyeol could. “Yoora’s place. And I didn’t know, actually, that he lived there considering the place looked empty.”

 

 _But you had coffee there – we had coffee together in there._ Baekhyun wanted to voice those words out. _We even watched a fucking movie together!_

“But now that I think about it, it’s not a surprise.” Kyungsoo grins.

 

Joonmyeon beams. “Ah, Baekhyunnie is always out of the country so he seldom comes home, but when he does, he goes straight to my place.” He gave his shoulder a squeeze.

 

Revelations came down on them like boulders trying to squish them but while Baekhyun struggles, Kyungsoo dodges them with ease. It’s like lying to him is second nature and he doesn’t have any problems on doing it. Baekhyun, on the other hand, looks like he’s trying to take a dump whenever he lies.

 

Despite being grateful that he chose to lie in front of Joonmyeon to avoid conflict, Baekhyun still feels hurt because Kyungsoo is denying his involvement with him. Hearing those words he can’t help but think, did those smiles and words even genuine? Did they even mean anything?

 

 

 

 

 

When it was time to leave, an emergency call came from Joonmyeon asking if he could come to the office for short-notice due to a mix up. Joonmyeon makes an irritated noise before saying that he understands and that he’ll come there as soon as possible.

 

“I want to come, too!” Chanyeol beams. “It’s been so long since I last saw everyone there.” Joonmyeon smiles and nods. Chanyeol once worked with them in remodeling the company. It’s only natural for him to want to see the people he made friends with.

 

That leaves Baekhyun with Kyungsoo.

  
“I know!” Joonmyeon grins. “Since you two are going to the same place, anyway, why don’t you go together?

 

Terrible idea, Kyungsoo thought.

 

“Call me when you reached your place, alright?” Baekhyun nods. Joonmyeon smiles at this and cups his face, thumbing his cheek before kissing him chastely. Kyungsoo has to turn away and focused his attention upwards.

 

Terrible, terrible idea.

 

After Joonmyeon drove away with Chanyeol, Baekhyun turns on his heel and walks past him, their shoulders brushing as he does. However, one step after, he said, “Let’s talk” in a volume he could only hear. With no other choice, Kyungsoo follows him.

 

It was a silent walk between the two them with Baekhyun leading and Kyungsoo following behind. Less people come to pass by them as they continue and soon there was only a few that Kyungsoo can count with only one hand.

 

In every step, Kyungsoo notices Baekhyun’s pace slowing down and his form becoming sluggish until they reached the empty bus stop. Baekhyun’s hand wrapped around the green metal pole and he has his head hang low. His shoulder is shaking and at first, Kyungsoo grew worried when he sees this and takes a step to approach him.

 

“Baekhyun –“

 

“Just…” Baekhyun sniffed and wipes his eyes before turning to face him. “…stop… I don’t want to hear you… just…”

 

Once the first tear broke free, the rest followed. Baekhyun bites his lower lip and slowly walks towards him as the tears roll down like an unbroken stream.

 

The sight breaks his heart like there was a hand that punched through his chest and squeezed his heart, watching Baekhyun like this… clutching on a fat chunk of his coat like his life depended on it. Like a dull thud, he feels Baekhyun’s head pressed against his chest, and then he began to cry as hard as he could.

 

Painful is an understatement on what he is feeling in this moment. He feels so helpless and useless at the same time that all he could do is stand there and let his tears to soak through his coat. He can feel him clench his fist and he could hear him silently screaming and gasping as if he is suffocating with each breath he takes. The urge to run his fingers through his hair or better yet, wrap him in a tight embrace is strong but Kyungsoo didn’t.

 

It was a soft whisper and he doesn’t know if he is meant to hear it, but he did and hearing those words directed to him made his heart stutter.

 

 _“I missed you.”_ He said.

 

It was the breaking point. Kyungsoo was already at his limit. After swallowing the lump in his throat, he releases a shaky sigh and whispers. “Baekhyun, I –“

 

He should have expected the punch that came after that.

 

 

 

 

 

It’s nearing dark and yet, they’re still here: Baekhyun with his red and puffy eyes while Kyungsoo with a bleeding lip. They sit here on the bench, watching in a daze at the quiet road in front of them. People who passed by them or waited for the bus tried not to acknowledge them despite the hidden curiosity as to why and what happened. Humans and their tendency to love gossip. Ugh.

 

The moment he sees Baekhyun shudder lightly, Kyungsoo stands up and reaches out to place his hand on Baekhyun’s shoulder but stops midway. He clenches his hand into a fist instead and retreats. “Baekhyun… let’s go.”

 

Baekhyun slowly looks at him and nods.

 

 

 

 

 

Chanyeol drunkenly giggles as he waves goodbye over the staffs’ loud protest and whines that he comes back and hang out with them more in the near future. On the other hand, Joonmyeon can’t seem to sit still throughout the whole time.

 

Outside the pub, Joonmyeon pulls out his phone and checks his phone for the nth time for Baekhyun’s text message or if he ever did missed a call from him. There was none, however, and it made Joonmyeon’s heart sink.

 

“Checking on your fiancé?”

 

Joonmyeon tilts his head, looking up because of the taller’s height. “Yeah, uh…” He looks down on his phone and repeatedly presses the power button making the device’s screen light up and close again and again and again. “He seems busy. I tried calling him but I couldn’t reach him.”

 

“Ah,” Chanyeol slowly nods and hums. “Let him be. He’s probably tired. Maybe after he arrived, he decided to catch up with some sleep.” He gives him a clap on the back when Joonmyeon didn’t budge. “Yah, he’s with Landon. He got home safe, I’m sure of it.”

 

It’s not that… No doubt Baekhyun already got back hours ago and he trusts Landon enough that even if he wouldn’t check, he knows Baekhyun got back safe. What’s bothering him is that aching feeling he felt when they both went their separate ways earlier that afternoon.

 

Baekhyun felt so distant then that it scares him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Baekhyun listens as Kyungsoo narrates his life after he left Seoul. Kyungsoo tells about how it was hard to adjust in a foreign and new place where everyone is so big and intimidating. He felt small then but because of that, he learned to be independent and to trust his instincts.

 

He confirmed the things that Joonmyeon said earlier, even dating the man’s cousin, Jongin, and tells the time he met Mr. Park, his step-father.

 

“I didn’t know what really caused my parents’ death.” Kyungsoo said. “The people working with mom told me that she left to go fetch dad at the docks so that they could go home but she never came back. The others said that they were lost in sea. Others say that it was a car accident.”

 

As Kyungsoo tells his story, something suddenly clicked.

 

Baekhyun, back then, felt helpless and stupid. After graduation, his parents treated him on a vacation with Jongdae and a few of their high school friends at Macau. And when he came back, the house where Kyungsoo lives is empty.

 

He realized that while he was getting frustrated back at China because of Kyungsoo not answering his calls, Kyungsoo was here mourning over the loss of his parents. While he was out having fun with his friends, Kyungsoo was terrified of facing the world alone.

 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Baekhyun asks after the elevator beeps and opens. He follows Kyungsoo when he steps out. “I would have –“

 

“You would have done nothing.” Kyungsoo cuts in abruptly and Baekhyun would lie if he said that didn’t hurt a bit. “And even if you did, it would be useless.”

 

The hall was empty when they walked. He can hear Kyungsoo’s faint clacking of shoes in every step and it somehow matches the way his heart skips in every clack. Baekhyun can see the doors of their flat already and he knew if he didn’t speak, those remaining minutes will turn into seconds until Kyungsoo would disappear once again in sight. So despite feeling nervous and terrified that he might say the wrong words, he decided to just fuck it and break the heavy silence himself.

 

“I was so busy with my studies and furthering my career that I didn’t have time to think about you.”

 

Baekhyun stills.

 

“So you don’t have to worry.” Kyungsoo said. “What happened between us in the past will be kept as a secret to Joonmyeon. The last thing I want to do is to wreck a relationship, especially if it’s between my best friend and his fiancé.”

 

“Kyungsoo –“

 

“Landon.” Kyungsoo looks at him as if he’s pleading for Baekhyun to stop and not to argue with him anymore. “It’s Park Landon now.”

 

When they reached the doors, Kyungsoo did not waste time and unlocks his door. Baekhyun could only watch helplessly as he enters and leaves, without even saying much a good night or a good bye. Baekhyun tries to hold back the tears once again – his jaw hurts from gritting too much and it’s hard to slide the card in now with his sight getting blurry because of the tears.

 

Crying takes too much energy. Feeling angry and sad takes even more energy. And he thought he doesn’t have any more left to cry, but here he was again.

 

Baekhyun presses his palm against his eye and slides down on the floor as he finally accepts the pain. Once the first tear got away, the rest followed uncontrollably that he has to wipe them over and over with his palms like a child. His lungs craved for oxygen and he finds himself gasping for air like a man drowning. The flesh under his ribcage throbbed, his cheeks burning, and his mind replaying old memories and scenarios that made the tears continue.

 

It’s unfair, he thinks, it’s so unfair.

 

Baekhyun continues to cry that night, not knowing that on the other side of the door, Kyungsoo is doing the same thing.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> because #emosoo and #emobaek is heart  
> can't stop replaying melodies in life (ffix ost) in my phone. like wtf i crei


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> That morning, Baekhyun finally gained the courage to confront Kyungsoo once again. Last night had been a disaster – a total opposite of his expectations, embarrassing really, because he had thought their conversation would ended with hugs, but no, far from it, actually. Also, last night he didn’t get to say what he wanted because his mind was a muddled mess then.

Jongdae enters his boyfriend’s café oozing with happiness. After that night, his boyfriend, Minseok, and he reached the next level of their relationship. Though at first he felt terrified sitting in the elder’s car, waiting for his inevitable doom to come only to turn a 180 degrees turn when Minseok’s parents welcome him in their abode like family.

 

When their eyes met, Minseok flushed crimson making Jongdae’s heart throb. He clears his throat and approaches the counter, seeing that there’s no one lining up anyways.

 

“Hi.”

 

Minseok flashes that gummy grin he loves. “Hey.”

 

As much as Jongdae wants to lean over to kiss him, he can’t because it’s business hours and he doesn’t want to disrupt his boyfriend’s work, not that he’s not doing it now anyways. He checks up behind him to see if there’s anyone and when he sees none, he bends over, resting his arms against the counter and cheekily smiles. “Did you sleep well?”

 

The barista snorts. “After last night, who wouldn’t? Baekhyunnie, however…” He points at the man with his lips. Jongdae turns to follow where he’s pointing and beams in excitement, making a move to bounce over to the man. But before he could even make a step, Minseok pulls him back by the collar that has his hips reeling on the counter. “Hey, hey, hey, are you that oblivious or are you really that dumb?”

 

Jongin blinks rapidly. “Why, what’s wrong?”

 

With his legs crossed, Baekhyun stares at the people walking past the shop by the window with a glum and dazed expression. His chin is resting on his palm, elbow on top of the table near a cup of coffee that is untouched. Befuddled, Jongdae leans back and tilts his head, furrowing his brows.

 

“What’s up with him?”

 

“Ah, he’s been like that since he came here.” Minseok murmurs. “Baekhyunnie, looks like he’s going through something. Didn’t even greet me with that usual good morning smile he has on.” The he whispers. “He didn’t even touched his Berry Mocha.”

 

“But everyone loves your Berry Mocha!”

 

“I know, but that’s not the point.” Minseok waves away. “Do you think he’s acting like that because he got in a fight with Joonmyeon?” Jongdae gasps, horrified at the thought.

 

Joonmyeon and Baekhyun never fight, it’s a rare but a good thing that Jongdae is greatly envious at since Minseok and he did get in a fight less than often (because he’s stubborn, yes, Jongdae admits that.) And seeing them right now like this, it makes Jongdae’s lips quiver knowing that it’s his careless mouth that might have caused this.

 

He feels a soft pat on his shoulder. “You better treat him food today.”

 

“I know, I know.”

 

 

 

 

 

That morning, Baekhyun finally gained the courage to confront Kyungsoo once again. Last night had been a disaster – a total opposite of his expectations, embarrassing really, because he had thought their conversation would ended with hugs, but no, far from it, actually. Also, last night he didn’t get to say what he wanted because his mind was a muddled mess then.

 

(His mind is **still** a muddled mess, though.)

 

Plus, he prepared a whole speech today. Baekhyun stares at the door in such determination that can surpass that of anyone. However, that determination is crushed when he was greeted by the landlord doing his weekly rounds of maintenance.

 

“Oh, the Parks left earlier this morning, said that they’ll be going back home.” He scratches his chin thoughtfully. “Looks like the place is gonna be empty again for the whole year.”

 

Hurt is an understatement on what he felt that moment.

 

“You ran away again.” Baekhyun mutters in a daze at the fogged up glass window of the café.

 

Eleven years of searching and waiting, of hoping and wanting and yet, it ended up with a distressing confrontation and Kyungsoo fleeing. Baekhyun groans and drags his hand down his face. With Kyungsoo not wanting to have anything to do with him and his unending search for closure, Baekhyun finds himself unknowing of what to do.

 

His phone lays idle on the wooden table near his coffee. Half-mindedly, he reaches out and opens it, revealing the picture he took back at senior year at the mountain on their retreat camp.

 

He remembers the memory as if it was just yesterday. Baekhyun let the mischievous side of him take over and sneaks out with Kyungsoo, who keeps on complaining about waking up early and the mosquitos, and decided to go over the cliff to see the sunrise. And despite the mini-tantrums Kyungsoo made and the mini-argument they had along the way, the view washed the on-going bickering they were into.

 

Taking a deep breath, Baekhyun cups his mouth and shouts, _“Do Kyungsoo, will you marry me?!”_ on the top of his lungs. 

 

Kyungsoo had laughed then even if his face is all pink, completely flustered and surprised at the sudden question. He didn’t give an answer then but by the way he glued himself to Baekhyun on the way down, it was answer enough.

 

Remembering it now makes his chest clench painfully seeing how their lives turned out to be more complicated than it ever was. Somehow, he envied the younger version of him, whose main problem was going in the same university as Kyungsoo and the expenses they will be having when they’re living together. He doesn’t know where everything went wrong. Was it him? Did Kyungsoo grew tired of being with him? Or did he do something that hurt him? The questions are limitless.

 

Baekhyun unlocks his phone and absent-mindedly unlocks his phone and decides to finally check the messages that’s been piling up ever since he woke up. There were four from his Mom. One from Luhan and three from Joonmyeon.

 

Then there’s Landon.

 

There were no messages, but just seeing his name made his heart stutter. Ignoring the other messages, he presses the conversation between him and Landon which last dated back when he was still at London – their last talk about going out and giving him a tour around.

 

There’s that call button near his name on top and somehow it looks like it’s mocking him, no… it looks like it’s tempting him, taunting him to come… do it. Press it. _I know you’re dying to talk to him_.

 

And maybe he does that Baekhyun finds himself getting weak to temptation. It took a long time before his thumb hovers over the button, ready to get over it and press the button only to stop when Joonmyeon’s face appeared on the screen, phone vibrating and the familiar ringtone playing.

 

Baekhyun shakes his head and immediately accepts the call.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Kyungsoo is beyond exhausted when they reached the quite village of Arkley. Despite the fast-paced life he normally have daily, he finds the silence and smell of petrichor mixed with the afternoon smell of cigarettes old men hits while they wait for a bus near the bakery relaxing. Kyungsoo can’t help the faint smile to plaster on his face as he slowly roll up the car window.

 

After Chanyeol drove the rental car across the bridge, there he sees it, that huge black gate from a distance. And sitting in his small shed, with a hand-held game in his hands, is Henry.

 

When he sees them, he immediately clambers out of the shed and opens the gate, flashing a smile when the car slows down in front of him. Chanyeol rolls the window down and smirks. “Haha, got you.”

 

The 27 year old guard, Henry Lau, curls his lower lip in a pout, pulling off a very convincing aegyo in an attempt to save himself from a good scolding. “Ah, Chanyeol-sshi… Boss Chanyeol,” He starts. “I was just… I got bored waiting for you two, see? I didn’t know –“  

 

“Slacking off in your job is a big no, Henry.” Chanyeol tuts. “Tonight’s booze will be on you, I suppose?”

 

“Ah,” Henry sighs, pulling his hat off and scratching his nape. “Do I have a choice?”

 

“Great, I’ll send you message.”

  
Kyungsoo grins and waves his fingers when Chanyeol steps on the gas and continues inside. Along the way, he sees gardeners in different races, baring their upper body, sculpted and four-packs for everyone to see and their sweat glistening on the sun. Some he recognize while some he doesn’t. Kyungsoo sighs.

 

“Mom hired new ones?”

 

“Probably,” Chanyeol shrugs. “You know her.”

 

Their father had an affair once and it was the most scandalous thing that ever happened in the household. Though he said his sorry’s and everything were forgiven (Yoora had been the hardest) their mother proposed something to her husband in exchange for her forgiveness.

 

See those men outside looking younger than thirty? Yep, there’s your answer.

 

Three men came rushing forward when they got out of the car, immediately taking their bags and luggage out. Kyungsoo could only watch as men bow to them in greeting before rushing inside with their bags. He blinks rapidly and looks at Chanyeol, expecting a reaction from him only to see how he doesn’t seem fazed by it.

 

“Oh, god. You have no idea how much I’m glad to see you two here finally.” A deep gruff voice said, calling their attention. The man has streaks of grey on his hair and big round glasses hanging on his nose. Chanyeol beams.

 

“Dad!” Like a kid, he rushes to him and engulfs the man in a tight hug. It looks comical, to be honest, because Chanyeol is huge compared to the old man, and with Chanyeol draped on him, they look like a burrito.

 

“Ah, you look lively today for someone with jetlag.” Mr. Park grins and claps his son’s back twice before shifting his attention to him. “Kyungsoo.” Kyungsoo looks up and returns the grin. “Come here and give your old man a hug, too.”

 

And Kyungsoo did, wrapping the man in a tight embrace. He feels warm and he smells of old cigars mixed with brownies. A peculiar mixture yet Kyungsoo savors that smell anyways. He smells like home.

 

“Anyways, is it me or there are many new ones coming in.” Kyungsoo asks after they pulled away. “Did Mom hire new ones again?”

 

“Well, I told her twenty-five is enough, but apparently she wants it even than odd.” Mr. Park waves away with a roll of his eyes. “I swear, if one of them ended up sleeping with your Mom, I’ll –“

 

“You know Mom would never do that.” Chanyeol guffaws.

 

“Oh, you say that she won’t but with the way they’re acting, it’s as if they’re seducing her.” Mr. Park grumbles as he walks inside, ushering them towards the main hall. “The weather’s cold and they’re wearing nothing on top? How preposterous!”

 

It’s silly yes, hearing their father’s jealous rants about the personnel in the house since he’s the reason why their mom demanded this. But Kyungsoo couldn’t blame him for reacting like this – filled with attractive young men in the house and not to mention his own ghosts of the past haunting him, it’s only expected for Mr. Park to be a paranoid mess.

 

“Oh, my baby boys are back!” Mrs. Park squeals and saunters towards them, her heels clacking against marble floor as she does. She smells of her usual fragrant perfume that’s tickling their nose when she wraps them in a hug. Chanyeol looks like an excited puppy. “You two look wonderful! Have you been eating well?”

 

Behind her were five men dressed in a suits too tight for them making those ripped muscles evident in plain sight. Kyungsoo clears his throat, embarrassed when he meet eyes with a Latino man that’s standing beside the pillar with that sexy grin. Oh, good lord. Why is everyone here so goddamn attractive?

 

“Okay, you promised.” Mr. Park interrupts. “You said you’ll dismiss them on a vacation leave for a year when our sons arrive. Go do it.”

 

Mrs. Park gasps, feigning surprise. “I did not say a year! You know how the boys can’t live without me.”

 

“Oh, you know fully well that’s bullshit!”

 

Kyungsoo sighs.

 

This is going to be a long stay.

 

 

 

 

 

That evening, Baekhyun accompanied Joonmyeon in a reunion party his cousin threw for them. Every year, they gather around to meet and talk, have fun and catch up on their daily lives. Though, some were just flaunting their riches and status for everyone to see and envy.

 

He sees Kim Ahyoung, a model turned actress, talking to another cousin of Joonmyeon, Kim Dongjun, smiling brightly at her while trying to stop his female companion from hanging off his arm like a leech. There’s Dasom flaunting her 8 karat diamond ring and amongst them was Heechul looking bored as ever.

 

Kim Seokjin is with his husband, Kim Namjoon, and beside the former is his brother, Taehyung. They look like the power couple that the media have described them to be and the way how Namjoon is holding to his husband’ tenderly is enough for people to burst in jealousy because _why can’t their partner be like that to them?_

 

A tug on his hand is enough to pull him out of his daze.

 

“Hey, you okay?”

 

Baekhyun blinks dumbly and nods, smiling. “Yeah.” He squeezed their intertwined fingers together. “I’m good.”

 

Joonmyeon smiles upon hearing this and continues to lead him to the buffet table. Some people he recognize would flash a smile and greet him when they pass by while others flat out ignore him. Baekhyun doesn’t mind anyways. If there’s anything he hates, it’s conversing with fakes. So he keeps himself occupied at the food near him while Joonmyeon talks with his cousins, exchanging pleasantries and shares a few laughs with them.

 

Then all of the sudden, Joonmyeon cups his hands over his mouth and shouts. “Jongin!”

 

Baekhyun froze.

 

The tanned male turns at their direction and grins when he sees them.

 

Ever since that revelation about Jongin dated Kyungsoo back at college, Baekhyun can’t help the curiosity seeping in. Questions like - how did you two met? Where did you meet? What was Kyungsoo like in college and why did you two break up? - kept swirling in his head endlessly as he watches the younger male coming to approach them.

 

“Jongin, hey.” Joonmyeon greets his cousin with a huge smack on the shoulder and a hug. “You said you’d call when you come here. How come I didn’t heard anything from you then?”

 

“Oh, sorry. I guess I forgot?”

 

He playfully holds Jongin up – not that it affected the younger male anyways since he’s basically taller than them – and shakes him rapidly. “Ah, you bastard. How could you?”

 

They talked a lot, catch up at the things that they missed between each other. The two of them are actually huge gaming nerds, something that he can’t relate to – well, he is a gaming nerd but in PC’s while Joonmyeon is a fan of playing games in consoles. They talked about the release of Final Fantasy XV and about that unsatisfying ending, about what’s better: FFVI or FFIX, when will KH3 be released and other upcoming games to come this year.

 

Baekhyun just watched. The only time he talked then was when Jongin greeted him and expressed his happiness for coming here. In this big party filled with big-ass people in a big-ass career, Baekhyun feels small. Sure if it were the bragging rights, he’s got a chance but the people in here all knew each other. Whether it’d be fake or not, they connect about something. It’s like being a new student with no friends to be with.

 

So you can’t blame him if Baekhyun’s mind drifted back to his dilemma.

 

Jongin is sex on legs in a figurative sense. He’s innocent, charming and has that cute little boyish smile plastered on his face but at the same time, he’s oozing with sex appeal and a look that says _give me five seconds and I’ll have your undies down on the floor, rawr._ He can’t help but think that yes, it’s impossible for Kyungsoo to resist those charms. He must have had sex with him too… lots of sex.

 

Baekhyun feels gloomy all of the sudden.

 

Joonmyeon was gone when Baekhyun got back from the bathroom. He sees Jongin standing there, nursing a champagne flute, taking light sips as he does. For the first time, it’s going to be awkward and he knows Jongin might notice considering they got along really well back when the last time he visited. Taking a deep breath, Baekhyun makes his trek towards the younger with a smile ready on his face.

 

“Hi.”

 

Jongin grins. “Oh, hey. Joonmyeon-hyung got dragged over there,” He points at said man who’s talking with Boa and Seokjin near the mini-bar. They’re engaged in a serious conversation, it seems. Best not to disturb. “So how’ve you been?”

 

“Pretty awesome.” Baekhyun slowly nods, eyes straying away. He tries not to, though. “I’ve been busy, though. Work can be a pain.”

 

“Ah, I’ve heard about that.” Jongin snaps his fingers and points at him. “That new building your company is building in Malaysia. That’s great.” He grins when Baekhyun nods in affirmation. “Hyung told me about this you know. Can’t stop talking about you, honestly. Baekhyun this – Baekhyun that. Ugh.” He places the glass down on the table beside them after finishing his glass.

 

Hearing this made him blush. He knows Joonmyeon’s been talking about him and their relationship but hearing this to a person first-hand makes Baekhyun’s cheeks burn. He bites his lower lip, embarrassed, and shyly casts his gaze down. “Ah, really?”

 

“And it’s a surprise really, to know that the lead engineer in your upcoming project is Landon Park.”

 

Baekhyun looks up, gaping, staring at Jongin dumbly. “Huh?”

 

“Landon Park, Park Landon? Hyung told me you two already met back at London.” Baekhyun politely declines the champagne glass offered to him by the waiter so Jongin decided to take it instead. He makes a face after taking a nip. “Oh, wow… this is strong.”

 

Even if the person isn’t there, just hearing the name is enough for his heart to thump hard against his ribcage. He can’t hear it, though, but he can feel it like it’s bursting to come out. Baekhyun licks his lower lip and gazes at the champagne glass Jongin’s holding, wishing that he should have accepted that instead.

 

“We used to date, me and that guy. Hyung and he were sophomores then when I first met him.” Jongin recounts, tracing the rim of the glass with his index finger. Baekhyun’s heart pounds as he listens. “After breaking up, we agreed on staying friends but I guess it’s too awkward to hang out after that so I kind of… avoided him? Or he avoided me.” Jongin furrows his brows and hums. “I don’t know.”

 

If Baekhyun felt awkward then, he feels twice as much now. It’s either Jongin’s acting ignorant or the kid’s just plain oblivious at how Baekhyun is so uncomfortable. Despite that, however, there’s a part of him that wanted to know about what happened.

 

He didn’t need to ask questions because Jongin is already narrating everything. The younger’s face is turning pink. A lightweight, huh?

 

“Landon’s not that showy and flashy before, you know.” Jongin takes another sip. “Top 12 on Glamour’s sexiest men? Pfft…” He waves his hand and giggles. “The first time I met him, he was as skinny as a skeleton. It’s so frightening.”

 

Skinny? Baekhyun remembers the last time he saw Kyungsoo and sees how he’s far from being _skinny._ He looks healthy – too healthy to be even distinguished as slim. Jongin downs his glass and scratches his hair, eyes closing as he does. “Now that I thought about it, what did I even saw in him to like him so much?” He sighs and looks at Baekhyun, lips quirking in a small smile.

 

“But I have to admit, it was amazing… being with him like that.” Jongin said, eyes cast down. He looked sober but his body language tells otherwise. He keeps on flexing his fingers as he speaks, recalling every bit of memory. Baekhyun doesn’t know what to feel: curious or envious that Jongin got to spend university life with Kyungsoo – something that Baekhyun had always wanted.

 

“Now that I think about it, the reason why I liked him so much then was probably because of pity.”

 

“Pity?” Baekhyun echoes, eyes narrowing.

 

Jongin sets his lips in a firm line. “He kept telling me stories of his life back in Korea, memories with this person that he can’t get over with no matter how hard he tries – it’s kind of annoying now that I think of it because that person’s all he ever talked about when he got drunk one time.” Then he pursues his lips. “Something about a first love?”

 

Baekhyun’s heart thumps upon hearing this and his fingers clenched by instinct.

 

Jongin sighs and looks up at the sparkling chandeliers at the ceiling. Baekhyun, however, kept his gaze down. “Probably why we broke things off, huh?” He bitterly chuckles. “Two years after we broke up, however, I asked him if there’s a chance that we’d get back together again. He said no – told me that he’s done running away. Three weeks after that, he left to go back to Korea.”  

 

Baekhyun suddenly felt chills running down his spine, like someone had just splashed him cold water from behind and the harsh cold night gusts hitting his back furiously. He gulps hard, unable to move – petrified, he’s petrified.

 

“We didn’t meet again after that, but if there’s one thing that I know is that he changed.” Jongin said with a slight frown. “Ever since he got back from Korea, something was off about him.” He hums and purses his lips. “I couldn’t put a finger to it, though.”

 

“Jongin…”

 

Said male raises his brows and looks at him, smiling. “Hmm?”

 

“When was that exactly?”

 

“Oh, uh…” He ponders for a moment, folding his arms across his chest. “I forgot the specific date but it’s around 2013.”

 

The year he started dating Joonmyeon.

 

As Jongin continue to dive into other topics, Baekhyun’s mind swirls at the recent discovery of Kyungsoo coming back to the country. The fact sinks in and it made his chest clench in the most painful way just as a series of _“what if’s”_ began to invade his head.

 

Fuck.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lunch at the Park manor is lively. It consist of Yura and Chanyeol’s bantering and their Mom’s whines about the staffs going on a week leave. Their Dad is quietly taking light sips on his soup with his spoon, ignoring his wife’s ridiculous reasons while Kyungsoo watches his step-siblings in amusement.

 

Seeing how chaotic things is already becoming, Mr. Park gently taps the table to call their attention. “Now that we’re finally all gathered here, I wanted to tell you something… specifically Kyungsoo.”

 

Almost immediately, Chanyeol and Yura stopped, their attention now on their father. Also Mrs. Park, who’s expression melted into a serious one. Kyungsoo dabs a napkin on his mouth after drinking water.

 

“What is it?” He asked.

 

“You know President Do, right?” He said. “Son of the founder and owner of Logitech Corporation.”

 

Kyungsoo slowly nods. Hardly no one doesn’t know about him – he’s a tycoon, an elite. That old man who is famous for admitting of his affairs and acknowledging the rumors of him fathering a few children out of marriage. Apparently, that’s common for rich men like him – a fact that Kyungsoo finds disgusting.

 

Chanyeol raised a brow. “Is it another project? You do know Kyungsoo’s already got an on-going one, right?” He looks at his brother before grinning at his father. “How about I take it?”

 

“Oh, it’s not about that, but even if it was, I wouldn’t give it to you, boy.” Mr. Park huffs. “You already have five projects on-going, are you planning to kill yourself?”

 

Yura raised her hand. “Oh, can I help with that?” Chanyeol hisses.

 

Mrs. Park chortles.

 

Mr. Park clears his throat. “Anyways,” He looks at Kyungsoo. “Apparently, President Do is already thinking of retiring and he’s currently looking for a perfect candidate to be a successor.”

 

Kyungsoo furrows his brows. “And that concerns me why?”

 

“Because…” Mr. Park folds his hands on the table and looks at him solemnly. “He’s looking for his grandson - the son of Do Jangwoo and Jang Nari.” Kyungsoo stiffens upon hearing those names. They’re names that he chose to lock deep with his memories of his younger years – two of the names that brought salty tears on his face once upon a time.

 

Upon hearing this, everyone became mum, never speaking, finding their plates entertaining. If his father thinks this is good news, then it must be opposite day. It’s far from being good, too appalling to be even called great. Kyungsoo’s jaw clenched. He doesn’t know if what’s worse, remembering the pain of losing his parents or knowing that he’s related to that dirty bastard.

  
“Why me?” Kyungsoo utters. “That man has a lot of relatives scattered around the world, of all people, why would he chose me?”

 

Mr. Park furrows his brows. “What do you mean? Aren’t you glad that –“

 

“That man disowned my father so technically we’re not family anymore.” Kyungsoo cuts harshly. “And we’re not things. He never acknowledged us before. How come when he needed me is only when he’ll find me?”

 

His father sighs, closing his eyes momentarily and looking at Kyungsoo tenderly. “Son, I know how this is too much to take, but believe me… your grandfather looked for you. Ever since your parents died –“

 

“Ever since my parents died, the family that took me in was this one.” He slams his hands on the table. He hears his mother calls his name out soothingly but he ignored it, rage filling his system rapidly. “If he really did looked for me, then he would have done so easily.” He curls his fingers, nails gritting on the mahogany table. “But even if he did, it would have been an insult to me.” He mutters.

 

“President Do arranged a meeting with me three days ago and he told me that he wanted to meet you. If you could just give him a chance…” Mr. Park sighs. “No one is fit to fill in your grandfather’s shoes, but you.”

 

“He’s not my grandfather.” Kyungsoo snaps. “And I’m not a Do anymore.”

 

The chair scraped when he pushed himself out and stands up. “I’m a Park.” Kyungsoo said in finality. “Tell him to get it through his thick stupid brain.” Without another word, Kyungsoo turns on his heels and exits the dining room, shoes clacking against the marbled floor.

 

Mrs. Park’s forehead creased in worry. “Kyungsoo!” She calls and is ready to follow but stops when her husband grabs her wrist and shakes his head. Yura sighs.

 

“I’ll go check on him.”

 

 

 

 

 

Joonmyeon giggles drunkenly when they got in said man’s apartment. He’s getting touchy, too. His hands never left Baekhyun’s waist as he unlocks the door of his penthouse. Baekhyun fidgets as Joonmyeon leans on to his side, feeling hot breathe fan against his neck and warm hands trying to find its way inside his dress shirt.

 

“Joonmyeon, hey.” Baekhyun’s breath hitched when he feels something wet and cold on his ear. Joonmyeon’s fingers are reaching over him, fumbling over the buttons of his dress shirt one by one and every drag of it makes him shudder. “W-Wait…”

 

“I want you.” He breathed. “I want you so bad.”

 

Baekhyun inhales sharply when Joonmyeon leans over to nip on his collarbone, his hair pressed against his cheek as he gently pressed him against the wall. Joonmyeon smells of red wine and his strong perfume that imparts a pleasant smell.

 

“H-Hey… just –“ Baekhyun lurches forward when Joonmyeon latches his mouth on his nipple, his tongue tracing the tip before giving it light sucks, eyes trained on him as he does making him blush hard.

 

Baekhyun cards his fingers against soft raven hair, pressing his head against the wall as he feels Joonmyeon’s ministrations. Joonmyeon is careful and he treats Baekhyun like a fragile glass, sweet and caring and always asking if everything feels good. To his opinion, however, he doesn’t need to ask that because everything that he does is **so** amazing.

 

Joonmyeon pulls his head down for a heated kiss before continuing his trail below, mouthing the obvious bulge on Baekhyun’s pants. Baekhyun immediately has his hands pressed against the wall, steadying him because he thinks his knees are already on the verge of giving in.

 

Baekhyun shakes his head and Joonmyeon pulls up before the man could unbuckle his pants. He kissed him, just a brush on his lips so tender and soft. “Bed.” He breathes, moving in to suck his bottom lip. “Now.”

 

Clothes were discarded along the way, their lips never leaving each other. Even when Joonmyeon is prepping him, he kisses him, asking him if it feels good or if it hurts. And as always, Baekhyun says no because Joonmyeon… Joonmyeon never did anything to hurt him. He never did. It’s always – It’s always him that hurts the latter.

 

Joonmyeon groans when he’s completely inside, holding Baekhyun tenderly while staring into his eyes, his cheeks flushed and kiss swollen lips slightly parted.

 

He can feel it – Joonmyeon’s pulsating member inside him as he pounds hard producing wet slapping noises mixing with Baekhyun’s nasally moans in the background. Baekhyun finds pleasure at the way his tummy drags against his dick producing the delicious friction he oh so craved. He threw his head back and drawls a moan.

 

“Baekhyun.”

 

“H-Huh?”

 

Baekhyun gasps when he finds himself eye to eye with Kyungsoo. Soft raven hair wildly tousled and sweat glistening his body, Kyungsoo looks so breathtaking against the soft orange glow of the lamp. Delicately, he runs his fingers through soft tufts from the back, pulling him close until their lips meet into a slow and passionate kiss.

 

When he pulls away, he’s looking in his eyes and it makes Baekhyun’s heart pound. Kyungsoo looks so beautiful… so, so, amazing. How he missed him so much, how he wants to hold him again. He wants to tell him this but instead, he’s going to say the words that he’s been dying to say.

 

“I love you.” He whispers, pulling him in again to kiss him. This time, chastely. “I love you so much.”

 

Kyungsoo smiles warmly and holds his hips, pulling it harder in every snap. Baekhyun cries at the sensation that it wasn’t long before he feel heat pooling low in his abdomen, jerking in surprise at the string of cum shooting against his stomach. He whimpers at the aftershock, dick throbbing as he catches his breath. Then minutes after that, Kyungsoo reaches his peak, hips stuttering as he fills him to the brim.

 

“That… was hot.”

 

Baekhyun blinks lazily and turns his head, meeting eyes with Joonmyeon.

 

He froze.

 

Joonmyeon is looking down on him with a very happy smile, gently thumbing Baekhyun’s cheek while he moves his hips languidly. “You took me by surprise, really.” He leans down to kiss him on the forehead and chuckles. “I love you, too.”

 

Baekhyun returns the smile but inside, he’s screaming. How could he think of someone else while he’s being intimate with his fiancé? Thinking back, what he did is disgusting. It’s a disgrace – inappropriate and downright unforgivable. But at that moment, he can’t help but think how much pleasure he felt thinking of Kyungsoo – fantasizing of Kyungsoo being inside him and kissing him and holding him like this. It made his heart skip – he feels excited even.

 

Baekhyun never got to sleep that night.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> belated HAPPY BIRTHDAY SEAHOON  
> LOLOLOLOL :)


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “When you’re young, you think everything you do is disposable.” Yura says after taking another swig. “You move from now to now, crumpling time up in your hands, tossing it away. You’re your own speeding car! You think you can get rid of things, and people too – leave them behind. You don’t know yet about the habit they have of coming back.” She looks at him then smirks. “You can never get away from where you’ve been, Kyungsoo. Until you heal your wounds from your past, you will continue to bleed.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what is late? LOL

“Family sucks, right?”

 

Kyungsoo turns his head and sees Yura, his eldest step-sister, standing at the doorway of the balcony. She’s holding a bottle of wine and seeing as how she doesn’t have any glasses with her means that she’s not sharing. Typical Yura. Kyungsoo huffs and stares as she makes her way towards him. She looks like the complete opposite of that Time Magazine cover and how she looks so perfect on TV. He watches as her until she leans over the railing, her elbow on there while the other arm placed on his shoulder. Kyungsoo sighs.

 

“When has it not? I kind of understood why you left.”

 

“Hey, don’t get me wrong.” Yura scoffs. “I left because I’m a free bird. Partly because of Dad’s bullshits, but mostly because I wanted to travel.”

 

“I wish I had the same mindset as you are, noona.” Kyungsoo said, looking down on his fingers gripping the cream rails. “I’ve… I’ve always felt like I’m trapped in a cage. Even if I’m far away, it’s like there’s a chain attached on my leg hindering me from leaving.”

 

“You talk like you’re carrying the world on your shoulders.” Yura blew a raspberry before taking a swig, making a face after swallowing. She gave his shoulder a gentle shake. “You know, Dad was just looking out for you. He probably thought you’d be thrilled to find out that you still have someone in your family left. You should talk to him later.”

 

“Not like I can escape him.” Kyungsoo shrugs her hand off and groans. “All I wanted is to live my life and move forward, you know? But no matter how hard I try the past always catches up to me and kick me hard on the ass.” He continues to groan, stopping when he hears his sister chuckle.

 

“When you’re young, you think everything you do is disposable.” Yura says after taking another swig. “You move from now to now, crumpling time up in your hands, tossing it away. You’re your own speeding car! You think you can get rid of things, and people too – leave them behind. You don’t know yet about the habit they have of coming back.” She looks at him then smirks. “You can never get away from where you’ve been, Kyungsoo. Until you heal your wounds from your past, you will continue to bleed.”

 

Kyungsoo should have known how Yura can be so fast to pick up on something. After all, she’s the first person he opened up to all of his troubles – not his father nor mother and even Chanyeol. There’s just something about Yura that makes you spew everything to her like even if you didn’t, she’d still read you like you’re an open book. Even after all these years apart, Kyungsoo still couldn’t hide anything to her.

 

“Quoting multiple book lines just to prove a point, really noona?”

 

“But admit it, it hits you straight in the chest, huh?” Yura winks before taking another swig. She downs it in ease, growing used to the bitter taste. “You told me you were going back to Seoul, I expected that you met your neighbor.”

 

Kyungsoo looks at her in disbelief. “Did you do this on purpose?”

 

“Do I look like the person who involves in someone else’s affairs?” Yura deadpans. “Though I admit at first, I didn’t know he was my neighbor and when I did, I was expecting for you to come across him once or twice in the past on your stay at my place. Just when I’m starting to forget, it happened. Wowie.” She lowly whistles. “You two okay now?”

 

Kyungsoo shakes his head. “Talking to him now is hard. I thought finding closure would be easy but I underestimated our situation. But I think this is for the best. He’s getting married after all. Baekhyun’s happy.”

 

“What if you were wrong?”

 

Kyungsoo turns to Yura, surprised. “What if everything you believed was a lie? What if you missed your opportunity because you didn’t know your worth? Would you regret ever taking this path in life, Kyungsoo?”

 

“Knowing that he’s in the right person’s arms isn’t worth regretting. He’s happy and that’s all that matters.”

 

Yura places her chin on her palm, leaning on the railing and giving him an amused look. “But what is it that you truly want?”

 

And that is enough to make him stop. The lies and façade he’s making is cracking and it’s embarrassing that it’s in front of Yura. Kyungsoo runs his fingers through his hair and looks away, trying to ignore the terrible clenching pain in his chest. It’s not about family anymore. That issue only added to his major stress of what he left in Seoul. Like a shadow it’s always there, lurking behind and never letting him go.

 

He’s startled at the soft nudge coming from his hand and there he sees the dark green bottle of wine Yura has been drinking. Kyungsoo looks at the bottle before shifting his eyes to Yura. “You look like you needed some.” She said.

 

Cracking a small smile, Kyungsoo takes it and takes a swig – a huge gulp that made him cough at the burn travelling down his throat. Yura looks at him, amused.

 

“Good luck.”

 

 

 

 

Kyungsoo has been out of the country for almost a week now and Baekhyun finds himself unknowing of what to do. Revelations kept on spewing out of nowhere, unexpected and surprising that even before he could even process the current one, he’s been swept away by another one. First, it started with finding out that this _Landon Park_ is actually Do Kyungsoo, who’s apparently his fiancé’s best friend slash roommate in college and ex-boyfriend to said man’s cousin, Kim Jongin. Rewinding back, he found out that there’s a minor possibility that Kyungsoo is the reason for a high profiled celebrity’s divorce, which is kind of confusing because Kyungsoo never does things like… maybe? But that’s not even that important.

 

Kyungsoo came back around year 2013 and he remembers Jongin saying, that he (Kyungsoo) is done running away resulting in the man going back to Korea.

 

“To find me?”

 

“Excuse me, sir?”

 

Baekhyun whips his head and meets eyes with his secretary, who’s waiting for any orders. Embarrassed, Baekhyun gives her a small smile and waves his hands in dismissal before turning to face on his computer, diving back to deep thoughts.

 

He’s not sure. He doesn’t want to assume, no, but somehow he can’t help but feel like that.

 

Hours passed and these questions still keeps on popping in his head that he finds himself reading the same line in the document over and over. Baekhyun runs his fingers through his hair and groans in frustration, catching his secretary’s attention once again. He could only give her a small smile and wave in dismissal, telling her to carry on as usual. This time, his secretary has had enough.

 

“I’ll go get you some coffee.” She says. “Work must be stressing you out.”

 

“Right, yes, sorry.” Baekhyun looks at her apologetically, albeit a bit guilty. “No cream? Thank you.” His secretary gave him a thumbs up before leaving and gently closing the door to his office. Baekhyun sighs.

 

There are a few people he knows that’s been close to Kyungsoo as Landon Park and that is his brother, Chanyeol, and the guy’s best friend, Joonmyeon. Baekhyun’s not that close to Chanyeol to ask him about Kyungsoo in a personal level and it would be so awkward to ask Joonmyeon. Baekhyun groans again at his inner turmoil. If not those two person, then who would he go to?

 

His thoughts were cut off by Joonmyeon sending him a message about when will he be free this week.

 

Baekhyun sighs.

 

 

 

 

 

It was one night when he’s been called back in their house for a dinner together as a family. Baekhyun honestly dreaded these kind of meet-ups but the only reason why he endured everything so far is because of his mother.

 

His mother had been the only one who supported him – from his dreams to his relationship with Kyungsoo. She’s the one who gave the first blessing when Baekhyun told her that he’s going to date Kyungsoo. Maybe the reason why she’s so desperate on searching for his future partner is because of the depressed state he was in back when Kyungsoo left him for no reason at all. That’s why Baekhyun could not complain if she prefers them rich and successful, fully knowing that his mother is just looking out for him.

 

She endured so much in her years being married to her husband. Like a bird in a cage, she can’t go out to travel and buy stuff on her own. Didn’t finish her studies because her husband refused to fund for her education. She was always belittled and looked down upon because of this and because of her beauty, she’s like a trophy wife to the man. Her family, Baekhyun’s grandparents, were poor and instead of marrying the person she loves, she was forced to marry her now husband because they wished for her to live with no problems at all. Not knowing that because of this, she grew dependent and afraid of being left alone. In this world, it’s only common for rich men to have affairs and Baekhyun had guessed his father met a few women outside of marriage.

 

It’s honestly one of the reason why he’s gay.

 

After parking the car at the front of the house, Baekhyun got out, taking off his glasses and hooking it on his dress shirt. Their old butler greets him with a warm smile and bows his head a bit after stopping in front of him. “Master Baekhyun, it’s nice to see you after so long.”

 

Baekhyun smiles and walks past him, eager to get everything over with. It’s just going to be dinner. He’ll sit down, nod and everything his father will say, smile at his mother and maybe give a few chuckles whenever his older brother would crack a joke. Just like always.

 

“Baek, you’re here!”

 

He just didn’t expect Joonmyeon to be here, too.

 

He sits next to said male, hiding how surprised he is and turns his plate over, letting his fiancé fill it with food. They were already in the middle of dinner when he arrived and Joonmyeon looks so happy indulging his mother in a conversation. Baekbeom, on the other hand, doesn’t do much and simply eats, looking too eager to go home already.

 

Throughout the whole conversation, Baekhyun tuned them out, focusing on his meal just like his brother. Sometimes he would entertain his father with answers coming from work and then lets Joonmyeon talk more. He’s always the talkative one, that guy. But somewhere in the middle of overseas and documents, he hears Joonmyeon say, “I’ve decided on a wedding date.”

 

“Oh!” Mrs. Byun claps her hands. “When will it happen?”

 

“It’s more of like a month than an actual specific date.” Joonmyeon leans back, blushing. “I wanted it to be somewhere in October. A fall wedding would be so wonderful.”

 

Baekhyun’s eyes widens upon hearing this.

 

“The sooner the better.” Mr. Byun grunts. “I don’t know what kind of silly reason you two have for putting the wedding on hold. You two have been engaged long enough. I say get married the month after this. It would be grand, I tell you.”

 

“Oh, but a fall wedding sounds beautiful, darling.” Mrs. Byun tells Joonmyeon with that pleased glint in her eyes. “I would like to talk to your mother about the preparations. She would be thrilled! This is so exciting.” She giggles. “Aren’t you excited, Baekhyunnie?”

 

Joonmyeon chuckles softly and looks at him, moving his hand to cover his stiff and frozen ones. It took a moment before he flashed a smile to his mother.

 

“Yeah.” He said. “Amazing.”

 

 

 

 

 

“Hey, you could just come with me.” Joonmyeon said once they were outside. “I’ll drive you home.”

 

“I have my car with me.”

 

“Then leave it here and just let them drive it to your place tomorrow.” There’s a hint of playfulness in his voice and gently, he gives his sleeve a tug. “Come on, Baek. Let’s go drop by to get that new cheese flavored ice cream they got. I bet that 24/7 mini-store is still open.”

 

“Joonmyeon, I have my car with me so can you just –“

 

Joonmyeon grabs his elbow and pulls him when he tries to move away. “Baekhyun, will you just –“

 

“I have my car with me and I’m going to use it to go home, alright?!”

 

Startled, Joonmyeon drops Baekhyun’s elbow as if he touched something hot. “Are you… mad? Did I do something that made you act like this or is this you venting on me again? Because Baekhyun, I swear to god I –“

 

“I don’t remember even agreeing on a specific date with you, Joonmyeon.” Baekhyun said, his jaw clenched. “Hell, I thought you were going to wait for me until I’m ready to get married. So what’s up with this fall wedding bullshit?”

 

“So how long are you going to make me wait, Baekhyun? Because believe me, I’ve waited long enough – hey.” Joonmyeon stalks after Baekhyun when he walks past him and storms through the parking, ignoring the stares they were getting from the other staffs outside. Not wanting to be in their business, one by one, they went inside the house. “Byun Baekhyun, stop right there and let’s talk!”

 

“We don’t have anything to talk about.”

 

“We have, actually. I wanted to talk to you about why you keep on pushing the wedding.” Joonmyeon frowns. “I asked you to marry me, you said yes. I thought we were okay with everything? What’s the problem, Baekhyun? Tell me. What’s holding you back?”

 

“No, I’m not…” Baekhyun holds the bridge of his nose. “It’s not –“

 

“You are. There’s something holding you back from marrying me. I want to know what it is.” Joonmyeon pushes on. “Tell me, is it because of work? You know I’m okay with your work. I know how busy it is and I completely understand. Are you scared? Or…” He furrows his brows. “Or is it because of _that_ person?”

 

Baekhyun shakes his head. “Look, let’s not talk about this anymore. I’m tired, you’re exhausted I can really see that, Joonmyeon. So let’s just please….”

 

“Baekhyun, tell me, are you still not over _that_ person? You’re first love?” Joonmyeon’s frown hardens. “Is it because of him, really? Are you having second thoughts on marrying me because you still love him, am I right?” He scoffs a laugh. “I mean, of course… how could you not replace that necklace after everything I gave you as a replacement?”

 

Joonmyeon is pushing him. He’s pushing him too hard on the brink of insanity but at the same time, he doesn’t realize that his thoughts and wants are finally being molded together for the first time. And then suddenly, everything is finally clear.

 

“Are you going to cancel the engagement just because I planned a fucking wedding, is that it? Or it because you still love him that’s why –“

 

“Yes, I want to cancel the engagement!” Baekhyun raises his voice over Joonmyeon’s.

 

Everything went still.

 

From confused to hurt, Joonmyeon looks at Baekhyun unknowing of what to do.

 

“W-What?”

 

“I’m sorry, but I don’t think I can… not right now. Not – I’m sorry.” Baekhyun takes off the silver band on his finger and places it on Joonmyeon’s palm before leaving, getting on quickly inside his car and driving past him, ignoring how Joonmyeon didn’t move from where he was standing.

 

 


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kyungsoo stands there and listens as his father keeps rambling on about Chanyeol and how childish he is despite his age and how Yura always sneaks in to steal one of his bottles of old liquor while he’s out. Mr. Park’s face is scrunched up, always does whenever he gets frustrated, and the way he would wave his arms about like a little kid complaining to his mother. It took him years before he realized that this ramblings is just Mr. Park trying to stray away from the serious topic. Mr. Park isn’t that great with confrontations and tends to run away easily.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> unbeta'ed

The morning before he left, Kyungsoo decided to go to his father’s study room. It was supposed to be the night after dinner, but then the wine got to him really fast that Yura gave him an ear for taking that much when he can’t even take it. Chanyeol even whined on breakfast claiming that he ditched him and Henry for booze night. So that morning, when the headache isn’t that much, he decided to follow Yura’s advice and talk to him before leaving.

 

Upon hearing the door creak open, Mr. Park grunts, his eyes focused on his phone. He’s holding the device like it’s a fragile thing and uses his pointer finger to navigate through the screen – a sight that can be seen on most people in the old generation using these kind of devices.

 

“Chanyeol, if this is about that bumper you crashed last night then –“

 

“Wait, Chanyeol crashed a car?”

 

Mr. Park hums in surprise, snapping his head to look at Kyungsoo. “Oh, it’s you, Kyungsoo. I thought it’s your brother.” He immediately placed his phone down and stands up his swivel chair. “Yes, I told your brother never to drive intoxicated. Crashed right in front of our gate.” He waves his hands in dismissal, frowning. “I’m taking back that Camaro I gave him on his birthday. That kid will never learn.”

 

Kyungsoo stands there and listens as his father keeps rambling on about Chanyeol and how childish he is despite his age and how Yura always sneaks in to steal one of his bottles of old liquor while he’s out. Mr. Park’s face is scrunched up, always does whenever he gets frustrated, and the way he would wave his arms about like a little kid complaining to his mother. It took him years before he realized that this _ramblings_ is just Mr. Park trying to stray away from the serious topic. Mr. Park isn’t that great with confrontations and tends to run away easily.

 

“Dad.” That seems to stop Mr. Park from talking, staring at Kyungsoo with slightly wide eyes. “Let’s talk.”

 

“Oh.” Mr. Park blinks twice and settles down on his swivel chair. “Okay.”

 

Mr. Park looks awkward, like a little kid caught doing something he wasn’t supposed to only with grey streak of hairs and a wrinkly face. He licks his lips and leans his arm on his desk, pushing his phone aside with his finger and then cleared his throat.

 

“About last night –“

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

The two of them stopped midway on talking, staring at each with wide eyes. Kyungsoo looks down and laughs with Mr. Park slightly turning away to cover his smile. When the silliness of it all passes, his father looks at him with that fondness in his eyes. “Look, I’m not pushing you out of the family, Kyungsoo. If I made you feel that way, I’m sorry.” He sighs. “Your mother and I talked about it afterwards and we both agreed that what I’ve done is way out of the line.”

 

“It – It’s okay, Dad.” Kyungsoo shakes his head. “I was just… surprised.”

 

“It’s never okay, son.” Mr. Park said in that deep and gruff voice. “I made you feel uncomfortable and it’s wrong for me to force you to accept something you don’t want. I just thought…” He sighs again. “I thought you’d be thrilled to find out that you still have someone left in your family. I expected you to be happy about it but then you freaked out… it’s really surprising. Your mother had been upset with me the whole evening.”

 

Yura was right – she’s always right, who is he kidding? He’s not the type of person who would do that. Not the type of person who’d enter another person’s personal affairs, either. But still, he took the leap and did it because he thought of Kyungsoo. Not the money from being the heir or the benefits that comes along with it. It’s all just for him.

 

“You’re always going to be my son.” Mr. Park said with a smile. “And my priority will always be my children so if it makes you uncomfortable, I’ll cancel every meeting with President Do. I’m –“ He pauses to get his phone on his desk. “I’m already doing it, you know? See?” He scrolls with his pointer and lets Kyungsoo see. “See? I’m rejecting it.”

 

Kyungsoo chuckles at the sight.

 

Before he left, his mother pulled him in a tight embrace, giving his shoulders a squeeze before smoothening his button down shirt over and over to make him look presentable. He briefly remembers the first time she did this was when he’s on his way to his first thesis defense. They’re not officially a mother and son then but the feeling was there. Kyungsoo’s heart blooms at the nostalgia.

 

“Kyungsoo, my dear child. Wherever you go, always remember that your father and I love you, alright?” She said in her soothing and gentle voice. “I may not be the one who gave life to you, but life gave you to me. And as long as you are living, you listen to me – don’t ever think that you’re alone.” She smiles. “If things get tough, always know that you have a home to come back to.”

 

Kyungsoo chuckles. “Mom, I’m not… upset anymore.”

 

“You’re not upset in this moment, yes, but what about tomorrow or the next day or the next time?” Mrs. Park dusts his shoulder and gives him a gentle pat on the chest. “You think you’re great at hiding your emotions but you’re not. Don’t pretend, Kyungsoo. I didn’t teach you to be a fake.”

 

Somehow those words pierced him through his chest – like that huge arrow on those funny cartoons. Kyungsoo winces and slowly nods. “I’ll keep that in mind, mother.” He leans to kiss her on the cheek. “I’ll call you when I arrive.”

 

“You should.” Mrs. Park snorts. “It’s what you’re supposed to do after all.”

 

He really feels blessed at the family he’s in now. They took him in even though he has nothing to offer and treated him like one of their own even if they had a choice not to.

 

 

 

 

 

The aftermath of what happened was a disaster.

 

The first one who had bombarded him with messages and calls had been Joonmyeon’s mother. She’s a chatty person, that woman, and a handful. He often wonders how her husband got to endure her over the past years and he could only pity him. Jongdae left a few calls and a message after the fifth asking what’s going on. Minseok leaving two messages asking is he okay and if he ever need something don’t hesitate to call. But what really got him cracking was his mother’s message to him.

 

_Do you want to talk about it? I won’t let your father know._

Out of all messages, Baekhyun chose to respond to his mother, fingers shakily tapping out his reply to her.

 

When he sees her waiting at the little booth at a small diner outside of the city, Baekhyun immediately wrapped her in a tight embrace, basking in the warmth and that smell of honey-lemon perfume she always wears. He hears her sigh and move her hands on her back, rubbing them in a soothing manner like she did when he was a kid and he got hurt because he scraped his knee.

 

“Are you gonna scold me, mom?”

 

“For hurting Joonmyeon’s feelings, I should.” Mrs. Byun said, pulling away. “But I know you, Baekhyun. You don’t do something without a reason so I want you to tell all about it.”

 

So he told her everything leaving the part where he found out that Landon is Kyungsoo. The emotions were too overwhelming that he found himself tearing up once he finished. His hands were clenched in a fist and his jaw clenched, trying so hard to hold back tears from coming. It might not seem like a big deal to him, but every break up hurts either you’re the one who did it or the one who got slapped by it. He can’t help but feel horrible – by the time he told his mom everything, it doubled.

 

“As much as I hate it, I can’t force you to do something you don’t want to.” Mrs. Byun sighs. She finishes her cup of coffee, contradicting Baekhyun’s untouched one. “If you’re father found out, it will be a mess. If the media found out, it will get even messier.” She clicks her tongue in distaste. Baekhyun whimpers.

 

“Tell you what.” She taps the table with her forefinger, smiling. “How about I pull some strings and get you to fly to Kuala Lumpur the day after tomorrow? I’ll send the papers over and you let your secretary do the work. For now, I want you to relax and prepare for your upcoming flight.”

 

Baekhyun chuckles softly. “Thanks, mom. I… I don’t know what to say.”

 

“I’m just trying to do some early damage control, don’t get me wrong.” Mrs. Byun raises a brow but she’s smiling. “And even if I like Joonmyeon, you’re still my son. I’d still choose you over him.”

 

Baekhyun could only shake his head and laughs, finally taking his untouched cup and taking a sip.

 

 

 

 

 

“I’m really sorry, but my son doesn’t want to get involved with anything in your company.” Mr. Park said the night after Kyungsoo left. He’s locked inside his study room with his phone on his hand, talking to none other than President Do, Kyungsoo’s grandfather. After a lot of escaping, still, he could not run away from the man.

 

 _“Can’t you persuade him to talk to me? This is important, Park. You know this.”_ President Do said with his gruff voice. _“If I can’t get Kyungsoo to run this company, the Byun’s will be at it like a leech. They will take everything I’ve ever worked hard for and even take credit for the things you **did**.”_

“I tried.” Mr. Park answers. “And it only ended up with me damaging my relationship with my son. I believe I can no longer do what you asked me to do, President Do.”

 

President Do sighs on the other line. _“Fine. I’ll take this from here.”_ And before he could protest, the call ended between them. The old man can be stubborn, something that Kyungsoo picked up, and has a mind of his own. Once he made up his mind, it would be hard to make him change it.

 

Mr. Park could only sigh as he puts his phone down. “Good luck, son.”

 

 

 

 

 

It’s been a stressful week but he managed to survived, kind of. He dodged the bullet and although it’s a cowardly thing to do to escape the wrath of his father and hide firsthand, he thinks at this moment that it’s a very reasonable thing to do. He saw their father get angry at Baekbom once and it was scary. It got even scarier because Baekbom too has a pride as high as their father’s so it was like a clash between two Byun’s. Baekhyun made sure to leave out of it.

 

Baekhyun bows his head in thanks after getting the hotel key from the counter, politely declining the bellboy’s help on his things and proceeded to the elevator.

 

He’ll be staying here for a long while, he thinks, and he feels sorry for Jongdae and Minseok for not telling but it’s unexpected too. He didn’t think he’d be here and swap places with another staff in monitoring this company building. He’ll be sending reports and statistical progress towards the main office to update them about what’s happening. It’s like a half-load of his normal workload back at Seoul making him have enough time to relax. Baekhyun makes a note to send his mother a gift as thanks.

 

After leaving the elevator, he smiles at the hotel staff walking by that greets him a good evening. His room is 343 and he had to double check it before strolling for the right one.

 

He’ll take this time to relax, forget everything about past or present relationships and think about what path he is really going to take. His whole life he’d been so obsessed on finding Kyungsoo and talking to Kyungsoo about what happened eleven years ago that it affected his relationship with Joonmyeon. He doesn’t want that to happen again. As much as possible, he wants to move forward and focus on himself for the meantime.

 

Baekhyun slots the hotel key inside only to stop midway when the door next to him open revealing Kyungsoo, dressed in a blue jumper and a jeans ready to go out.

 

He stiffens, almost dropping the keys while Kyungsoo looks like he regrets coming out.

 

“Baekhyun…” He hears him whisper.

 

Baekhyun tries to lift his mouth in a smile but failed, only managing a grimace instead.

 

“H-Hey.”

 

This oddly feels like Déjà vu.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the world is becoming a scary place to live in now :(  
> like everyday, it's going worse than the last one. all we can do right now is pray and hope that these things would stop like WHAT THE FUCKING HELL?! WHY DO THEY HAVE TO DO THIS?!


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kyungsoo wanted to use this chance to relax and let everything bothering him to go settle at the back of his mind while he focuses on business for the meantime. Baekhyun, on the other hand, wanted to use this opportunity to escape and sort his shit together after breaking off the engagement with his longtime fiancé. To the two of them, coming here is the best path to take.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is long overdue. so sorry.

 

He doesn’t know why the deities keep on letting them meet like this repeatedly.

 

Kyungsoo wanted to use this chance to relax and let everything bothering him to go settle at the back of his mind while he focuses on business for the meantime. Baekhyun, on the other hand, wanted to use this opportunity to escape and sort his shit together after breaking off the engagement with his longtime fiancé. To the two of them, coming here is the best path to take.

 

Baekhyun clears his throat after being the first one to look away and quickly unlocks his door. Finally snapping out his daze, Kyungsoo does the same thing, hurriedly getting in his room.

 

The doors creaks open and slams close at the same time.

 

Oh, dear lord, why?

 

 

 

 

 

Kyungsoo prepared on going to work – his first day on the job as lead engineer. It’s going to be exhausting as hell.

 

“Good morning!” Kyungsoo bows his head in greeting and smiles when he turns to see the man with a bright white helmet hanging loosely on his belt. Even when he’s the one with the higher position (blue helmet) still, Kyungsoo does this. The man waves his hands in dismissal and bows his head in respect when he stops in front of him. “Ah, you must be sir Do. It’s nice to meet you.”

 

Kyungsoo accepts the hand, shaking it twice. “It’s nice to meet you.”

 

“I’m Eunwoo,” The man introduces himself. “Cha Eunwoo. I look forward to working with you, sir.” He bows his head again but Kyungsoo stops him.

 

“N-No, don’t call me that. Just…just Kyungsoo is fine.”

 

Eunwoo smiles, his eyes crinkling as he does. “I’m actually grateful, you know, that I ran into you. I thought I was gonna get in trouble since I’m already late.”

 

“Late?” Kyungsoo looks down on his watch, eyes widening in shock at the realization that he did not adjust his fucking watch. “L-Let’s go.” He walks past Eunwoo but stops in midway. “Err, where is the meeting room?”

 

Eunwoo chuckles softly. “Follow me, sir.”

 

“I said just…” Kyungsoo sighs. “Nevermind.” He mutters when Eunwoo walks past him.

 

The murmurs around the room stop the moment they entered. There were people sitting around the oval table in corporate attires, women and men alike in different age ranges and nationalities. But what caught his eye isn’t them…

 

“Baekhyun.” He unconsciously mouths. Baekhyun, who was staring swallows hard, but immediately looks down after a minute with of their eyes locking. Kyungsoo blinks away and settles his gaze at the other members.

 

Fuck. It’s not helping that he’s already staying at the room next to him. Now, he’s going to be a part of this project, too?

 

“Are we complete now?” The woman with a thick Australian accent said with a smile and an energetic aura. “Can we proceed with the presentation?”

 

Kyungsoo takes a deep breath and nods.

 

 

Kyungsoo is in front of him.

 

And fucking hell, he looks so good.

 

He’s wearing a black dress shirt tucked inside his dark slack and sleeves rolled up on his elbows. His raven hair still slightly wet probably from shower. Kyungsoo must have rushed to come here, no doubt. In front of him is a blue helmet, placed on the table.

 

He looks so focused and serious that Baekhyun feels embarrassed for being the only one feeling like this.

 

“And Mr. Byun will be overseeing the construction in his father’s place.” The woman with the accent is looking at him now. Baekhyun clears his throat.

 

“Umm, yes. That will be uh… my job.”

 

The woman nods and continues with her discussion, pausing every time someone asks a question. Baekhyun knows he should be listening because every point she’s making is very crucial, but still, he could not bring himself to not when his ex is sitting in opposite of him. Dammit.

 

He wants to talk to him but a part of him wants to run. Another part of him is disappointed that he’ll be working in the office while Kyungsoo’s mostly on site. They won’t be seeing that much the whole two months here save for the fact that they’re staying at the same hotel with rooms next to each other.

 

It’s like the forces of the universe keeps on pushing the two of them together. What, is this some kind of dollhouse?

 

Everybody stood up and leaves after giving their greetings after the meeting adjourned. Some on groups while some alone. Baekhyun didn’t focus his full attention on the man beside him, half of it on the younger male. He’s afraid that Kyungsoo will walk out on him once again when they’re all alone so Baekhyun took it as an opportunity to grab his elbow just as when he leaves.

 

Startled, Kyungsoo turns his head to look at him, surprised.

 

“Do you want to get some lunch?”

 

It’s unfair, if you see it at all angles because they’re still in the meeting room and there’s still a lot of people. Rejecting Baekhyun, the son of their employer, would be a bad start for him. Baekhyun knows this and yet, he took that chance as his advantage.

 

And just when a wave of happiness floods his system, another male hovered behind Kyungsoo with a bright smile.

 

“Can I join then?” The tall raven haired male points to himself.

 

And to make matter’s worse, “Yeah, of course.” Kyungsoo smiles at him. “Eunwoo-sshi, you know Baekhyun, right?”

 

“Ah, yes. Who wouldn’t?” **Eunwoo** holds his hand out for a shake. “Cha Eunwoo, Baekhyun-sshi. A pleasure to be working with you.”

 

“Right.” Baekhyun forces a smile and shakes his hand twice. “A pleasure.”

 

Kyungsoo isn’t looking at him and Baekhyun finds himself feeling bitter.

 

Well, looks like he’s just going to make Kyungsoo look at him then.

 

 

 

 

 

Joonmyeon enters Baekhyun’s office department with his chest heaving up and down rapidly. It’s a surprising sight to see how Joonmyeon, who always looks so neat and prepared looked like this… a mess.

 

Other employees noticed but didn’t paid any attention afraid that would only aggravate said man. Joonmyeon marches inside, eyes frantically searching for someone. He had no luck but instead, he sees Luhan, chattering with a female employee, casually leaning over the blue cubicle.

 

“Luhan.”

 

Said man did a double take when he sees Joonmyeon. With both brows raised, he gasps. “Joonmyeon!”

 

“Hey.” He grabs the other by the elbow and pulls him away from the cubicle. The female employee looks down on her work, not wanting to look like she’s eavesdropping. “Have you seen Baekhyun?”

 

“Oh, Baek?” Luhan raised a brow. “He went to Malaysia to supervise the construction of the new site. Didn’t he tell you? It was sudden, too.” He sets his lips in a firm line. “Told me to clear out his schedule then poof flies over there without even a word.”

 

Joonmyeon’s face falls. He really did all of those just to avoid him?

 

Luhan noticed his expression and slides his arm around the man’s shoulders, dragging him towards the direction of Baekhyun’s office. “Hey, Joonie.” He said in a volume only he can hear. “I don’t know what’s going on between you two, but I think it’s not that bad. You know how Baekhyun can be. He’s –“

 

“He broke off the engagement.” Joonmyeon takes Luhan’s arm off. “It’s that serious.” Then he left.

 

Luhan stills, eyes wide in surprise. “Huh?”

 

 

 

 

One minute, Baekhyun is all around him the next, he’s not.

 

It’s three in the afternoon and yet they were still at this small Korean restaurant near the building. Kyungsoo is already at his third wine when Baekhyun decided to go all “touchy” with the kid, his right arm draped on the headrest of Eunwoo’s chair while his other hand placed on the kid’s shoulder.

 

“So Eunwoo, what do you do?”

 

Baekhyun’s smile is inviting, borderline seductive and innocent and it seems like Kyungsoo’s the only one who notices because Eunwoo doesn’t look fazed. Either that, or he’s got the gist of what the older male is doing and is just riding the flow. Kyungsoo takes another sip.

 

“Mechanical Engineering.” Eunwoo smiles. “I graduated at University of Michigan. Almost failed, but thank God I pulled through.”

 

“You must be very smart then.” Baekhyun takes a subtle glance at him. Kyungsoo frowns. “Not everyone can pass that University. I heard it’s among the top 10 best universities in engineering.”

 

“Not smart.” The younger said. “It’s more of Hardwork and perseverance.” He chuckles. “And a lot of coffee and all-nighters.”

 

“Even then, what you achieved is admirable.” Baekhyun’s fingers are tapping on his shoulder. Kyungsoo takes another sip of his wine. “Not anyone can accomplish that feat.”

 

Eunwoo’s smile is charming with a hint of gentleness in those black orbs. He looks like a child emitting an aura of a man – Kyungsoo doesn’t like that. Eye to eye and an exchange of smiles that’s crossing acquaintances, hell, Baekhyun shouldn’t be acting like this especially when the older male has a fiancé back at home.

 

“Oh, but I heard Sir Do is an alumni at Oxford University.” Eunwoo gestures to him. “It’s a great feat – even greater than mine, obviously.” He smiles. “I actually used your thesis as a reference to my research. It’s amazing.”

 

“Really?” Kyungsoo blinks twice, current predicament momentarily forgotten. He feels a bit of pride upon learning that. And to think those all-nighters he pulled helped some students at another university. “Oh, uh…” He blinks rapidly, a smile blooming on his face. “That’s amazing… I mean, really?”

 

“Great job, Eunwoo-yah.” Baekhyun smirks. He pulls away from Eunwoo and places his hands on the table. “You successfully made Mr. Do’s ego inflate a bit.”

 

Kyungsoo raised a brow. “Hey, it’s not every day –“ He paused when he notices a certain silver band’s absence on the older male’s finger. His eyes went wide. “Byun-sshi…”

 

Baekhyun raised his brows, feigning nonchalance. “Hmm?”

 

“Have you… forgotten anything?”

 

Eunwoo looks at him then at Baekhyun in curiosity. Baekhyun, however, looks clueless for a moment. With lips pursed, he thinks then gasps. Kyungsoo thinks that maybe he finally got what he was pertaining at but then,

 

“Shoot, I need to file in my report for today’s meeting. The office must be waiting for it around now.” Baekhyun points at the back with his thumb. “I should head back first.” He smiles. “I’ll see you all tomorrow.”

 

Kyungsoo nods. Eunwoo waves. “Good luck, sir Byun.”

 

Baekhyun returns the wave before making his leave.

 

Eunwoo licks his lips and sighs. “So… shall we split the bill since –“

 

“No, I got it.” Kyungsoo waves in dismissal. He tunes down Eunwoo’s protests and arguments about how they should divide the bill to be fair. Instead, Kyungsoo succumbs to his thoughts of what Baekhyun is trying to do.

 

But let’s face it, he never does get what’s running on that man’s head.

 

 

 

 

 

Kyungsoo thought that maybe, it’s an honest mistake. Baekhyun never intended to forget his engagement ring and that he’ll wear it tomorrow for the construction workers’ orientation.

 

Wrong.

 

Baekhyun stood there giving his speech with a smile, his hand gesturing wildly as he speaks about motivation and improvement. _Ringless_ hand.

 

Yeah, okay… maybe Baekhyun forgot about it at home. Baekhyun isn’t the type of person to forget things that doesn’t add up. But hey, at least he’s telling people that he’s exclusive to someone back at home.

 

 _“You’re not getting any younger, Baekhyun.”_ An Irish man in his forties chuckles. _“But then again, I kind of understand what you’re getting at.”_

Baekhyun smiles. _“It’s easy to focus on the business when you’re single. And I don’t think I can commit to anyone especially when I travel all the time.”_ The Irish man agrees at this.

 

Apparently, he’s wrong again.

 

Kyungsoo clears his throat. “Byun-sshi, a word?” He empties his champagne glass before heading towards the balcony. After Baekhyun enters, Kyungsoo closes the glass doors, shutting any music from coming inside.

 

Baekhyun scoffs a laugh. “Oh, so now you want to talk?”

 

“Okay, what was that?” Kyungsoo gestures from the door. He follows Baekhyun with his eyes as the latter walks towards the rails. “What the hell have you been thinking?”

 

“Look, I really don’t know what you’re talking about.”

 

“Pretending to be single? Not wearing your engagement ring?” Kyungsoo follows after him. “Shamelessly flirting with the kid? What’s next, Baekhyun? Because goddamn, I don’t know what the hell –“

 

“I thought you don’t want anything to do with my life anymore, Kyungsoo.” Baekhyun cuts off, brows furrowed. He sees him gripping against the rails tight, knuckles turning white. “Aren’t we reduced to strangers again?”

 

“Joonmyeon is my best friend.”  

 

“So?”

 

Kyungsoo stills. Baekhyun cranes his neck before turning around to look at him. “What do you want me to do?”

 

Now, Kyungsoo is confused. The look of indifference and stoic expression on his face, this is the first time Kyungsoo sees Baekhyun like this. “You’re engaged.” He said. “You’re engaged to Junmyeon and what you’re doing is wrong.”

 

There was a long moment of silence.

 

Baekhyun furrowed his brows. “You know, Kyungsoo… ever since I saw you again, all I ever wanted to do is for us to talk. And here I thought you were on the same boat as me, but then I realized that I actually look pathetic running after you.”

 

“So okay, fine. You’ll get what you want. I’m done… running after you.” He approaches him, frowning. “That means, you don’t meddle on my life choices just as I don’t meddle with yours.” Baekhyun shrugs. “If I do those things, what it’s to you? You’re the best friend, right? Fine, tell him. See if I care.”

 

Kyungsoo’s jaw clenched.

 

“It was nice talking to you, _Do-sshi_.”

 

Baekhyun fixes his blazer and walks past him with a look of indifference. As he opens the door, music and chatters of people inside the event hall is heard and then it got blocked again when the door closed. The night air is picking up, sounds of cars from below ringing in his ears.

 

Kyungsoo drags a hand down his face and sighs.

 

 

 

 

 

Eunwoo bumps him gently on the shoulder making Baekhyun squeak in surprise, spilling a bit of his red wine on his glass. He places a hand on his chest and takes deep breaths, “Goddamit, Eunwoo.”

 

“Wow, you look tensed.” Eunwoo peers down on him. “You okay there?”

 

No, Baekhyun is not okay. He made the biggest gamble of his life and placed all of his bets on the table. Of course he’s definitely not okay. Nevertheless, he doesn’t let Eunwoo notice and instead, gives the kid an easy smile after taking a sip.

 

“Never been better.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> unbeta'ed but still, hope you liked this LOL


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There’s a difference between being professional and a cold hearted jerk and Kyungsoo is noticing that Baekhyun is acting like the latter. He can tolerate Baekhyun being an ass whenever they are alone together but acting like his engagement is nothing is definitely irking him. For god’s sake, Baekhyun is engaged to be married and he’s here hovering over Eunwoo like a fucking fly! He knows it’s not Eunwoo’s fault but sometimes he wanted to wrap his hands around the younger’s neck and choke him to death.

Baekhyun is acting like a piece of shit.

 

Just to Kyungsoo, that is.

 

There’s a difference between being professional and a cold hearted jerk and Kyungsoo is noticing that Baekhyun is acting like the latter. He can tolerate Baekhyun being an ass whenever they are alone together but acting like his engagement is nothing is definitely irking him. For god’s sake, Baekhyun is engaged to be married and he’s here hovering over Eunwoo like a fucking fly! He knows it’s not Eunwoo’s fault but sometimes he wanted to wrap his hands around the younger’s neck and choke him to death.

 

It wasn’t helping that Baekhyun is also giving him mix signals.

 

“The format of the contract is wrong.” He’s startled when he hears Baekhyun behind him. Slowly, the man leaned over, his chest pressed against his side as he looks at the document in Kyungsoo’s hand. “Mr. Sanchez is a long client of ours so I know how meticulous he is over contracts he signs. I’ll fix it for you.”

 

When Baekhyun takes the paper in his hand, their fingers brushed and it made his breath hitch. But pride and reality has Kyungsoo stepping forward and tries to ignore what happened. Though that proves to be a complete failure because Kyungsoo is weak for Baekhyun – in everything that he does so just the simple touch or press got his knees feeling jelly.

 

That was until Baekhyun straightens up and grins. “Eunwoo, you’re here!”

 

“Good morning to you too, Baek.”

 

Kyungsoo raised a brow. _Baek_?

 

“So you busy today?” He can hear Baekhyun bouncing on his steps towards the younger male and the other chuckling in delight upon seeing the older. “Because I found this blog and it’s filled with the best restaurants here in this area. Let’s try everything.”

 

“Definitely.”

 

The meeting room door closes leaving Kyungsoo sitting alone in the stillness of the room with conflicted thoughts.

 

Let’s not forget how Baekhyun also tends to avoid him like a plague. Like whenever Kyungsoo sometimes was left alone with Baekhyun in the meeting room or during the construction site overview, Baekhyun would avoid interacting with him. Kyungsoo thinks it’s for the best, but purposely ignoring him just to pour all of his attention to that kid, Eunwoo? Fucking hell.

 

He’s like the water in the shower in his college dorm, hot and then cold. Baekhyun would act so close to him one second and then the next, he acts like he doesn’t exist at all. The mix signals got Kyungsoo irritated to the core and it definitely wasn’t helping how Baekhyun is acting so close to Eunwoo.

 

Now that he thought about it, all of his angry thoughts contain Baekhyun and Eunwoo now.

 

Kyungsoo shakes his head and sighs. This is the third time in a row that he failed to get a good night sleep.

 

 

 

 

 

Aside from one night, Kyungsoo holes himself in the meeting room once again double checking the documents to be passed to the Byun’s tomorrow when the door opens revealing Eunwoo and Baekhyun tailing behind him as they laughed at something the younger said. Kyungsoo furrows his brows and tries to block everything out when all of the sudden, he feels a heavy tap on his shoulder.

 

“Hyung, let’s go out drinking tonight.”

 

_Hyung? Since when did I even permit you on calling me hyung?_

“I’m busy.”

 

“You are that’s why we’re gonna make you un-busy.” The brat snatched his folder making his well-hidden scowl appear on his face. “We’re gonna get a few drinks and let loose. You’re too stiff, hyung. We should go out and party since I doubt we can get to do this once the construction hits 75%.”

 

“Like I said earlier,” Kyungsoo frowns and snatches the folder once again on Eunwoo’s grasp. “I’m **busy.** ”

 

There was a long moment of tense silence because duh this is the first time Eunwoo witnessed Kyungsoo acting full stress mode.

 

Baekhyun huffs. “I told you not to ask him. He’s an uptight prissy. If we went over the club a few hours ago instead of coming here to get him, we would probably be having fun right now.” He complains.

 

Hearing that successfully strikes a nerve on Kyungsoo but he lets the duo leave the meeting room anyway. Kyungsoo rolls his eyes and frowns, continuing on working on advance so that he won’t get piled up in work later. Once 75% hits he’s going to have fun on his own anyway. Fuck them for procrastinating. It’s not going to be his problem later on.

 

But then thoughts of Eunwoo and Baekhyun having fun in a bar or a club got him distracted. He visions Eunwoo with his hands on Baekhyun’s waist or Baekhyun pulling Eunwoo by the shirt, their lips slightly touching as their heads washed away by alcohol to even think clearly about what they’re about to do. He thinks about waking up in the morning knowing that there’s something that might have had happened and he let that happened. He thinks about Junmyeon.

 

Kyungsoo shakes his head and continues working. Stop thinking, Do. Stop –

 

He thinks about Eunwoo and Baekhyun making out at the darkest corner of the club, intoxicated and wasted.

 

Kyungsoo did not even think twice. He grabs his coat and leaves.

 

 

 

 

 

“You came!”

 

Kyungsoo finds himself standing in front of Baekhyun drinking a shot called _blowjob_ and is looking at him with boredom written in those beautiful dark irises. Eunwoo is beaming at him like a child looking up at his birthday present and Kyungsoo is definitely not happy. “I’m here.” He deadpans. “What did I miss?”

 

“Baek-hyung was just here in the middle of a story.” Eunwoo grins at the older male. “Why don’t you continue while I give you another blowjob?”

 

Kyungsoo chokes on his spit.

 

“A blowjob would be nice.” Baekhyun smirks. “But I rather you give me a _screaming orgasm_ instead.” Eunwoo wiggles his brows then looks at Kyungsoo, who’s still standing there, unmoving and unknowing of what to do. He raised a brow. “What’re you standing there for, Park-sshi?”

 

“He’s going with me at the bar to get the drinks.” Eunwoo slides off the booth and stands up. He’s a lot taller than him and it painfully reminds him of whenever he’s with Chanyeol. “For the meantime, try hard not to miss me too much.” He winks.

 

Baekhyun wiggles his fingers later at him while Eunwoo laughs as he hooks an arm around Kyungsoo’s shoulder and leads him to where the bar is. Kyungsoo, on the other hand, is beginning to regret his life choices for even coming here. Fucking hell. There’s a lot of people here, too and Kyungsoo isn’t that great when it comes to people nor to socializing. Because in the sea of expensive looking people, he looks like a lost boy in a suit and tie. He should have loosened the tie and looked casual like Eunwoo and Baekhyun.

 

“What made you decide to come, hyung?” Eunwoo grins.

 

Kyungsoo wanted to ignore the male but upon seeing the younger pay for their drinks, he sighs. “I uh… thought about it and maybe, yeah… I think I need to loosen up.”

 

“That’s great!” Eunwoo chuckles. “Did you know that Baek is a great dancer? I see dance a few nights before and it’s amazing. It’s great that you’re here. You can finally see him in action. I swore that night, I saw some guys staring at him like he’s a piece of meat.” Kyungsoo frowns. He thinks he doesn’t need to hear that.

 

“Hmm…”

 

And just as Eunwoo had said, Baekhyun is a great dancer. Well, if dancing in the club consists of slowly grinding against a random stranger on the dance floor, body rolls mixing in with those smoky eyes and alluring smiles. Kyungsoo did not notice downing Eunwoo’s shot of vodka instead of drinking his bottle of beer at the sight. It’s definitely hard not even someone like Eunwoo to resist something as tempting as Byun Baekhyun. Just the thought of those nights Eunwoo mentioned with Baekhyun got him thinking so many possibilities. He frowns and sits there in silence, looking around and trying hard not to drown in the sight of Byun Baekhyun dancing.

 

“We’re not hooking up, if that’s what you’re wondering.”

 

That snapped him out of his thoughts.

 

“Huh?”

 

“Baek-hyung and I are just friends.” Eunwoo said. “We’re the only ones in this project who are in their mid-20, hyung.” The younger male smiles. “I think that explains a lot why Baek-hyung always prefers my company.”

 

Kyungsoo huffs. “Not to mention he’s engaged to be married.”

 

Eunwoo looks like he’s got something more to say but Baekhyun came back at their booth, smiling and completely flushed from the exertion and the rush. “Eunwoo-yah, let’s dance.”

 

“Oh, but I don’t feel like dancing.” The younger grins. “How about you take hyung as a dance partner?”

 

Kyungsoo’s eyes went wide. “I-I don’t dance.”

 

“Fine.” Baekhyun stares at him dead in eye. “Come dance with me, Park.”

 

He gulps hard. Oh, boy.

 

 

 

 

 

This was not part of the plan.

 

The plan was avoid Kyungsoo at all cost. Get him to come to him and then shut him out again and play around with him like a cat would do to a toy before moving on to something else. But no, that’s not what happened. He’s currently holding Kyungsoo’s wrists amidst the sea of people dancing in a fast EDM beat. The younger male’s hand is cold and but it’s soft and Baekhyun hates how his heart is making these small summersaults whenever he could feel his fingertips grazing his fingers.

 

When they stopped in the middle of the dance floor, Kyungsoo doesn’t know what to do.

 

“How do we d-do this?” He stutters.

 

Baekhyun smirks.

 

“Like this.” He whispers as he turns around and wraps his arms around his neck. “And this.” Slowly, he pulls him in until their faces are centimeters apart. Kyungsoo visibly swallows hard, their eyes locking into each other’s gazes. He finds pleasure in seeing Kyungsoo’s look of discomfort and he wanted to laugh out loud right there and then and mock him, but he couldn’t.

 

Not when he realizes how much he missed staring at those eyes like this close. It makes irrational thoughts disappear and it made him realize how petty he’s acting. They weren’t doing anything, just standing in the middle of the sea of dancing – grinding bodies. With his arms around Kyungsoo’s neck and their bodies flushed close and their faces, everything went deaf in their ears. He sees Kyungsoo’s brows furrow, eyes staring at him in worry.  

 

“You couldn’t sleep, either?” He whispers.

 

Baekhyun looks away. “What’s it to you?’

 

“You should take care of yourself, Baek.” The deep husky voice made him feel shivers creep through his skin. “Don’t push yourself too hard. I don’t want to see you overworking yourself.”

 

 _This_ is why this stupid plan is never going to work.

 

Baekhyun sharply lets go after feeling embarrassed at how easily that affect him. “I’m going back.” He said and walks away, leaving Kyungsoo standing there alone. He never expected Kyungsoo to follow him, though and grabs his wrist, stopping him. He hissed. “What?”

 

“If you’re going back, I’m coming with you.”

 

 _Stop doing this_.

 

“Fine, whatever.” He yanks his arm away and continues on his way.

 

 

 

 

 

Eunwoo isn’t replying so it’s either he’s out there still partying or he’s already back at his hotel room with someone else, Baekhyun’s not sure. All he knows is that Kyungsoo is following him on his trek inside his hotel room, even leaving the door open for the younger male to follow him inside.

 

(What the fuck was he even thinking?)

 

“I should… go.” Kyungsoo said after a while, fully assured that Baekhyun is okay. “Good night, B-“

 

“I thought the closure that I wanted was a sign that I don’t love you anymore that’s why I wanted to talk to you face to face. But every time I do, I can’t help but feel like that I’m just trying to convince myself that I’m over you even if I’m not.”

 

Baekhyun grits his teeth. He doesn’t want to look weak and desperate but right now, he’s baring his heart out to the younger. He’s passing the ball to him. He’s giving up.

 

“Because goddammit, Kyungsoo. Eleven years later, I’m still fucking in love with you.”

 

 

 

 

 

“I thought the closure that I wanted was a sign that I don’t love you anymore that’s why I wanted to talk to you face to face. But every time I do, I can’t help but feel like that I’m just trying to convince myself that I’m over you even if I’m not.” Baekhyun’s voice cracks at the end and it made Kyungsoo falter. “Because goddammit, Kyungsoo. Eleven years later, I’m still fucking in love with you.”

 

There it is, the words that Kyungsoo longed to hear. Kyungsoo has envisioned of this moment numerous times and all of them ended up with Kyungsoo tearing his walls down and kissing Baekhyun because he that’s what he wants. That’s what his heart longs for. But reality is always there to keep him from reminding of what he lost and Baekhyun is one of those. And it hurts because there’s nothing he can do about it. Eventually, Baekhyun will be with Junmyeon. They’ll get married, have a family and visit places that they’ve always dreamed off with their family. Junmyeon is the perfect man for him, even his family approves of that. Kyungsoo can never step up to his level.

 

“You know we can’t.” Kyungsoo finally answers. “And even if we both do, the situation dictates that we shouldn’t be.”

 

The silence is deafening but the sound of Baekhyun’s heart breaking is loud.

 

He doesn’t want to look at Baekhyun, afraid that his resolve will crumble down easily. So he turns on his heel and leaves the room without turning back. His feet carry him farther and farther away from Baekhyun’s hotel room, walking past his, wanting to escape harsh reality for a moment and drown himself in despair. Because the worst thing that happened has come true: they both know that they love each other but they still can’t be together.

 

He wanted to waste his life away – to forget. So he takes the elevator and leans, lost and for the first time, unsure of what to do.

 

Baekhyun loves him. He still does. Fuck. Kyungsoo runs his fingers through his hair. He wanted to laugh, delirious because now that he knows, how can he move on if he’s going to watch Baekhyun and his best at the altar getting married soon? He’s not gonna survive. Fucking hell, he’s gonna die.

 

The elevator door opens and he hears the ladies gossiping as they enter. They look Korean so they must be here on tour.

 

“Hey, did you hear that Byun’s son is in this hotel?”

 

“Are you serious? Wow, he must be here to hide. Everything’s going crazy there with the broken engagement and all. I don’t really understand what’s going on in his head.”

 

“I know, right? If I’m in his age and I’m engaged to Kim Junmyeon, I’d call the priest in a heartbeat. That man is so gorgeous and rich, to end an engagement with him is downright crazy.”

 

Kyungsoo’s eyes went wide.

 

Baekhyun ended his engagement with Junmyeon?

 

Suddenly, everything is starting to make sense. The reason why Baekhyun doesn’t want to talk about Junmyeon, the missing ring on his finger and his sudden presence in this whole project despite him being not the one who’s supposed to be here. Kyungsoo takes deep breathes and holds on the metal bar behind him to keep himself steady. Why did he broke it off? What the hell was he thinking? Is Baekhyun even in the right mind to –?

 

Kyungsoo stops himself.

 

Oh.

 

“Excuse me!” Kyungsoo flings himself forward and pushes the elevator button open so that he can leave, ignoring the mutters and exclamations of him being _rude_ by the two gossipers inside. Then he made a beeline to the other adjacent elevator and shoves himself inside, pressing the floor on where Baekhyun is staying in the hotel.

 

When he gets out, he’s out of breath and his mind is all a muddled mess. It’s shouting _Baekhyun, Baekhyun,_ and _Baekhyun._ He wanted to see the man, the walls slowly crumbling, Kyungsoo finally letting his body take control of everything. Upon reaching the door, he lifts his hand up and knocked frantically even if his fingers hurt from all the pounding. And when he heard the door unlocks, Kyungsoo holds his breath.

 

Baekhyun with his puffy eyes and red nose opens the door. He’s completely surprised when he sees Kyungsoo standing in front of him.

 

“K-Kyungsoo, what are you doing here? Did y-you forgot something or -?”

 

And then he’s kissing him. Once, twice, over and over because Kyungsoo knows he’s never going to have enough. Eleven years of longing and hurt lead to this and he’s not gonna wait any much longer. They only pulled away to breathe, a short pause before resuming. Baekhyun’s fingers weaved on his hair and his hands cupping his jaws and pulling him harder and deeper. Baekhyun groans lowly on this throat and that’s when he pulls him inside and closes the door behind him before they resume their hard searing kisses.

 

“I love you, too.” Kyungsoo whispers against his lips. “Eleven years later and I’m still fucking in love with you, too.”

 

Baekhyun didn’t respond but the smile on his face was more than enough. Slowly, he captures his lower lip in a teasing bite and kisses his mouth fully, tenderly as if afraid that everything is just a dream. And the feeling made Kyungsoo’s vein throb and his heart explodes.

 

Over and over again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is long overdue.  
> I feel embarrassed >.<


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Baekhyun can feel the blood run down his lower half upon hearing this. He doesn’t want to sound daring or even desperate because fucking hell, he wants Kyungsoo so bad too so he just meets Kyungsoo in the eye, purses his lips and then nods.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: failed smut ahead

When their lips parted to breathe, Baekhyun feels dizzy. He’s still not sure whether what is happening is a dream or a reality. If it is a dream, then it would have been a wonderful and yet, a cruel one because Kyungsoo is looking at him with those eyes like the ones when they were together in their younger days and Baekhyun can’t help but fall a little more in love with him then. Kyungsoo’s lips are swollen from all the kissing that they did and Baekhyun wanted to kiss him some more but the hands on his front shirt is stopping him from even closing the gap. He wanted to ask why but he stills when he hears Kyungsoo whisper,

  
“I want you.”

 

Baekhyun can feel the blood run down his lower half upon hearing this. He doesn’t want to sound daring or even desperate because fucking hell, he wants Kyungsoo so bad too so he just meets Kyungsoo in the eye, purses his lips and then nods.

 

It was the green light that Kyungsoo needed. In one swift movement, he’s hand him pinned against his bed, their foreheads touching as his fingers slowly unbutton each of his dress shirt. They weren’t kissing but Baekhyun wants them to be. He doesn’t think he can take Kyungsoo’s intense stare as he takes off all of his clothing. It makes him squirm. They still smell of beer and alcohol but it’s something that they both didn’t care not when Baekhyun is already down to his boxers and Kyungsoo already in the middle of getting his pants off. Fuck, Baekhyun really wants to kiss him again.  

 

Kyungsoo kisses his forehead instead. “If you’re going to fuck me –“

 

“I want you to fuck me.” He cuts him. Kyungsoo looks like the breath got knocked off of him but he still continues, his eyes lust blown, wanting to devour him.

 

“Okay.” He answers breathily. “If I’m going to fuck you, I need a condom and some lube.”

 

“We don’t need condoms, just lube.” He said reaching over the drawer table beside the bed and pulls out a small bottle. He can hear Kyungsoo’s breath hitch when parts his legs and beckons for Kyungsoo to come near him, inviting him in between his legs. When Kyungsoo is hovering over him, he pouts. “Why aren’t you kissing me?”

 

Kyungsoo chuckles softly and kisses him then. “Better?”

 

Baekhyun grins. “You’re gonna have to do more than that.”

 

 

 

 

 

Baekhyun throws his head back and moans as Kyungsoo delivers a hard thrust. Baekhyun feels warm and hot inside and the feeling is enough for Kyungsoo’s head to throb. He pants and continues his languid movements.

 

“Wait, it hurts.” Baekhyun rests his hand on Kyungsoo’s chest. “Just stay still for a moment.”

 

Kyungsoo dips his head down and kisses his forehead as an apology. “I’m sorry. I haven’t done it in a while.” Baekhyun shakes his head and wraps his arms around his neck and pulls him close until their foreheads are pressing against each other. He can hear Baekhyun’s quiet whimpers and whines. Kyungsoo heaves out a shaky groan.

 

“So this is what it feels like.” Baekhyun trails. “Inside me. This is what it feels like when you’re inside me.” He whispers. Kyungsoo lifts his head up and looks at him in the eye.

 

“I told you it’s okay to top me. It’ll be just like old times.”

 

“But I never get to…” Baekhyun groans when he moves, his grip around Kyungsoo tightens. “Fuck,” He shudders. “I never get to feel you inside me. It’s always me inside you and don’t get me wrong, I love the whole sensation but I also want to do this.”

 

Kyungsoo smiles at this and traces his fingers on Baekhyun’s cheek down to his neck. He fingers the buttons on the half-opened dress shirt and stops midway when he sees a silver necklace hiding inside. Kyungsoo furrows his brows and spreads the dress shirt open only for his breath to hitch when he sees the familiar necklace.

 

“You were serious when you said you always take this wherever you go, huh.” Kyungsoo said. The clef sparkles when he tilts it to the side. Baekhyun wraps his hand around Kyungsoo’s.

 

“I never joke on those kind of things.” Baekhyun closes his eyes and pulls Kyungsoo down. “Can you – You can move now, Soo. Please….” Kyungsoo nods against his head and slowly pulls out before thrusting in carefully. Baekhyun moans.

 

Kyungsoo moves slow and Baekhyun loves the feeling. With how careful he moves, Baekhyun can literally feel Kyungsoo moving inside. Every sensation feels hot and heavy that he can’t help but whine in every push and pull. He grits his teeth when Kyungsoo bites on his shoulder and he shouts a curse when Kyungsoo decided to be playful and wraps his fingers around his leaking shaft.

 

“Fuck, Kyungsoo.” Baekhyun looks down and blushes at the sight of Kyungsoo thrusting in and out of his ass. His view, however, got obstructed when Kyungsoo fists his shaft and thumbs his slit without warning. Baekhyun throws his head back and laughs. “Goddammit!”

 

“You feel good?” Kyungsoo whispers.

 

“I feel hot.” Baekhyun trails his fingers on Kyungsoo’s back – feeling the soft fabric of the younger’s navy blue dress shirt. “Take this off.” He whispers as he slowly pushed the clothing down until it’s on his elbows. Kyungsoo stops moving to shrug it off. When he did that, Baekhyun sits up and took this chance to take his off, too.

 

“Okay, just…” Kyungsoo lifts Baekhyun’s leg and places it on his shoulder before pounding in and out rapidly making Baekhyun squeak. Baekhyun gasps and moans brokenly – a series of _ah_ ’s leaving his lips sinfully. Kyungsoo stares at Baekhyun’s beautiful face, his bangs matted down his forehead, the sweat glistening his sexy body and the way his cock bounces in every thrust he delivers. Kyungsoo clamps his eyes shut and mutters. “Fuck.”

 

“Kyungsoo.” Baekhyun chants his name. “Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo.”

 

Kyungsoo pants, arms around Baekhyun’s legs as he continue his rapid movements. He thrusts hard and fast, enough to hear the loud skin slapping against skin. Baekhyun throws his head back and moans loud. He’s not sure if the next room in this hotel can hear what they’re doing but right now, none of them cares. At this moment, it’s Baekhyun and only Baekhyun. Nothing else.

 

“Wait, wait.” Baekhyun interrupts. Kyungsoo slowly ceases and stares at him while catching his breath. Baekhyun withdraws his leg and turns around so he’s in all fours. “Okay, now. Come on.” Kyungsoo nods and pushes back in. Baekhyun hangs his head low as he drawls out in pleasure.

 

Kyungsoo fucks him like he means it and Baekhyun managed to surprise Kyungsoo about his flexible body. On the bed, on the floor, on the wall – despite being the top, Baekhyun is dominating and honestly, it turns Kyungsoo on. They did it in every different position that they know and Kyungsoo is surprised at the improvement of stamina compared 11 years before. But that doesn’t mean he’s going to lose.

 

“Ah!” Baekhyun reaches his peak for the third time. He loosens his grip around Kyungsoo’s hair and blushes deeply when Kyungsoo laps up his cock for any remaining juices. He’s shaking like a leaf and his chest is heaving in heavy pants. Kyungsoo grins and crawls on the space beside him. Baekhyun turns to face him and purses his lips.

 

“You haven’t finished yet.”

 

“I did, actually. Twice, to be exact.” Kyungsoo smiles, the exhaustion visible on his face.

 

“But you’re still hard.” Baekhyun kisses him while his fingers trail down until it’s wrapped around the half-hard shaft. Kyungsoo groans against his lips. “I don’t mind doing this for hours.” He whispers after they pulled away. Kyungsoo chuckles softly.

 

“We still have to work tomorrow.”

 

“Cut me some slack. I’m happy.” Baekhyun cups his free hand on the younger’s cheek. Kyungsoo closes his eyes at the feeling. “My Kyungsoo came back to me.” Baekhyun leans to press his forehead against his. “You have no idea how happy I am.”

 

Kyungsoo was about to say something but stops when he feels Baekhyun stroking him slowly. Kyungsoo laughs. “Happy enough to give me a handjob?”

 

Baekhyun giggles. “I want to make love to you until the sun rises.”

 

“That’s not…” Baekhyun kisses him. Their lips parting with a soft wet noise. “…that’s not possible, silly.” Kyungsoo chuckles softly as Baekhyun kisses him again.

 

Of course it wasn’t possible like Kyungsoo said. After one last round, Baekhyun passed out from exhaustion and sleep came to Kyungsoo in a matter of seconds after that.

 

 

 

 

 

Morning came like a dream. Baekhyun woke up with a smile only to stop when he feels the other side cold. He immediately sat up despite the throbbing head and looks around wildly. That’s not – that’s can’t be right? That’s not possible. Kyungsoo couldn’t – He wouldn’t –

 

The door to the bathroom opened. “Baekhyun?”

 

Baekhyun stares at Kyungsoo fresh from the shower and already wearing his boxers and Baekhyun’s white shirt. “You’re up.” He has a towel on his shoulder and the tips of his hair is still dripping with water. Baekhyun swallows hard and bites his lower lip to stop it from wobbling. Kyungsoo must have notice because his brows were furrowed. “What’s wrong?”

 

“Nothing, I –“ Baekhyun gives a laugh and his eyes suddenly became glassy. “I just missed you a lot.”

 

Kyungsoo smiles and tosses the towel on the bed. His knee dips on the edge of the bed and then he started crawling towards Baekhyun until he’s hovering above him. Baekhyun smiles and looks at him straight in the eyes with nothing but love and adoration.

 

“I missed you, too.” Kyungsoo whispers. “A lot.”

 

He leans and gives him an Eskimo kiss before moving to sit on the edge of the bed. Baekhyun watches him as he does. Kyungsoo is exceptionally handsome and he smells so good that Baekhyun has to fight the urge to bury his nose against the younger man’s chest because contrary to Kyungsoo, Baekhyun probably smells like garbage. Mixed with booze from last night and morning breath, Baekhyun doesn’t want to kiss himself either. But Kyungsoo must have noticed his inner turmoil because he’s got a hand on Baekhyun’s head in a matter of seconds and he pulled him close against his chest. Baekhyun chuckles.

 

“You’re gonna get yourself dirty.”

 

“I prefer to start the morning with hugs and kisses, besides…” Kyungsoo looks at him, grinning mischievously. “I don’t mind starting the day dirty if it’s with you.”

 

He catches the double meaning behind those words. “But you just finished taking a shower.”

 

“On the bright side, we get to take a shower this time, together.”

 

“Oh, you make me blush, Do-sshi.” Baekhyun throws his head back and laughs when Kyungsoo pulls him in and pins him down on the bed, ready to start another session of morning love making when the door erupts with a series of hard knocks stopping them both.

 

 _“Baek-hyung, wake up. We need to go get breakfast!”_ The door knob rustles. _“Hyung~”_

 

“Shit.” Baekhyun mutters under his breath. He looks at Kyungsoo and the younger is also giving him the same panicked look. “U-Uh, Eunwoo-yah! I’ll skip breakfast with you today. Hyung’s got a hangover today. Err… maybe lunch later instead?”

 

There was a moment of silence. Kyungsoo looks at him worried. “Did you think he bought it?” He whispers.

 

“Shh…quiet.” Baekhyun presses a finger on the man’s lips. Kyungsoo kisses it and he tries hard not to squeal.

 

 _“Oh, okay! Just make sure to drink hangover soup later. I think you can order one at room service.”_ Eunwoo chuckles _. “I’ll see you later!”_ He knocks twice before leaving, his footsteps echoing.

 

Baekhyun doesn’t realize he’s holding his breath until Eunwoo left. Kyungsoo is still on top of him, looking at his door in a bit of relief before he shifts his attention down at him. Eunwoo’s appearance was a buzzkill so the sexual excitement that they have earlier is already gone. Baekhyun groans.

 

“I need to go.” Kyungsoo lowers his head to give him a chaste kiss on his lips. “We still have to go to work later. The construction –“

 

“No, no, finish what you started.” Baekhyun jumps off the bed and grabs him by the wrist. “We’re gonna have to kill two birds in one stone.” Kyungsoo looks confused when he pulls him in the bathroom. But it was only temporary because realization dawns on him like a ton of bricks. He grins.

 

Holding him by the waist, Kyungsoo whispers. “Good morning.”

 

“Good morning.” Baekhyun whispers back.

 

And then they kissed.

 

 

 

 

 

Afraid of running to Eunwoo, Baekhyun decided to order room service and also forced Kyungsoo to stay put even if their rooms are just near each other. Baekhyun tells that Eunwoo might see them together and draw conclusions. His real reason was because he couldn’t let go of the younger male not after everything. They still needed to talk, after all.

 

Kyungsoo sips on his coffee after swallowing the mouthful of waffles in his mouth, his eyes trained on the cup as he does. Baekhyun, on the other hand, still couldn’t believe what was happening. Do Kyungsoo looking so fresh (showered twice lol) and soft wearing his clothes while he eats breakfast with him on the hotel bed. It must be a dream. Either that or Baekhyun got schizophrenia.

 

Baekhyun takes a bite of his egg sandwich, taken back when Kyungsoo reaches over to wipe the corner of his mouth with a tissue. He blushes.

 

“Kyungsoo,”

 

The younger male hums and looks at him.

 

“What made you change your mind?”

 

Kyungsoo is silent for a moment before he answers, his eyes still trained at him. “I just realized that no matter how much I tried to stay away, if my heart keeps yearning and wanting you then there’s nothing I can do.” He answers. “And it’s disappointing how you made so many sacrifices for me and yet I, on the other hand…”

 

Baekhyun places his sandwich down on the tray and holds the younger’s hand firmly. “That’s not true and you know that. We both know how much you’ve suffered enough.”

 

“You broke off the engagement with Junmyeon.”

 

“It’s only inevitable. Even if I dislike it, it’s better to hurt him now instead of prolonging everything. He’s already suffering enough from my actions. He deserve someone that loves him more.” Kyungsoo looks down. Baekhyun sighs. “So you finally find out?”

 

It took a while before Kyungsoo groans. “I’m the worst best friend ever.”

 

Baekhyun falters. He thinks that Kyungsoo is going back to his normal ways, avoiding him and acting like what happened last night and today was nothing but a one-time thing. To his surprise, though, Kyungsoo squeezes their hands together. “But what’s done is done.” He said. “And I’ll be taking responsibility over you and to what happened.”

 

Baekhyun furrows his brows. “W-What do you mean? So like…” He gestures between Kyungsoo and himself with his free hand. “What are we, is that it?”

 

“What do you want us to be?”

 

Baekhyun is so fucking surprised. It’s like Kyungsoo is holding a gun and he keeps on shooting him over and over with bullets that penetrates his entire being. Everything’s happening too fast and it’s so overwhelming but at the same time it makes Baekhyun explode in happiness. “Ah.” He exclaims and places a hand on Kyungsoo’s chest, his head lowered in embarrassed. “Shit, don’t do this to me right now.”

 

Kyungsoo chuckles softly and holds the hand that was on his chest. Baekhyun bites his lower lip.

 

“Let’s not jump into labels then.” He answers. “What matters now is that I’m yours.”

 

It was only then that Baekhyun looks up to meet his eyes. “And I’m yours.” He whispers, the tiny string of his restraint has snapped and he’s already leaning once again to kiss Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo leans halfway to meet him but pulls back the last second. Baekhyun growls. “You destroyed the moment.”

 

Ignoring Baekhyun, he continues. “I think it’s best if we hide this from everyone.”

 

Baekhyun ponders for a moment. He’s not really the type of person who would hide relationships but from their given situation, they got no choice. His engagement just ended abruptly. It still hasn’t been announced in public and if ever the media would see him getting all handsy with Kyungsoo, he would be accused of cheating and their image would be tarnished. He’s already brought disappointment in his family by ending things with Junmyeon. He doesn’t want to dirty their name even more.

 

“Yeah, I think it’s for the best, too.” Baekhyun agrees. “Now can you just kiss me?”

 

“Ugh, seriously.” Nevertheless, Kyungsoo leans in to capture his upper lip in a soft bite, their lips lingering far longer than necessary until Baekhyun breaks it off laughing softly. Kyungsoo couldn’t help but smile.

 

“But I just want to let you know that I don’t plan on hiding us forever.” He said. “I want to let the world know that one of the nation’s hottest bachelors is mine and I’m not planning on sharing you with anyone… ever.” He hums. “So that means, no more photoshoots that involve those kind of magazines.”

 

Kyungsoo throws his head back and laughs. “Day 1 and you’re already laying out the ground rules.”

 

“I’m the kind of person that gets down to business, _Landon Park_.”

 

“Please don’t call me that. I find it weird now coming from you.”

 

“But I’m just calling you by your name.” Baekhyun smirks. “ _Landon_ -sshi.”

 

To be honest, they still had a lot to talk about. Baekhyun still wanted to know the things that happened when he wasn’t in Kyungsoo’s life. About his step-family, his job, his college life, his previous dating life – especially that one since he wanted to know how he even get to date Kim Jongin – but Baekhyun is willing to wait, of course. Their time here is still so long. They can face trouble later.

 

Right now, Kyungsoo is with him and that’s all that matters.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is to make up for the super long time I haven't updated.   
> still sorry about that. Tho i hope you liked this one :)


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Baekhyun closed the door giggling. But like a child, he went back and opens the door partially only to find Kyungsoo staring at the direction of the door with a slight smile on his face. He couldn’t help but giggle more, face heating up, blushing. Until now, he still couldn’t believe he’s back together with Kyungsoo. And he thinks, he’s never going to get used to this feeling.

_“It’s a pleasure for you to join us, Mr. Byun.”_ One of the members of the meeting said after he loudly opened the two huge doors of the meeting room. Every eyes were on him and he can feel his cheeks heat up in embarrassment.  He looks down and bows his head in apology before moving to his designated seat, next to Eunwoo.

 

When he took a seat, he meets eyes with Kyungsoo across him and he swore he saw a tiny smirk forming on that face. Baekhyun grits his teeth and sets his lips in a firm line.

 

Oh, that son of a bitch.

 

When the meeting was adjourned, Baekhyun purposely stayed a little while longer opposed to his usual stand up bolt and go plan whenever meetings ended. He eyes Kyungsoo, who was fixing the documents he has on file and carefully slotting them inside a brown envelope. He was too busy staring at Kyungsoo that he didn’t even notice Eunwoo behind him until he slams his hands on his shoulders. Baekhyun yelps, startled.

 

“Hyung’s gonna melt if you stare too much.” Eunwoo teases.

 

 _That’s the plan, yes_. But he got reminded of their arrangement so he swats Eunwoo on the arm and pushes him back as he stands up. “Shut up. Anyways, we’re still on for that lunch, yeah?”

 

“As always.” The younger male gestures with his hand. “Call me when you’re on lunch so that we can meet up at that restaurant we’ve been talking about. Payslip finally out last night so I’ve got a feeling that money is already in my account.” He grins and makes a triumphant chuckle. “So I’ll be going first. Got things to take care of.” He gives his shoulder another pat.

 

But before he could leave, he leans down and presses his lips against his ear to whisper. “Try not to stare at hyung too much. People might notice.”

 

Baekhyun’s eyes went wide when he pulls back, Eunwoo smirking as he does, before he turns around and leaves. Baekhyun blinks twice completely taken back, watching as the younger leaves the meeting room. And when it was only Kyungsoo and he left, he looks at his lover in disbelief. He scoffs a laugh. “What the fuck was that?”

 

“If there’s anyone who should be asking that, it’s me.” Kyungsoo hums, eyes still on the papers. “What was that with Eunwoo?”

 

Baekhyun looks at Kyungsoo, brows furrowed. “Was it obvious?”

 

“Obvious what?”

 

“The way I was staring at you the whole time.”

 

Kyungsoo chuckles. “You look like you were gonna eat me, to be honest.”

 

“Tempting, but I’m not into exhibitionism. Though, I wouldn’t mind devouring you in my room.” He pause. “Or yours.”

 

The younger of the two looks up, finally meeting his eyes. “You are shameless.”

 

“So they say.”

 

Kyungsoo raised a brow. “So that lunch with Eunwoo…”

 

“If we’re going to keep this thing between us a secret, we need to spend some time apart in public.” Baekhyun points between the two of them. “And I think it would do you some good since we have to focus on that construction first before anything else.” Upon hearing this, Kyungsoo slowly nods. Baekhyun stares at him for a few minutes, loving the way he’s pouting so he grins. “Don’t worry. I’m all yours behind closed doors.”

 

He approaches a frozen Kyungsoo and presses his lips on his cheek, beaming. “I’ll wait for you in my room. I’ll leave it unlock for you to come in easily.” 

 

It took a few moment before the thought processed in his head. “Yes.” It was shaky and Baekhyun almost laughed then and there but he doesn’t want to offend Kyungsoo in any way so he just bit his lip to prevent it from escaping. A futile attempt, though since it’s still showing. After a soft pat on the cheek, Baekhyun was a few steps on the door when he turns around and grins.

 

“You sure do get jealous easily, huh?”

 

“Baekhyun.”

 

“Right, right!” He squeaks. “I’m going.”

 

Baekhyun closed the door giggling. But like a child, he went back and opens the door partially only to find Kyungsoo staring at the direction of the door with a slight smile on his face. He couldn’t help but giggle more, face heating up, blushing. Until now, he still couldn’t believe he’s back together with Kyungsoo. And he thinks, he’s never going to get used to this feeling.

 

 

 

 

 

Junmyeon never missed a day calling Baekhyun in hopes the younger would answer the call and give him answers. Luhan, the other’s secretary, he had tried asking but to no avail, Baekhyun isn’t answering his calls either. Though he does send some documented reports about what’s happening with their project, other than that, he doesn’t reach out to communicate with them.

 

Jongdae is clueless. He wasn’t aware of Baekhyun breaking the engagement not until he told him. And Jongdae looked so conflicted and guilty but Junmyeon assured him that it wasn’t his fault.

 

Sitting in his dim office, he plays with his engagement ring with his fingers. Does Baekhyun still wear his outside? Does he even think of him before he starts the day? Or jut even at the end of the day. Junmyeon doesn’t know. He thought he knew Baekhyun but at that very moment, he suddenly grew confused. Like all this time, is Baekhyun unsure of everything?

 

He sighs and places the ring back on his finger.

 

He could fly over there and be with Baekhyun right now but he knows all the younger needed is some space. And then, surely he’ll come back.

 

Right?

 

 

 

 

 

_“You broke up with Junmyeon, are you insane?!”_

 

Baekhyun winced and pulls the phone away from his ear. “Hello to you, too.” He mutters after placing it back against his ear. “How are things going in there in Seoul? You and Minseok-hyung still doing great, I hope?”

 

 _“Why did you broke things off with Junmyeon?”_ Jongdae insists. _“Have you gone crazy? You know how important this is yet you still did that impulsively without even considering his feelings. My god, Baekhyun.”_

 

Baekhyun was feeling happy recently so he decided to accept the call from his best friend, but the moment this was shed to light, the happy expression he has on his face falters and falls into a serious one. “Jongdae.” He trails. “Jongdae, can we please not talk about this.” He waves off Eunwoo who mouths, “Is everything okay?” before standing up to leave the office.

 

The airy breeze was the first thing that greeted him when he entered the pantry balcony. From afar, he can see the construction going on and he thinks how Kyungsoo is doing for a moment. That is until he’s being pulled back to reality where he’s talking to his best friend.

 

 _“No, let’s talk about it right now.”_ Jongdae hisses. He could practically see him seething in annoyance. He never did like it whenever he swerves the subject. _“Why did you break off the engagement?”_

 

Baekhyun looks up and sighs, his thumb aching to end the call. “Things just happened. And I realized that jumping into marriage with Junmyeon is something that I might regret later in the future that’s why I backed out. It’s better end things today before the damage turns bigger.”

 

There was a long pause before Jongdae continues. _“Are you really still hung up on Do Kyungsoo?”_

 

“Why do you think every decision I make always revolves around Kyungsoo?” Baekhyun’s jaw clenched. “Why can’t it just be me? What if I told you I’m still not ready to settle down?”

 

 _“I know you, Baekhyun. And I –“_ Jongdae releases a heavy sigh. There’s a sound of sheets ruffling on the background and he thinks that his best friend might be lying around on his bed. _“I just think that everything that happened is my fault, you know? If I didn’t mention Kyungsoo to Junmyeon then maybe…”_

“It’s not your fault.” Baekhyun lowers his head. “If I have opened up to Junmyeon about Kyungsoo, then maybe this wouldn’t have happened.” He pauses for a minute. “But I could have… there’s just a part of me that’s scared…”

 

Jongdae sighs again. _“Just… talk to Junmyeon, alright? Believe it or not, he’s still waiting for you.”_

“Yeah.” Baekhyun nods. “I will soon.”

 

He didn’t notice his heart racing until the call ended. Confrontation, it’s something that he’s terrified of feeling. He knows sooner or later, he’s going to talk to Junmyeon and tell him about the truth. But he’s scared of how Junmyeon will see him after so maybe that’s a part of why he’s always pushing it soon. He knows he needs to and he should do it soon.

 

A knock on the glass door startles him.

 

“Hey,” Kyungsoo gives him a small wave. Pressed against his chest is a paper bag with a McDonald’s logo in it and though it looks like the younger is excited to see him, his face falls into a serious one when he noticed his state. “What’s wrong?”

 

“Nothing, I…” He breathlessly laughed. “I just missed you.”

 

He needs to talk to Junmyeon. For him and Kyungsoo’s future.

 

 

 

 

 

There’s been a flood of emails coming in his phone regarding an appointment scheduled for him to meet President Do but Kyungsoo keeps on brushing it aside and resorting to deleting all of those emails. The old man is really persistent on getting to meet him. So why now when he has many opportunity back when he’s still a kid? Or back when his parents are still alive?

 

“There you go again with that face.” Kyungsoo snaps his head up to see Baekhyun sucking on a chicken bone. They just ordered three buckets of chicken wings for dinner, with almost half of it being devoured by said male.  Kyungsoo runs his fingers through his hair and sighs, leaning his back against Baekhyun’s green bean bag. “You always do that face recently. What’s going on?” He leans close. “Talk to me, Soo.”

 

“It’s nothing.” But he stops when he sees the look on Baekhyun’s face.

 

“I thought we agreed that we aren’t going to hide things between each other again.”

 

“I’m telling the truth. It’s really nothing.”

 

“If it’s nothing, why are you making that face?”

 

“What face?”

 

“You know that face you make when you’re emo and shit.”

 

Kyungsoo furrows his brows. “Emo and shit? Seriously?” Baekhyun’s persistent gaze is still on him and he’s already munching on another wing. “Okay, fine.” He sees Baekhyun move his hips so that the bean bag is closer to him. “President Do is trying to schedule an appointment to meet me. I already declined but he’s so persistent.”

 

Baekhyun hums. “President Do? I met him once at a business conference. He’s a scary man, that old geezer. Why?” He swallows the chicken that he’s been chewing. “What does he even want with you? Are you really that great of an engineer that everyone wants you?” He teases. Kyungsoo chuckles.

 

“I wish it were that simple.” He looks down on his phone, grimacing when another email was sent. “Unfortunately, he’s my grandfather.”

 

Hearing that got Baekhyun choking on his chicken. Kyungsoo immediately rubs his back and hands him his glass of water which the older of the two accepted graciously. After three long gulps, Baekhyun gasps and looks at Kyungsoo with eyes wide as saucers. “That old man is your grandfather?!”

 

Kyungsoo nods. “He wants me to take over once he retires. I said no.”

 

Baekhyun stares at him, mouth gaping. “I didn’t know that.” He wipes the oil and grease on his shirt messily before holding his wrist. Kyungsoo raised a brow and opens his mouth to comment how messy that is but was cut off at his insistent tug. “I didn’t know President Do is your grandfather. You never told me.”

 

“You never asked.”

 

He scrunches his nose. “Then tell me more.”

 

Kyungsoo hums. “About?”

 

Baekhyun purses his lips and then gives him a half-grin. “Tell me how you and Kim Jongin dated back in college.” When he sees him groan, Baekhyun simply laughed and shakes his wrist. “Kyungsoo, come on! Tell me about you and Jongin back then. I deserve to know that.”

 

Kyungsoo is reluctant at first but then he relented with a nod. “Jongin is a very… clingy guy when we first met. Clingy, curious… keeps on asking questions about me. One time, he stumbled in my dorm room drunk. Jongin is a happy drunk and he couldn’t stop talking, too. That night, he blurted out that he likes me. Said that he couldn’t get off me out of his mind. He asked me out, I said no. Then he asked me out again a week after that and he was sober. This time, I said yes.”

 

Baekhyun tilts his head and hums. “So you agreed to date him because he’s pushy?”

 

“I agreed to date him because he helped me get you out of my mind.” Baekhyun doesn’t seem to like the sound of that so Kyungsoo added, “Well, it didn’t go that well, anyway. Getting you out of my mind, that is.”

 

“Of course.” Baekhyun huffs. “I am hard to get over with.”

 

“But Jongin’s dick game is hard to forget, though. I was doubting it when he said I was his first because damn those hips could really plow me down like –“

 

“Shut up, Kyungsoo.”

 

He smiles at Baekhyun and presses his lips against the side of his head. He knows the pout and the angry frown on the other’s face is nothing but an act. He knows because even if he’s _upset_ , Baekhyun is still pressing his head against his face as if he’s asking for more kisses and that greasy hold on his wrist is still tight. Kyungsoo playfully roll his eyes and chuckles against the other’s hair.

 

“But no matter how many people I dated, I still find myself going back to you.” He whispers.

 

“Cheesy.” But Baekhyun is smiling and he’s looking at him like he’s everything even if he knows he’s nothing. “But yeah, me too. I still love you even if you keep on running away from me.”

 

Kyungsoo smiles and leans to give him small kiss on the lips, chuckling when Baekhyun laughs against his lips before they continue on giving small and chaste kisses in between laughter.

 

The laughs they shared must have been too loud for them to even hear the small beeping noise in the front door. They keep on exchanging small and chaste kisses that they didn’t even stop that is until they heard a soft gasp coming from the doorway. Kyungsoo and Baekhyun froze, panic welling up their chests when they snap their heads towards the direction of the noise.

 

“Luhan?” Baekhyun shot from the bean bag, legs wobbly so he stumbled back a bit. Kyungsoo holds him by the waist so that he wouldn’t fall. “W-What are you doing here?!”

 

Luhan’s still in a state of shock. “You and Landon Park…” Then he shakes his head and nervously smiled. “Uh… surprise?”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> unbeta'ed as always.   
> you all are gonna kill me for hurting Junmyeon anyway so... *rolls away*


End file.
